”He was wearing his stupid farmer's boots, a lumberjack shirt and looking like the country bumpkin from the Midwest that he really always was. And he left, shaking his head, and I never had to see him again.”

How the two came together in the first place, and what might have scared the poor guy away, after the jump:

According to Scacchi, who you may remember only for her many nude roles in The Red Violin and Heat And Dust (and, obvs, her role as the Ice Queen that tantalized Griffin Mill in The Player), she met Murray at a casting meeting for an undisclosed film in which the two are apparently slated to play each other's love interest. And Scacchi claims Murray openly requested her phone number to prove to the rest of the crew that their on-screen heat would be realistic should they play it out off-screen as well. See Hollywood Ethics 101 for why this is perfectly reasonable. In any case, Murray agreed to meet Greta at her apartment where Greta had invited "an eclectic collection of friends...cooking, playing music, dancing, all completely stoned. He just sat on a sofa, out of his depth." Frankly, we don't care how sexy Scacchi used to look, but we're on Team Murray: that scene is far too 70s for our taste, and we'd leave those faux bohos in the pot-scented dust just like he did.

[Photo Credits: Getty Images]

• BILL MURRAY IN TOO DEEP AT GRETA SCACCHI'S [London Telegraph]

As you have probably gathered by now, your Uncle Grambo was fortunate enough to be one of the lucky 250 or so people who got to watch this weekend's episode of SNL (host: Shia LaBeouf, musical guest: My Morning Jacket) from the friendly confines of Studio 8H at Rockefeller Center. A full run-down of the evening follows after the jump.

We arrived in the building around 10:15pm, just about 75 minutes before the show officially commences. As you walk in the lobby of 30 Rock, there are dozens (if not hundreds) of people lined up behind velvet ropes along the walls, many of whom look as if they have spent the majority of the day waiting in line for tickets. Fortunately, thanks to the good graces of the NBC PR department, we were able to walk straight in, save for a short conversation with the keepers of the magical guest list. Let me tell you, it was quite hilarious watching a slew of people approach these staffers and attempt to namedrop their way into the show (our favorite attempt was when one young blonde lass tried to use the "My brother is a lawyer at NBC" line). As we waited our turn to go up the elevators up to Studio 8H, we found ourselves standing next to one Suze Orman, whose teeth are even more blazingly white when you see them up close and personal (little did we know at the time, but SNL MVP Kristen Wiig would do an amazing impression of her later in the show).

Our press escort popped out of the elevator bank at approximately 10:40pm and scooted us upstairs. As you walk from the elevator bank to the studio, you stroll down a long hallway that is lined with framed photographs of the litany of SNL cast members who once populated these very same halls. Seeing the faces of Bill Murray, Chevy Chase, Mike Myers, Gilda Radner and Eddie Murphy, you can't help but feel like you are small part of a grand tradition of comedic greatness. As you make your way closer and closer to the stage, you encounter various levels of security. If memory serves, we had to show three different sets of security/PR people along the way. And while we were handed both wristbands and tickets when we walked in, the most important credential we had all evening was, surprisingly, the envelope that the tickets came in. As for why, not sure we'll ever know.

After a few minutes of waiting around (perhaps the ushers were cleaning up the popcorn from the aisles?), we were taken to our seats just after 11pm. We sat in the back row of the studio, which was actually the fourth row of what I'll affectionately call the "upper deck" (meaning, not the swivel chairs you see on the floor while watching the show). We were directly in line with the main stage where Shia LaBeouf would deliver his monologue some forty minutes later.

We sat next to an affable hippie and his son, the elder of whom explained to us that he worked on a number on the "fake commercials" that SNL has shot over the years. But just when I was about to ask him if he was present for the filming of the legendary Schmitt's Gay spot, I noticed that Claire Danes, of all people, was walking down the aisle towards me. She was accompanied by her slight of stature BF, Hugh Dancy, and another friend was not famous. She looked far skinnier than I remembered her from her last on-screen role, Stardust, and her hair looked exceedingly thin. That said, there is no denying that she is straight up gorge. After all, it's not everyday you look Angela Chase right in the eyes.

As my heart rate returned to normal, my attention shifted to the flurry of activity down below our seats on the set. As Lenny Pickett and the Saturday Night Live Band warmed up the crowd with a number of R&B standards, stagehands were running around putting last minute touches on the various set decorations. Occasionally, the venerable Lorne Michaels would pop his head out, look around, and duck back beneath the set (presumably to tweak the skits from the dress rehears performance). With approximately 10 minutes left before showtime, Don Pardo wandered out onto center stage to begin warming the crowd up. He was quickly followed by Jason Sudeikis, who explained the rules of the road to the audience ("Be sure to laugh your asses off!") and cracked a few jokes, all the while wearing orange-accented hi-tops and Kansas Jayhawks basketball shorts.

