Defamer: Tilda Swinton

First 'Burn After Reading' Reviews Suggest It's Either Brilliant Or Crap

Seth — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 14:50:00 PDT

With the exciting news that Brad Pitt has won his second best actor chalice today at the Venice Film Festival—for what the judging committee deemed his "indomitable spirit both on and off the screen, his effortless embodiment of the American masculine ideal, and the way sucking up to him will facilitate future access to his impossibly fertile and glamorous life partner, Angelina Jolie"—we thought it time to finally time to take a look at the movie which ushered him to victory. We speak, of course, of the Coen brothers' Burn After Reading, which had its world premiere tonight at the festival. If Pitt, as Javier Bardem did before him, could win top accolades with a hairstyle this ridiculous looking, then this truly must have been another masterwork from the sibling geniuses. Let's see what the critics are saying. (And yes, spoilers ensue.)

· The Guardian uses the word "triumph" and gives it four stars out of five, calling it "a tightly wound, slickly plotted spy comedy that couldn't be in bigger contrast" to No Country for Old Men, but that the Coens film it most closely resembles is "the divorce-lawyer comedy Intolerable Cruelty." Everyone gets a chance to shine comically, but "Pitt, in fact, gets the best of the funny stuff, [though] has by some way the least screen time of all the principal cast." [The Guardian]

· Counterpoint! Variety hated it. Calling it a "dark goofball comedy about assorted doofuses in Washington, D.C.," Burn "tries to mate sex farce with a satire of a paranoid political thriller," with "with arch and ungainly results." Further, a "seriously talented cast" has been "asked to act like cartoon characters," with everything turned up to a "grotesquely exaggerated extent." [Variety]
· Yeesh. That last one didn't go so well. Let's go back to loving it again! The Times Online also gives it four stars. Noting it's the first Coen-penned screenplay since 2001's The Man Who Wasn’t There, they compare it to Raising Arizona and Fargo (yay!) in its "savagely comic taste for creative violence and a slightly mocking eye for detail." Carter Burwell’s score is a "brilliant...paranoid piece of film music," though if the movie lacks for anything, it's "warmth." [Times Online]

You Must Be At Least This Tall To Ride Tilda Swinton

Douglas Reinhardt — Fri, 09 May 2008 11:05:00 PDT

boomp3.com

Beloved character actor Peter Dinklage attempted to get some face time with his The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian co-star Tilda Swinton at the film's premiere, but Swinton would not lower her neck to look down. Swinton insisted that Dinklage stand on an apple box if he would like to have a conversation. According to sources, Swinton said, "Peter, I've won an Oscar, so basically I'm allowed to do whatever crazy thing I want to do for the rest of the year. So, come on, let's find some phone books or a booster seat and let's catch up. How's your family?"

[Photo Credit: Splash Pics]

Brad Pitt Hoping To Ride His Own Silly, Coens-Movie Hairdo To Oscar Gold

Seth — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 17:05:00 PDT

Clearly committed to the same, ridiculous hairstyling tactics that helped to win Javier Bardem an Academy Award for No Country For Old Men, the Coen brothers put the supporting pretty-boy superstar of their next effort, the Venice Film Fest-opening Burn After Reading, in a License to Drive-era Haimdo. The wardrobe choice is guaranteed to lend even further realism to Brad Pitt's already brilliantly realized performance as a dimwitted gym employee. After the jump, via firstshowing.net, are your first looks at Pitt's Burn co-stars, George Clooney, Tilda Swinton, and John Malkovich, plus a plot synopsis for the spoiler-resilient:

Burn centers on Osbourne Cox (Malkovich), who has hit a bit of rough patch. He was recently fired from the CIA and decides to write his memoirs, naturally documenting government secrets along the way. His wife (Swinton) decides to steal the material to use in their upcoming divorce proceedings, but the CD mistakenly ends up in the hands of two doltish gym employees, Chad (Pitt) and Linda (McDormand). In response to Linda and Chad conspiring to sell the material to help pay for Linda's plastic surgery, the CIA dispatches Harry (Clooney) to sort it all out at whatever the cost.

New Photos: Coen Brother's Burn After Reading [firstshowing.net]

Another Weird Jackson

Seth — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 17:58:06 PST

· Much like her brother Michael, we have a hard time really buying the whole girlish falsetto of Janet Jackson's voice. It's as if she's just waiting for a commercial break to unleash that Howard Stern-esque basso profundo of hers. [Ellen]
· Ellen Page pulls out of Sam Raimi's Drag Me to Hell, reportedly because "she didn't like the latest draft of the script." Which strikes us as just the sort of excuse someone who'd bring their lesbian power publicist as their date to the Oscars would give, doesn't it? [bloody-disgusting.com]
· We must hand it to that Tilda Swinton: She's a pistol. She's already converted her Oscar into a hash pipe. So handy! [Popbytes]
· Now you're all Archuleta, Archuleta, Archuleta, as if Sanjaya never even existed. Well what if we sweetened the Malakar by offering you a shot of the Ponyhawked One...shirtless? We thought so. Enjoy. [rickey.org]
· Next time you have company over, serve them a nice glass of wine in a bacon cup! They can even eat it once they're done drinking. [Not Martha via WOW]

