Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers - Defamer Comments

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Chapter29 — Fri, 06 Jul 2007 12:51:32 PDT

Wait...I did not read all the posts in this blog, but I do not see any mention of the image in between the girls hair at the 1.18.08 website...am I the only one that sees it?!! It looks like some sort of dragon monster with a long mandible. Check it out cause its right there in between their heads!!

Chapter29

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Jeremy — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 20:10:17 PDT

A herky-jerky film made by video cameras!! Sign me up, because I sure didn't get enough of that from the Blair Witch Project!!!

Also known as the movie I walked out of, and asked for my money back. And got it. :P

Jeremy

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Miss d — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 18:35:27 PDT

By the time it's released - the mystery will all but be evaporated...

Miss d

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Victor Ward — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 17:30:53 PDT

Goddammit JJ JUST TELL ME WHAT THE FUCKING SMOKE MONSTER IS.

Victor Ward

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Banolwen — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 17:27:23 PDT

@von_Sooner: I'd pay money to see that! Are these real people or those mutant dwarves in circus clown cars?

Banolwen

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Banolwen — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 17:25:29 PDT

@Juancho: And not trying to put this spicy bowl of Fusilli into the same category as movies previous listed, just showing that Jan. is a good month for films. We'll see about this one!

Banolwen

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

von_Sooner — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 17:10:23 PDT

Apparently it's "spacious enough to accommodate forty visitors at a time." 10 feet my ass.

[www.corrosion-doctors.org]

von_Sooner

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Banolwen — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 17:04:06 PDT

@Juancho: That's incorrect, January is when kids are back in school and more adult good releases come out. Just going by films that have been nominated and/or won Oscars, here's a sample of the last few years

Million Dollar Baby - 28 January 2005
The Pianist - 3 January 2003
The Hours - 24 January 2003
Chicago - 24 January 2003
Beautiful Mind - 4 January 2002
Gosford Park - 4 January 2002
Blackhawk Down - 18 January 2002
In the Bedroom - 11 January 2002
Chocolat - 5 January 2001
Magnolia - 7 January 2000
The Hurricane - 14 January 2000
Girl, Interrupted - 14 January 2000
Good Will Hunting - 9 January 1998

Granted, the last two years have been a bit less Oscar oriented (Hostel, etc.) January is a good film month as the studios go for adult and art-house faire. It's intended for films that have legs on them, so word of mouth can carry them through Feb. March until Summer is the dead months.

Banolwen

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

CatherineTrammell — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 14:48:11 PDT

Am I the only one who just assumed it was a remake of "Escape from New York?" I figured the head landing gave it away.

CatherineTrammell

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

acereject — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 14:35:21 PDT

I've seen the opening credits for "Working Girl" about a hundred times, so I'm an expert on the subject: Lady Liberty's mug is only ten feet wide.

acereject

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Juancho — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 14:34:30 PDT

@Banolwen: That's why they're technically December releases. They go wide in January.

Movies released from 1/8 through Valentine's Day and 8/15 through mid-September are generally the films that have had a bullet put in them and are being dumped.

Juancho

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Banolwen — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 14:17:46 PDT

@Banolwen: 1 screen in LA county I mean

Banolwen

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Banolwen — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 14:15:03 PDT

@ericdsnider: That's actually not true, some of the best movies are released in January. They tend to be more closely aligned with Art-house and more adult oriented topics (In the Bedroom, Blackhawk Down, etc.) This is when they will get the most critical visibility and can be good for awards season (provided they show on at least 1 screen prior to the ball dropping in NYC)

Banolwen

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Banolwen — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 14:08:37 PDT

@Colonel Mustard: Yup, checked my spelling and you definitely do have me there. Perhaps, I can't help but be interested in seeing NYC "blowed up" when 4 single women are the culprits

Banolwen

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

whytee — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 13:39:46 PDT

@Juancho. It needs to do the decent thing and commit discreet suicide and no one will ever talk about it ever again!

whytee

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Sleepyhead — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 13:31:05 PDT

@yellojkt: I submit to the gentle corrections of Wonkette. I really thought the hat was like a big hollow viewing station, but that was probably a cartoon and not real life. It seemed plenty big when Remo Williams was up there fighting those assassins on the scaffolding.

