Pat O'Brien No Longer Into Screaming Chicks, More Into Salty Chips

Who was that tall hobo you pitied grazing the munchie section of Gelson's the other day? Why, it was none other than recently rehabbed Pat O'Brien, fresh from his stint in rehab for what he and his rep liked to call "problems with alcohol." The bright-eyed and bushy-faced talking head was seen loading up on Pringles and M&Ms (does he have the munchies, too?). However, when a fan recognized him standing in line, he decided to bolt rather than stick around to see what was on her mind:

"At one point he was at the deli waiting for his number to be called, when a woman recognized him and started the whole "Oh my God," thing. Pat wanted no part of it and just bailed."

Sally Struthers Doesn't Mind Being Photographed, No Matter How She Looks

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Defamer Debuts 'Dirt Sandwich', Your Weekly Romp Through Trashy Tabloid TV

There once was a land — a magical land — where a squarejawed titan named John Tesh and a leggy vixen named Mary Hart reigned supreme. Together, they blazed a pioneering trail in which the worlds of journalism and entertainment converged into 30 minutes of televised bliss each and every weeknight. But much like other creations that were born of the purest intentions (think: The Coreys, Britney Spears and Napster), copycat competitors soon entered the fray and everything quickly turned to shit.

Today, the state of celebrity infotainment is at a crossroads, a crossroads at which the likes of Harvey Levin, Billy Bush and Mark McGrath are honored as the Father, Son and Unholy Ghost of the genre. As new celeb-centric shows spring up with greater regularity than lesions on Paris Hilton's nether regions, we here at Defamer are proud to present a new weekly video feature that we are calling Dirt Sandwich. Culled together by Intrepid Defamer Videographer™ Molly McAleer, each episode will place an unforgiving spotlight on the week's lowest and highest moments (which, as you'll soon discover, are often one and the same). Enjoy!

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We were just going to let the e-mail blast above speak for itself, but we know you're going to ask, so: There's so far been no indication we're going to get a sequel to the infamous Let's Go Crazy voicemails of 2005. You may now return to your usual Friday afternoon, non-rehab-announcement-related activities.

• The Insider [theinsideronline.com]

Larry Birkhead Refuses To Let Pesky 'Insider' Cameras Stop His 17-Month Old Daughter From Grieving

Larry Birkhead and integrity go together like peanut butter and mayonnaise. While we have never held him in anything even remoting approaching regard, we think that this clip might one day go down as his lowest moment. That goes for those creeps over at The Insider, too. This clip of Birkhead trotting out Dannielynn to the Bahamian gravesite where her mother is buried repulses us on more levels than we care to count. But we'll try.