Defamer: Vandalism

Sienna Miller Wondering If She Can Borrow A Can Of Slut-Off

STV — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 14:45:00 PDT

"Scandalism" is all the rage these days in London, where the hottest gossip of the day is found in neither Fleet Street rags nor blogs but rather spray-painted on the very walls of its subjects' homes. Exhibit A: Sienna Miller, whose recent, only slightly immodest dalliance with married father Balthazar Getty (among other tormented ex-flames) may or may not have prompted the scandalism above, which materialized on Miller's home late one recent evening. The ensuing investigation is going pretty much as sluggishly you'd expect; we're told a reward is available for information leading to the culprit's capture and conviction, just as soon as Nottingham is green lit again.

Sienna's house vandalised [The Sun]

10 Dead, 5 Injured In Britney Spears Hustler Store Shopping Spree

Seth — Thu, 29 Nov 2007 10:15:33 PST

Just a day after Star magazine exposed the chilling truth about the sex-dungeon in Britney Spears's Mulholland Dr. mansion, based off of blueprints the singer scribbled on a McDonald's placemat painstakingly plotting the placement of every pommel horse and industrial-sized lube-dispenser, Us Weekly now reports that the singer invaded the Hustler store for a lacy-underthings spree that resulted in a possibly criminal act of petty, mannequin-de-wigging larceny:

Spears loaded up on naughty skivvies and headed to the fitting rooms. But store employees "told her they don't allow people to try on underwear," a source at the scene says. "She was really upset." [...]

At that point, Spears threw a fit, and took off her own underwear before trying on a pair of boyshorts (with "Barely Legal' stitched across the rear end) in the middle of the store while 15 other customers looked on.
An eyewitness tells Us, "The employees kept saying 'Don't change out here!' She's just like, 'Well, I couldn't take them in the fitting room!' It was like dealing with a child."

Spears' tantrum only continued. "The staff told her she had to pay, and she rolled her eyes, but paid with a credit card," the source tells Us. As payback, "on her way out, she went up to a mannequin, snatched the wig off the head, and stole it!"

What may have seemed to onlookers to have been spiteful vandalism was, we suspect, a far more symbolic act, with the troubled pop star seeing much of herself when she gazed into the dead eyes of a dummy decked out in risqué apparel and propped in the window for all the world to gawk at. Ridding it of its wig, therefore, was a liberating gesture no less momentous than the night she shaved off her own locks of at a Tarzana beauty salon, binding the flesh and fiberglass sisters forever in a moment of Joan of Arc-ian fidelity.

Britney Spears Strips Off Underwear in Porn Shop; Shoplifts Wig [usmagazine.com

Hipster Shrine To Elliott Smith Defaced By Heartless Tagger

Seth — Thu, 20 Sep 2007 17:07:01 PDT

It's unlikely they'll ever catch the tagger who dared deface the Hipster Shrine to Suspiciously Fallen Indie Guitar Idol Elliott Smith with a thick stream of drooling robin's-egg-blue paint. (Seriously—what the fuck did he use, a modified leafblower?) Well listen here, NOSE, or MUSE, or whatever your name is: Having chosen to befoul a sacred Silver Lake burial ground, prepare now to live out the remainder of your days tormented by a thousand shoegazing spirits. You'll find yourself wishing you hadn't bluewashed over hundreds of goodbye poems once you find yourself visited every night by their infinitely-looping rendition of the "Miss Misery" chorus.

Blue [Montecito Heights, Above the City via CurbedLA]