Lindsay Lohan's Intolerable Shit Costs Her 'Manson' Role

Semi-rehabilitated celebrity minknapper Lindsay Lohan was all set to star in charmingly titled anti-romantic comedy The Manson Girls, the second installment of her Great Homicidal Psychopaths of Modern History Trilogy that began with Chapter 27 and was to conclude with her harrowing performance as the Austrian incest dungeon victim in The Basement, a Starz Original Film. But as Deadline Hollywood Daily now reports, Lohan has been let go from the production:

Lindsay in the true life crime film was to play the dramatic part of Nancy Pitman, a pampered surfer girl who became enthralled with Charlie Manson. But insiders explain that Lohan quickly became more of a deficit than an asset when they discovered that they couldn't find any name actresses who wanted to co-star with her.

Katherine Heigl Seeks Escape From Doomed 'Grey's' In Search Of Big-Screen Stardom

Are Scientology Moms Katie Holmes And Leah Remini Feeding Their Kids Toxic 'Hubbard's Formula'?

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'NY Times' Riles An Already Grumpy, Taco-Deprived Population

Metromix L.A. posted an angry—and justifiably so, we'd say—response to a NY Times piece from earlier in the week about the movement to save L.A.'s beloved taco trucks, currently endangered thanks to new city ordinances that would limit where they can do business. (The article begins, "Los Angeles, loath to rally cohesively around a local cause, has joined hands around tortillas," and continues to paint a portrait of an apathetic community who only manage to rally when the fate of their al pastor-access is in danger.) Decries Metromix:

In drawing upon predictable stereotypes, Steinhauer presumes that food is not in itself political. While we stupid Angelenos fail to notice real issues like architectural blights on our skyline or the mismanagement of municipal funds, the food-obsessed have rallied around something as inconsequential as taco "carts."

Will Larry King Pass The Softball- Lobbing Torch To Ryan Seacrest?

Despite having secured his future at CNN until 2010, Larry King, who come this November will turn 138, has finally acknowledged the fact that his career might have a finite end. (Even if his legacy does not: His Last Will and Testament contains detailed instructions of the children he expects his wife to bear from the 14 packages of Cryovaced semen he keeps stored in an industrial freezer in his basement.) That said, it's being reported that King is eyeing none other than American Idol's Master of Karaoke-Administrating Ceremonies Ryan Seacrest to fill his legendary seat. From The Scoop:

A source from within CNN says that Seacrest, who has filled in for his friend Larry King in the past, is involved in "serious negotiations" to take over "Larry King Live" around [2009]'s end.

Elisabeth Hasselbeck's Abs Are Living The American Dream

Everyone's favorite daytime punching bag Elisabeth Hasselbeck has undergone an impressive physical transformation in the six months since birthing son Taylor Thomas, shedding every trace of her pregnancy weight and showing off her newly shredded, Survivor-era physique on the cover of this month's Fitness magazine. (An alternate cover, featuring The View co-host in a revealing two-piece bathing suit reading, "Mission Accomplished," was ultimately deemed to be in questionable taste, and rejected in favor of the fetching aqua design you see above.)

The Wachowskis Still in Hiding as 'Speed Racer' Circles the Drain

For all its confectionery imagery, Christina Ricci scene-stealing and the few other things Speed Racer gets right, it still faces a box-office false start that could make Leatherheads look like a hit in comparison. We sketched a few of the hurdles here yesterday (number one being its own studio's resignation to its underachievement), but at this point there's only one that counts: Larry and Andy Wachowski need to climb out of their hole.

