Defamer: stop

She's Still Smiling, You Guys

Douglas Reinhardt — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 12:00:00 PDT

Everybody's' favorite Brenda 2.0, AKA Shenae Grimes, remained all smiles while filming on the set of the hit CW series yesterday. When asked about why she appears to be so happy, Grimes replied, "The show is a hit! I get to work with Gangy! I'm up for the role of Bristol Palin in a Lifetime movie! Why not smile? Everything is coming up Shenae these days!"

[Photo Credit: INF Daily]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

'90210': Meet the New Brenda, Who Can't. Stop. Smiling!

Kyle Buchanan — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 09:10:00 PDT

Perhaps you've heard, but a little show called 90210 premiered last night on the CW (to record ratings) and nobody is happier about it than lead actress Shenae Grimes, the smilingest girl who ever smiled. Though she's ostensibly playing the show's Brenda Walsh archetype, Grimes eschewed Shannen Doherty's near-goth hauteur to deliver two hours of the biggest, widest, most non-stop smiling since Denise Richards grinned her way through Starship Troopers. With the help of videographer Molly McAleer, we've assembled a montage of Grimes compulsively flashing those pearly whites; whether she's flirting with the school bad boy, bantering with a terrifyingly well-preserved Lori Loughlin, or wondering, "Gee, doesn't this high school seem like it came out of a generic Anytown, USA rather than a truly decadent Beverly Hills," Grimes simply can't stop beaming. Shenae, we're sorry — but like bad-girl blogger Silver, we're simply speaking the truth. Don't worry, we're still BFF's. Catch you at The Pit? [The CW]

Is A Helicopter Really That Necessary? I'm Just Trying To Do Some Crunches In Peace

Douglas Reinhardt — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 12:45:00 PDT

boomp3.com

Stop-Loss star Ryan Phillippe's afternoon exercise was interrupted by a helicopter flying high above his Hollywood Hills home. Phillippe tried yelling at the copter, but his plea for privacy was drowned out by the whoosh of the whirling blades. Phillippe retreated inside his home, but quickly returned a few moments with an assortment of poster board and a large magic marker. Phillippe furiously scribbled a message on the poster board then held it up to the sky. The cards read:

-"Please Leave Me Alone"
-"Isn't Lindsay Lohan Maybe Holding Hands With That DJ Lady Somewhere?"
-"Or Isn't Madonna Cheating Somewhere With A.Rod?"
-"Seriously! Go Away! What Did I Do To Deserve This?"
-"And No, You Can't Say I Know What You Did Last Summer Either."

[Photo Credit: X17]

Reese And Ryan Finally Get Around To Signing Those Pesky Divorce Papers

Molly Friedman — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 15:30:00 PDT

Today’s news that Ryan Phillippe and Reese Witherspoon’s seven-year long marriage has just now “officially” ended invites all kinds of speculation on just why it took nearly two years for the divorce proceedings to finalize. Citing “irreconcilable differences” all the way back in 2006, the blonde duo split amid speculation that Ryan’s bad boy behavior ranged from publicly making out with current girlfriend Abbie Cornish on the Texas set of Stop Loss to an increasing level of resentment regarding his wife’s fast-rising star status. And while celebrity divorces do typically take longer than usual, considering how many more properties, cars, adultery allegations and cash they tend to have, we find the timing of this particular pair’s final John Hancocks a little suspicious given the past month's unusually abundant Reese-and-Ryan gossip flood. Is today’s news just a coincidence, or did each party's very public pictorial statements recently have anything to do with it?

As we had the pleasure of witnessing last month, Jake and Reese made one of their most public and skin-revealing appearances on the beach, with Reese all smiles in her itty bitty blue bikini, and Jake's impressive upper body on sunny display. And in a possible revenge ploy, Ryan agreed to accompany Abbie to an Australian awards ceremony, marking their first red carpet appearance as an official couple. Of course, it's basically public knowledge by now that Ryan took the divorce far harder than Reese, judging by his many weepy quotes about suicide and "vomiting" over the years, and Reese put Ryan in check mate first with those lovey dovey beach photos. No matter how many meetings, lawyers and arguments over child custody have taken place over the years, these pictures were apparently worth a thousand words.

REESE WITHERSPOON AND RYAN PHILLIPPE FINALIZE THEIR DIVORCE [Us]

Ryan Phillippe Reclaims Manhood, Poses For Revenge Photo With Reese Witherspoon's Arch Enemy

Molly Friedman — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 16:40:00 PDT

Poor Ryan Phillippe. First, he earned a reputation as a shameful cheating husband who hurt the precious piece of Oscar-winning apple pie that is Reese Witherspoon, then gay-basher-turned-gay-lover Jay Leno urged Ryan to look “gay” on national television, and then his role in Stop Loss failed to live up to expectations. Rubbing salt into an already open wound, he admitted to USA Today last week that he avoids looking at pictures of Reese and Jake Gyllenhaal, calling the images “bizarre.” But last night, Phillippe finally battled this ongoing string of bad luck and publicly appeared at an Australian awards gala with "other woman" Abbie Cornish on his arm. We took a look back at all the hiding these two have done over the years, and what may have inspired Ryan to show the media he’s no longer in need of a pity party.