Then, in a totally unexpected turn of events, Kristen Wiig and Fred Armisen joined the band for a rousing performance of Blondie's "One Way Or Another." Wiig played the part of Deborah Harry amazingly well; not only was her voice crackin', but she had the Harry hip sway down pat. Meanwhile, Fred Armisen turned in a very serviceable Chris Stein impression, shredding on the electric guitar in such an impressive fashion that I almost forgot he used to be a drummer and not a guitarist. As soon as the song wrapped up, the house lights began to dim.

As the stagehands rolled a faux presidential backdrop onto the main stage and turned on a lamp that was sitting next to a formal chair, Amy Poehler emerged dressed as Hillary Clinton for the evening's cold open (I would later learn that the audience at the dress rehearsal saw a different cold open, one that took place at DNC headquarters). As she quickly reviewed the cue cards, Lorne Michaels approached her and knelt down to give her a quick and quiet pep talk. This was my favorite moment of the evening; although Lorne has a bit of a rep for being enigmatic when it comes to his relationships with the cast members, there was something in his body language and the way that he approached Poehler that radiated a very fatherly and caring vibe. It was something you would never see on television, but somehow, it spoke volumes about how close-knit the SNL family truly is.

And from there, the rest of the show was, at least for me, a blur. If I were to note one thing about seeing the show live and in person that you don't see when you watch on TV, it would be how frenetically paced things are on-set. The very second the red light goes off on a camera, crew members are tearing down sets and physically grabbing cast members. In particular, after Shia LaBeouf's monologue, a woman came bounding at him from off-stage and literally TORE the suit coat off his back as she pushed him backstage for a costume change (he appeared as a Doug Henning-esque magician about 45 seconds later in a slightly puzzling "Match Game" spoof). Despite the hectic pace,there was never a moment where the set even approached chaos (controlled or otherwise); rather, all of the on-stage hustle seemed to radiate a thoroughly professional vibe.

It's also worth noting that, despite the frenetic pace, we saw nary a frown or disgruntled look on any of the cast or crew members' faces. Instead, smiles abounded everywhere you looked during the commercial breaks. If the performers were tired or stressed out, they certainly didn't show it.

There was one other interesting factoid from the evening that stood out. In the sketch where Bill Hader plays Vinnie Vedecci, the Italian talk show host with a penchant for smoking multiple cigarettes during the course of his celebrity interviews, one crew member drew the assignment of smoking the cigarettes that he would hand to Bill Hader in-between shots. He seemed to relish this job, as he chain-smoked his way through half of four cigarettes during the course of the sketch. Also, throughout this entire bit, both Fred Armisen and Will Forte sat on the side of the stage, where the camera would occasionally cut to them. As a part of the skit, they were both eating a bowl of spaghetti. Whereas Fred Armisen mostly twirled the spaghetti around with his fork, Will Forte ate almost the entire portion of pasta that was sitting in front of him during the course of the sketch. Looks like someone skipped their dinner!

The skit we chose to bring you above was the last sketch of the evening. Although both Kristen Wiig and Kenan Thompson were the evening's stand-out performers, it was Amy Poehler's performance as a mom who wanted to ensure her children were dressed as "New York Funky" as possible that made us (and the rest of the audience) laugh the hardest.

Then, just as quickly as it began, the 90-minute show came to a close. After watching Shia wish everyone a happy Mother's Day, we walked out into the lobby, where we noticed a VERY gorgeous (and sober looking) Tatum O'Neal holding court with a few friends and cast members. We debated going up to her to say hello, but instead decided to make our way to the elevators. We met up with a few friends who just so happened to be at the taping, too, and headed off into the night, feeling exhilarated after what could only be described as a truly special evening. Regardless of what you think of the show, after witnessing everything that goes down in between skits and commercial breaks up close and in person, there is no denying that the people who put SNL together are some of the hardest working people in television.

Be sure to tune in next week for the Season Finale of the Saturday Night Live's 33rd season. The host is Steve Carell and the musical guest will be Usher.

boomp3.com

A TSA agent drunk on power attempted to place Saturday Night Live performer Andy Samberg into his own private rendition. The security agent mentioned that he wrote a spec script that Samberg would be perfect for and that he also wanted to get Samberg's feedback on some characters he's been developing in his improv classes. Samberg looked around the janitorial closet and said that is pretty illegal, but might make for a "totally sweet" digital short.

[Photo Credit: Bauer-Griffin]

"'Chippendales' was a weird sketch. I always hated it...The joke of it is, basically, 'We can't hire you because you're fat.' There's no comic twist to it. It's just [bleep]ing mean. Chris wanted so much to be liked. As funny as that sketch was...it's one of the things that killed him."