It might be self-serving of us to suggest they publicize their films, and in a way, we empathize with their reclusion; Larry Wachowski has been the subject of sex-change and dominatrix-dating speculation since a feminized version of himself — earrings, plucked eyebrows, manicure — showed up on the Matrix Revolutions red carpet in Cannes five years ago with mistress Ilsa Strix (née Karen Winslow) on his arm. The siblings later sneaked into the New York premiere of V For Vendetta (which they wrote and co-produced), and last week in Los Angeles they went positively presidential with subterfuge at the debut of Speed Racer. "They did not do the red-carpet press line at the Nokia Theatre on Saturday, and were well-camouflaged during the after-party," wrote Borys Kit in The Hollywood Reporter. "Photographers were sworn to secrecy as to their whereabouts, and Warner Bros. assigned handlers the mission of keeping journalists off the scent."

Madonna Slips Female Fan Some Tongue On Stage, Lourdes Asks 'Is Mommy Gay?'

The Hills: 'I Want To Get My Hands In There And Make Myself Available To You'

Barbara Walters Recalls Riding In The Bus With Her Emotionally Retarded Surrogate Daughter, Rosie

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Scarlett Johansson And Ryan Reynolds Engaged To Each Other

Scarlett Johansson, daughter of Danish-born architect Karsten Johansson and Melanie Sloan, a producer from the Bronx of Ashkenazi Jewish heritage, has accepted Ryan Reynolds's hand in marriage. The groom-to-be hails from Vancouver, Canada, the son of Tammy Reynolds, a salesperson and career student, and Jim Reynolds, a food wholesaler and former semi-professional boxer.

Ms. Johansson, 23, is a BAFTA-winning and four-time Golden Globe-nominated actress and singer, who first rose to prominence playing a severely traumatized teenage girl in The Horse Whisperer. She later went on to receive critical acclaim for her starring turns in movies like Ghost World, Lost in Translation, and the Woody Allen-helmed Match Point, the last of which would mark the start of a long personal and creative relationship with the legendary director. Most recently, Ms. Johansson has branched out into recording arts as well, releasing an album of Tom Waits songs entitled "Anywhere I Lay My Head." It features a duet with rock icon David Bowie.

The Schlub Factor (And Four Other Reasons 'Iron Man' Struck Box Office Gold)

We assumed in last week's Defamer Attractions column that $75 million opening-weekend estimates seemed awfully conservative for Iron Man, but even our $90 million forecast undershot the film's $100.7 million three-day take. (It was $104.2 million if you count Thursday night previews, and more than $200 million globally.) Aside from the obligatory splash for any early-summer tentpole, we're surprised observers didn't see the finely calibrated alchemy that Marvel and Paramount used to spin its Iron into box office gold:

1. The Schlub Factor. Like Sam Raimi, who guided Marvel's previous blockbuster franchise Spider-Man to its own record openings in 2001, 2004 and 2007, director Jon Favreau is kind of a schlub — a normal dude who came up through the ranks and pretty much is his audience. He's not Ang Lee, whose misunderstood Hulk is disavowed to the point that its own studio is remaking it this summer (with another non-schlub, French action auteur Louis Leterrier), or even Bryan Singer, whose X-Men franchise coasted on star power before burning itself out at the hands of patronizer extraordinaire Brett Ratner. Favreau imposes a fan's vision and an indie mandate (i.e. character development, budget-mindedness) that works primarily because it threatens no one — neither the studio that paid for it nor the viewers spreading word-of-mouth months in advance and lining up around the block on opening weekend.

Tom Cruise's Couch-Jumping Justification: 'It Was A Moment'

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Defamer Interviews Harmony Korine: Bringing Michael Jackson and Skydiving Nuns Together at Last

It was a rough spring at the movies for compulsive watch-checkers like us, but we took consolation in knowing that a honest-to-God hero would be arriving come early May. What? No, not that wuss Iron Man, but rather Harmony Korine, whose new Mister Lonely marks the filmmaker's first writing-directing effort in nearly 10 years. And what a decade: Adrift in Paris, anchored in Nashville, survivor of two house fires, briefly reteaming with his Kids director Larry Clark on the teenagers-fucking milestone Ken Park, and ultimately conjuring Mister Lonely from a vision of nuns plunging from airplanes and the garish subculture of celebrity impersonators.

It makes all the sense in the world. Really! Just ask him.