Sleepyhead

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

D.O.D. — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 13:28:06 PDT

it could be a remake of Liquid Sky ala Abrams

D.O.D.

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Juancho — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 13:26:06 PDT

It's official, viral marketing is no longer cool.

Juancho

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Glass_Family — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 13:02:36 PDT

Jesus this looks awesome, even though i can't see shit. It makes me almost want to pay to see Transformers.

Almost.

Glass_Family

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Juancho — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 13:02:12 PDT

@ericdsnider: You are correct sir!

January release date + no "name" actors= Dumped in the middle of winter.

Juancho

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

ericdsnider — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 12:49:12 PDT

I think we're forgetting something important here: As good as the trailer might be, no movie released in January has ever been any good. Yet J.J. wears the January release date as a badge of honor! The mischievous pixie!

ericdsnider

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

TedSez — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 12:31:16 PDT

You watch the movie, then seven years later they tell you what really happened. (Hint: The time-space continuum was altered by magnets in Greg Grunberg's hat.)

TedSez

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

wundergirl — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 12:19:38 PDT

@Colonel Mustard:

Michael Vartan you say? Well, shoot. I don't care what this movie is about. JJ Abrams: you have my $13 bucks.

wundergirl

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Colonel Mustard — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 12:19:35 PDT

@Banolwen: You're going to skip the SATC movie, then?

Colonel Mustard

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

jenndavo — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 12:16:11 PDT

Rumor has it that this is something from the Godzilla oeuvre. A gushing description of the trailer and a few good theories can be found here:

[www.firstshowing.net]

jenndavo

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Banolwen — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 12:12:09 PDT

My god man, how many times are we going to fork out $15 to go see Manhattan blowed up, fugged up, swallowed up & chewed up? None of this even comes close to comparing to the fear we felt when it was real.....

I'd pay extra to see them blow up Hoboken!

Banolwen

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

secretagentman — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 12:03:46 PDT

Way back in Feb., when we read some parts of the script, we thought it might be Star Trek: Beginning, but realized Abrams had actually written fake material for auditions. He's a scamp that one.

secretagentman

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Baronzemo — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 11:58:00 PDT

My favorite dummy title for this Abrams goodness is "Slusho", which is the Slurpee they drink on Planet "Alias" but I guess that title was already registered by the MPAA for a Lindsay Lohan documentary

[www.downtownnews.com]
[www.blogdowntown.com]

Baronzemo

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

yellojkt — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 11:56:14 PDT

@Colonel Mustard: If it doesn't have Keri Russell or Jennifer Garner, I'm staying home.

yellojkt

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

yellojkt — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 11:55:10 PDT

@Sleepyhead: According to dorky sister site Wonkette, the Statue of Liberty just has a rickety fire trap spiral stair to the top.

yellojkt

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

brokennails — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 11:46:00 PDT

Okay, according to [www.endex.com] the head is about 17 feet high and 10 feet wide. Not that big. Yep, I guess it is like Tom Cruise that way.

brokennails

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

econdave — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 11:43:39 PDT

@brokennails:

Yeah, it's kind of like Tom Cruise that way.

econdave

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Colonel Mustard — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 11:39:02 PDT

I think I saw Michael Vartan in that trailer, and I'll follow him anywhere. Sign me up for Inscrutable JJ Abrams Project!

Colonel Mustard

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

Sleepyhead — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 11:36:39 PDT

I think you're thinking of the Lincoln Memorial, which seems like it should be ginormous but is only 12 feet high. The SoL has an elevator that you can take up to the head.

Untitled-Abrams-film trailer had our whole theatre whispering "What is that?", "Have you even heard of that?". Excellent marketing / buzz-building / trailer placement. It's also code-named / tenta-titled "The Parasite", I hear.

And, my mini-Transformers-review:
"The best Michael Bay film ever"=
"The best time a rabid badger bit my balls"=
"My most favorite unwilling organ donation".

Sleepyhead

Mysterious J.J. Abrams Trailer Confounds Audiences Looking For Hard, Michael Bay-Style Answers

brokennails — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 11:23:54 PDT

Actually, isn't the Statue of Liberty much smaller than anyone thinks?

brokennails