As the NYDN reports, SNL writer Bob Odenkirk called him "totally nuts." But that's the least of it. Former cast member Norm McDonald reveals that after Farley was let go from the show, he felt so low that he'd taken to bringing prostitutes "to dinner and treat them so sweetly. He'd introduce them to you as his girlfriend." Producer Lorne Michaels has repeatedly compared Farley to his predecessor John Belushi, who died at the same age of 33, under remarkably similar circumstances: after going on a drug-infused bender with a strange woman, he was left alone to die after injecting speedballs.

When asked to compare Farley to John Belushi in an interview with TV Guide, Lorne explained:

"John was physical, but he could do remarkable impressions. He could do very deep character work, and I think that he found much more of his talent. Chris, he just didn't get the chance...He perhaps romanticized what he thought was John, the way John lived."

[Photo credit: Getty]

• CHRIS FARLEY'S DARK COMEDY [NYDN]

• Saturday Night Live [NBC]

"I got a lot of s - - - at the end about 'Why weren't you there for him?' But being that close, I dealt with it all the time. And in that situation, before the guy's dead, he's just kind of an a - -hole. Truth is, you get a junkie who's wasted all the time and moody and angry and trying to knock you around, you say, 'OK, you go do that, and I'll be over here.' "

Chevy Chase, meanwhile, took a tough love stance, dressing Farley down as only a reputed narcissist could:

"Look, you're not John Belushi. And when you overdose or kill yourself, you will not have the same acclaim that John did . . . You'll be a blip in the New York Times obituaries page, and that'll be it. Is that what you want?"

• CHRIS FARLEY AND HIS DAYS OF HELL [NY Post]

"Timberlake's attempts at humor flopped, and breaking into a falsetto sing-songy funnyvoice after botching a scripted line didn't help...When he finished, the NSYNCsman was asked by one of the producers if he 'felt good about the speech.' 'Yeah. I mean, how is everyone else's [speech]?' Timberlake replied nervously."

We're actually quite saddened to hear this news, mainly because we so thoroughly enjoyed nearly every pitch-perfect second of his 2005 hosting duties on Saturday Night Live. There was the super competitive hot dog, the Target employee with a chapstick addiction, and the dead-on revenge-impersonation of Ashton Kutcher swiveling out of his mind on Punk'd. And then, in his December 2006 return, there was that digital short that had everyone under the age of 80 extolling the virtues of dicks in boxes. So what happened? We guess JT is only as funny as the cue cards the SNL staff has written for him. Oh well, at least this won't hurt his budding film prospects playing Very Serious roles.

• JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE STRUGGLES WITH HUMOR AT THE ROCK 'N ROLL HALL OF FAME INDUCTION [Radar Online]

MM: How did you wind up on SNL?
CW: I always wanted to be on the show since I was little and I couldn't audition for the past couple years because I was under contract with other pilots and stuff. Basically I just said to my managers and agents that I really wanted to audition, and I admit that I had to say that a couple times (laughs) but, then I put together a tape. My roommate was very helpful. I just did a ten character tape... it was pretty low budg... I sent it in and I was waiting to hear, I heard they kind of liked it and I knew they were looking for women but the strike was going on so it was kind of weird timing. In December, they called and said Lorne [Michaels] wants to meet with you. In January, they flew me out for auditions. I was practicing at UCB, and I had kind of emailed with [cast members] Amy Poehler and Kristen Wiig about kind of what it would be like. Amy is obviously the head of UCB and an idol of mine, essentially. Then, three weeks later, Lorne flew out to LA for something and he told me then.

MM: Tina Fey is hosting this week, which must be really huge for you. What can we expect from the show?
CW: Well, one thing that's fun is that, you'll see, I think, hopefully they don't get cut... A lot of uhhh ... lady sketches. A lot of things with all the gals in it, which is really really fun. Basically, my mind is completely being blown that I'm getting to do something with Tina Fey, Amy Poehler and Kristen Wiig, who are in my mind the absolute funniest women in comedy right now. I don't know where or why it's ended up that I'm allowed to act with them, but I am having so much fun.

Lady sketches, you say? Sounds saucy! With reports circulating that this will be both Amy Poehler and Maya Rudolph's last season on the show, we're just as glad to see that Lorne is committed to putting more fresh female performers on the show as we are to see Casey Wilson's debut. Don't forget, SNL returns tomorrow night, February 23, with host Tina Fey and musical guest Carrie Underwood.

• Saturday Night Live [NBC]

While Shia LaBeouf and Steve Carell are committed for May (to plug Indiana Jones and Get Smart, respectively), all the formerly committed winter guests are no longer available. The biggest loss of all was Amy Winehouse, who was set to appear on the episode right before the strike. However, chances aren't good that she will be rebooked; as Michaels ominously put it, "I don't think anyone can put that back together." As for the writers and how they're handling the pressure, Seth Meyers and his self-professed "wisecrack circle," are apparently in the best shape they've ever been in thanks to the writers strike and all that muscle-building picketing. Oh and "not having money for food."

'SNL' IS READY TO MAKE UP FOR LOST TIME [NY Times]