In late 2006, the pair were snapped hundreds of times on the set of Stop Loss, but the pictures hardly compared to those paparazzi shots of Ryan and Abbie literally "necking" in December last year. And despite the optimism behind Stop Loss failing to move money at the B.O., those who did buy a ticket would have noticed the obvious chemistry between the couple on-screen. Considering the fact that Jake and Reese were very publicly photographed in their itty bitty beach clothes just weeks ago, Ryan's decision to finally flash his mug next to Abbie's Down Under hints at an interesting case of one-upmanship by way of the paparazzi. Anything Reese can do, Ryan can do better!

[Photo credits: NYDN, Yuddy Hush, Getty]

RYAN PHILLIPPE STEPS OUT WITH ABBIE CORNISH [People]

Conservative Film Scholar Concerned That Iraq-Based Films Are 'Relentless Downers', Would Prefer More Iraqi Ass-Kicking

STV — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 10:00:13 PDT

Our condolences go out this morning to Paramount, whose sulky, twangy, denim-and-rippling-flesh marketing push for Stop-Loss couldn't trick weekend moviegoers into checking out yet another Iraq War message movie. At Defamer HQ, the search for answers behind the disappointing $4.5 million gross — too many muscle shirts? Ryan Phillippe/Abbie Cornish babymaking rumors peaked too soon? — extended to the conservative journal Men's News Daily, where crack industry analyst Greg Strange's devastating Monday-morning hindsight is sharper than ever:

When are these filmmakers going to connect the dots? Do they really think this is what American audiences want to see? It may well be that the majority of Americans wish we had never gotten into this war, but that doesn't mean they want to see the country's finest young people depicted as rapists, murderers or even just run-of-the-mill, psychologically damaged basket cases returning from combat. ...

It's all very noble in an artistic kind of way, but if they keep it up, some of them may soon be seen on the street holding signs that say "Will make antiwar films for food."

Indeed, this "artistic kind of way" of doing things is thoroughly played out, and we stand with Greg Strange in urging an end to creatively addressing social issues in movies. Still, with at least two distinguished auteurs already having hit the sidewalks with hat in hand and cow on corner (not to mention conservative firebrand Vincent Gallo establishing himself as a bona-fide eBay Gigolo&trade), we also endorse the burgeoning trend in garish, gawk-worthy sidewalk entrepreneurship. Our only hope for reconciling the two: Oliver Stone, whose forthcoming George W. Bush biopic has more cast members than investors, could surely use some right-wing influence to the tune of $30 million. Here's your sign, Ollie, and there's your corner.

Another Iraq war movie, Stop-Loss, headed for dustbin of cinematic history [Men's News Daily]

Breaking: Ryan Phillippe and Abbie Cornish are Expecting (To Put Lawyers on Fox Gossip's Doorstep)!

STV — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 09:26:08 PDT

Resident Fox gossipmonger Roger Friedman outdid himself this morning with the "news" that romantically linked Stop-Loss co-stars Ryan Phillippe and Abbie Cornish are "apparently having a child." You wouldn't know it now, of course, with Friedman's allegation deleted from his copy without any note or citation from his editors at Fox News. Thank goodness for the quick-thinking eagle-eyes at The Huffington Post, who nabbed a screengrab of the offending passage you can spy after the jump.

Yikes! This is quite a difference from the "Abbie Cornish (whom Phillippe is rumored to have romanced)" revision hastily implemented just after HuffPo's item broke. This is what always happens any time Friedman breaks from his beloved, played-out Michael Jackson beat, but hats off to him and the gang at Fox for keeping the class alive by pretending his lies, rumors and innuendo never existed. Though we can't say the same for either star's lawyers, we'll pretend — for the hundredth or so time — that we didn't see that.

[Photo Credit: FilmMagic]

First Reese Witherspoon, Now It's Ryan Phillippe's Turn in 'Stop-Loss' [Fox News]

Are Ryan Phillippe's Abs Enough To Convince Audiences To See An Iraq-Themed Movie?

Molly Friedman — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 16:40:56 PDT

Judging from the TV ads and posters for Stop-Loss, the film looks as if it would be just another teen flick where pretty boys with pretty faces chase some equally pretty girls with equally pretty faces. However, director Kimberly Peirce's first film since Boys Don't Cry is actually a big, serious movie about the plight of soldiers fighting in Iraq. But before you go and tune out the film solely on the basis of it being another one of those dirge-like films, it's worth noting that THR is predicting that this may be the very first movie centered around the War in Iraq that actually breaks through with both critics and audiences:

"The recent boxoffice fate of Iraq movies has prompted Paramount to take a notably careful approach that downplays the war. The movie is being sold as an MTV Films picture with an attractive young cast (Ryan Phillippe, Joseph Gordon-Levitt) that will lure people to theaters for other reasons."