Your 2008 Oscars in 120 Seconds

Mark Graham — Mon, 25 Feb 2008 17:34:52 PST

All told, we here at Defamer devoted five hours and forty-six minutes to watching and chronicling the 2008 Academy Awards last night. And wouldn't you know it, during that stretch, there were only a handful of moments that we'll remember next week, let alone next year. To that end, we gave Intrepid Defamer Videographer™ Molly McAleer the unenviable assignment of paring last night's overblown monstrosity down to only its most essential elements. So wave buh bye to no-name costume designers and bid a not-so-fond farewell to Jon Stewart's blandly serviceable monologue, for this two-minute bestlight reel is chock full of moments like Gary Busey neck-raping Jennifer Garner, Joey Fatone drinking Lisa Rinna's milkshake and Tilda Swinton giving George Clooney's rubber nipples the business (among other gems). Enjoy!

WATCH VIDEO

Party Roundup: It Was No 'VF' Extravaganza, But Elton John Knows How To Throw A Party

Molly Friedman — Mon, 25 Feb 2008 10:36:35 PST

Even though Hollywood's A-List was deprived of a chance to eat and drink on Vanity Fair's dime last night, two fiestas proved that celebrities will not let a little thing like tradition get in the way of a night of free booze and swag. Elton John's Annual AIDS Foundation Oscar Party usually has a strong turnout of power players, but the star wattage at the 16th incarnation of the bash last night was a few standard deviations past the norm, thanks mainly to the absence of Graydon Carter's soiree. Highlights included Tilda Swinton kissing her Oscar in some sort of Buddhist mating ritual, as well as the public debut of Hollywood's newest power couple, Sean Penn and Petra Nemcova. We've got pictures after the jump.

Elton John 16th Annual AIDS Foundation Oscar Party:

Elton John coddled Best Actress winner Marion Cotillard, while model Petra Nemcova and Sean Penn canoodled all night as the newest couple in Hollywood making their big debut on Oscar night.

Harrison Ford (victim of perhaps Jon Stewart's worst joke of the evening) arrived with the (finally) well-dressed Calista Flockhart; Courtney Love managed to clean up her act; Seal turned the cameras on the cameramen.

Kate Beckinsale proved having kids does not a schlumpy mom make; Portia de Rossi and Ellen DeGeneres continued their Lesbians Are Cool, Just Deal With It Tour; Jeremy Piven took a break from his yoga pursuits to swing by The Rocket Man's shindig.

Other guests included:
Simon Cowell, Sharon Stone, Diddy, Minnie Driver, Heidi Klum, JC Chasez, Chace Crawford, Len Wiseman, Al Roker, Billy Joel, Chris Noth, Chris O'Donnell, Christian Slater, Faye Dunaway, Tara Reid and Zoe Saldana.

[Photo Credit: Getty Images and Wire Image]

Oscars 2008: Top Seven Most Cringeworthy Ensembles

Molly Friedman — Mon, 25 Feb 2008 09:00:01 PST

Sad news for any schadenfreude addicts out there, but there was nary a swan head nor a peek of butt floss out to be seen on the carpet last night. Instead, we saw 80s-esque gold glitter fiascos (Faye Dunaway), billowy black muumuus (Ellen Page) and particularly poor choices in fabric, especially for a former stripper (Diablo!). While there aren't any oh-no-she-didn't moments, we were disappointed in several of the carpet walkers this evening:

7. Ellen Page: On the biggest night of her short career, we're happy she didn't go with jeans, but couldn't she have gone one step up on the glamour meter?
6. Jennifer Hudson: Not quite as bad as last year's python-y jacket combo, but can't she keep those funbags from attacking us on sight?
5. Marlee Matlin: Just eh, you know? Stiff tube dress in black and white? Go for pizazz to match the personality!

4. Diablo Cody: Oh dear. The diamond collar, the leopard print, the visible tattoos. Kudos for daring Academy members to Take Notice and all, but an animal print dress will always be an animal print dress: tackiness exemplified.
3. Sissy Spacek: Sissy isn't yet old enough to require Oprah-esque jacket cover-ups. We suspect those arms of hers are toned enough to show off.
2. Tilda Swinton: Like Cate Blanchett, Tilda likes taking fashion risks. But a velvety black curtain paired with barely-there makeup? New addition to the Addams Family.

1. Faye Dunaway: Reminiscent of Cher and Barbara Streisand at their most bizarre, we at least give her credit for not flashing her tush.

You know the story: White Witch meets Centaur ...

Seth — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 16:28:25 PST

You know the story: White Witch meets Centaur 18 years her junior, is instantly smitten, and begins popping up in public with him, most recently at the BAFTA Awards. Only thing is, there's a King, 20 years her senior, with whom she has 10-year-old twins. King seems to be OK with Centaur. Centaur seems to be OK with King. Everyone shacks up at the castle, and tongues wag alongside Oscar red carpets, whispering, "Ohmigod! That's the boytoy half of Tilda Swinton's modern domestic arrangement!" [dailymail.co.uk]