One of those "other reasons"? The chance to see Ryan and rumored marriage breaker-upper Abbie Cornish lust after each other on-screen, a plot line laid on thick in the trailer. Also emphasized are the killer abs of both Phillippe and co-star Channing Tatum. But all this catering to MTV's fan base may not be the dimmest light bulb to go off in a marketer's head. Considering the fates of In The Valley Of Elah ($6.7 million in boxoffice gross), Rendition ($9.7 million) and No End In Sight ($1.4 million), playing up aspects that may appeal to the Us Weekly demographic might just turn out to be a smart move. Even last year's The Kingdom, backed up by non-stop explosions and an A-list cast including Jennifer Garner and Jamie Foxx didn't even crack over $50 million. If abs and tabloid-y love stories are what it takes to get kids in the seats for an Iraq-themed tearjerker, then so be it.

'STOP LOSS' FACES UPHILL BATTLE [THR]
WITH AMERICA AT WAR, HOLLYWOOD FOLLOWS [USA Today]

Japanimators Ensure Britney Spears Has Illustrated Panties On At All Times

Seth — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 18:01:49 PDT

We teased you yesterday with just a few still frames from Britney Spears's new video for "Break The Ice," but we can now premiere the full version in all its uncut, Japanimation glory. (It premiered on something called the blackoutball.com, which you could only access with two secret words, and we would never tell you what those were even if they weren't "danger" and "victory." Oh, darn—we gave it away!) Directed by Robert Hales after Britney watched his Lovestoned clip for Justin Timberlake and specifically requested the director, we're informed that no Louis Vuitton proprietary Cherry Blossom patterns were harmed during production. It looks nothing like her, but it's kind of cool. Enjoy!

blackoutball.com

Pardon Us For Not Getting Too Worked Up About Latest Unbelievable Britney Headline

Molly Friedman — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 09:42:50 PST

One would think that, by now, there would be no more room on the OMG BRITNEY DID ANOTHER CRAZY THING belt. However, this week's Star cover story proves that there is still plenty of space on said belt for another notch or thirty. The rag claims that Britney is pregnant once again with none other than paparazzo-turned-paramour Adnan Ghalib's baby. Yawn! Their evidence? A few pictures of Britney's bloated belly and a sketchy (at best) quote from a member of Ghalib's press-hungry posse who exults that Adnan will "be made for life" if the story proves to be true. Don't hold your breath, homes; we've been down this path a handful of times over the last two months.

For one thing, Britney sporting a minor bloat anywhere near her uterus is neither a confirmation of pregnancy nor what anyone with a sane mind would consider to be "news." Rather, that's just how her body looks these days (besides, after having two children and losing a very public battle with Cheeto addiction, who can blame her?). Additionally, just about everything coming out of her camp of late seems to have very little to do with anything resembling the truth. That rubbish about her getting married to Adnan in a secret ceremony in Mexico? No dice. Brit sending her driver to buy meth in a dark alley? No evidence. So congratulations, Star! You've got yourselves an explosive cover story with the believability quotient of the late, great Weekly World News' Batboy coverage. Best of luck to you with your upcoming "Britney Impregnated At Area 51" exclusive!

EXCLUSIVE: ADNAN: BRITNEY'S HAVING MY BABY! [Star]

Love-Refusing Bachelor Brad Womack Runs The Daytime Talk Show Gaunlet

Mark — Fri, 30 Nov 2007 17:20:24 PST

Remember Brad Womack, the slab of The Bachelor man-beef who ripped out America's heart, doused it in Old Spice, and then set the still-beating organ aflame by failing to pretend he'd fallen for either of the two contestants who'd survived weeks of televised culling? Of course you do. That stuff only happened a week ago! Anyway: after giving him the what-for on yesterday's program, today Ellen DeGeneres invited Womack to her show so that should could get some fucking answers to questions she felt weren't adequately addressed during the post-finale interrogation that repeatedly stole the breath of a studio audience scandalized by his inability to let love heal his tortured soul.

To his credit, Womack rose to the challenge, even knowing that his hunky, lunkheaded charms—or, in a pinch, the mesmerizing removal of his shirt for a peek at his Strip-O-Gram-quality abs—would be of no use against this particular inquisitor. Watch the clip, then head off into your weekend with a marginally greater degree of closure than you had three-and-a-half minutes ago.

The Ellen DeGeneres Show [ellen.warnerbos.com]
Previously: 'The Bachelor' Made To Answer For His Crimes Against TV Love [Defamer]