Defamer: rumer willis

RumerWatch. Whore star Rumer Willis gets ...

Seth — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 17:00:00 PDT

RumerWatch. Whore star Rumer Willis gets more work! She's been cast in an episode of Lifetime's Army Wives set to air October 12, in which she'll play "the wife of a soldier who has been injured in Iraq." Congratulations, Rumer Willis! [TV Guide]

'Whore' The 'Citizen Kane' Of Streetwalker Movies Starring Megan Fox And Rumer Willis

Seth — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 14:00:00 PDT

There are those for whom the title Whore means one film and one alone: Ken Russell's fearless exploration of the oldest profession, in which Richard Gere never arrives to sweep a gold-hearted streetwalker off her feet. But that was 1991, a whole generation ago, and few who show up to 2008's Whore are likely to even recall the original, much less force a comparison. Written, directed, produced, edited and color-timed by Thomas Dekker—yes, that Thomas Dekker, of John Connor-in-primetime fame and The Sashay Chante Chronicles—it features Megan Fox, Rumer Willis, and Ron Jeremy in a movie about a "large group of teens living on the streets of Hollywood and selling their bodies to stay alive." We present for you the key art, the arresting image of a bitch who had to be choked, presumably by uncredited cameo Wayne Brady.

Whore Is A Real Movie Starring Megan Fox And Rumer Willis [Videogum]

Schoolyard Chants Of 'Rumer, Rumer, Big Hairy Tumor' Reveal Ugly Side Of Eccentric Celebrity Baby-Naming

Seth — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 10:25:00 PDT

As if second-generation Hollywood underdog Rumer Willis doesn't have enough to contend with living in the long shadows of her dazzlingly successful biological parents and a stepfather three years her junior, there's also those little life-obstacles thrown at her that could have just as easily been avoided. To wit: her name, one of the earliest and most egregious examples of the eccentric-celebrity-baby-naming trend that gripped the industry in the '90s and has yet to show any signs of letting up. We point as evidence towards such recent additions to the Weird Celebrity Baby-Name Registry as Sunday Kidman-Urban, Honor Alba-Warren, Birdie Phillipps (daughter of Freaks and Geeks star Busy), and the unabashedly onomatopoeic Phlbbbbbbfffft Simpson, the not-yet-born offspring of mother Ashlee. From Page Six:

RUMER Willis used to hate her name. The daughter of Demi Moore and Bruce Willis tells this Sunday's Page Six Magazine that when she was 12, she realized she "got screwed."

My sisters, Scout and Talullah, had cute nicknames," she says. "When I was 12 and had crushes on guys, I'd put my first name with their last name, but it never sounded right. Rumer Depp? Nope. In school, kids would sing, 'Rumer, Rumer with a big hairy tumor.' " She also says she was shocked to be named one of People's 100 Most Beautiful People this year: "After being compared to Jay Leno for so long, you don't think of yourself in that way."

Let this be a cautionary tale to all you expecting celebrity parents. We realize children can be cruel, but really now: "Rumer, Rumer with a big hairy tumor?" And as if that weren't enough, Willis had to withstand comparisons to Jay Leno, the late night talk show equivalent of a benign, hirsute growth. Talullah didn't know how easy she had it, with a name almost impossible to rhyme with anything suitably humiliating. ("Talullah, Talullah, with all that Die Hard 2 Moolah!")

BLAME MY NAME [Page Six]

Rumer Willis Latches Onto Potato Sack Dress Fad

Douglas Reinhardt — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 15:55:00 PDT

Never one miss out on a trend, Rumer Willis became the latest celebrity to don an amorphous potato sack dress while out shopping in New York City. The House Bunny star felt the shapeless outfit leaves a lot to imagination while still being fashionable and wearable. Willis said, "So many guys are just dying to look down your shirt and this outfit prevents them. You can't get this milk for free. Oh no. Dinner at Dan Tana's, then it'll become a maybe."

[Photo Credit: Splash Pic]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

Shockingly, Rumer Willis Fails To Seduce Chace Crawford

Molly Friedman — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 12:20:00 PDT

When a girl's starting to doubt her sex appeal, after a foray into acting that has thus far earned her parts as a back brace-wearing nerd and the part of "Smoking Girl" in something called Whore, there is no better way to regain confidence and prove just how fine you are than nailing a gay actor (allegedly). And that's just the challenge Rumer Willis set up for herself during a recent night out. According to the NY Post, the rising starlet and failed auditonee of Lindsay Lohan's lesbian love lottery spotted boy band groupie Chace Crawford at a birthday party and tried every boy toy magnet trick she could think of in an extensively planned and bitterly fought campaign to pull off the rarely accomplished task of getting him to switch teams.

Though the Gossip Girl pretty boy has already doused gossip pages with gay rumors, Willis was allegedly gung-ho about grabbing the goldilock-ed birthday boy's attention. But instead of smartly following in his co-star Blake Lively's footsteps and donning a trustworthy bikini inspired by her own mother, Rumer thought a pair of her "shortest jean shorts" and impressive dance floor shenanigans would do the trick. Sadly, sources say Crawford was less interested in both her and Z-lister Brittny Gastineau's forays in conversion tactics: "He wouldn't give her the time of day." A sad moment indeed, but we do suggest Willis try her method out on Crawford's partner in fruitini-drinking crime JC Chasez, who, judging from our tipster's report months back, is much more interested in hiding his sexual preferences behind cabana doors.

[Photo credits: Getty, Wireimage]

WOMEN COMPETING FOR CHACE CRAWFORD AT HIS BIRTHDAY [NYP]

Now, Maybe My Parents Will Finally Pay Attention To Me

Douglas Reinhardt — Wed, 21 May 2008 12:50:00 PDT

boomp3.com

Celebrity offspring Rumer Willis attempted to cause a scene on the mean streets on Winnipeg, Canada. Willis coughed and hacked her way through cigarette after cigarette, hoping that one of her near by handlers/assistants would inform her parents about her new and disgusting habit. After getting dizzy and nearly passing out, Willis gave up on smoking as an attention grabber. Then she briefly considered taking embarrassing and scandalous photos of herself and posting them onto the internet, but Willis then realized that it still wouldn't get her parents attention.

[Photo Credit: Flynet]

Nothing Eases The Stress Of Having A Rebellious Starlet Daughter Like A Good Penis Piercing

Molly Friedman — Thu, 01 May 2008 13:20:00 PDT

Not a day goes by without a dozen blind items stirring up rumors about the newest Hollywood heroin addict or closeted anchor with sex swings in his office, but there is one very rare kind of bold face name-less rumor that catches our eye. And it has to do with "celebrity dads," "piercings," and "nether regions." As the NY Post Just Asks this morning:

Which celebrity dad is just as rebellious as his starlet daughter? The troubled parent wears a ring through a piercing on his nether regions.

After the jump, we present our top five suspects, their odds, and invite you to place your bets.

Hulk Hogan: Low on the list, only because Brooke hasn't quite reached "starlet" or "rebellious" levels of fame yet.
Jamie Spears: Britney has publicly outed her dad as a former drug user, and we can't think of a father/daughter pair who are more "troubled" at the moment, but somehow Jamie doesn't strike us as the manhood-piercing type.
Michael Lohan: He is a wild card, but he's also some kind of born-again missionary. We don't know much about born-agains, but we doubt they frequent piercing parlors too often.

Lionel Richie: Lionel's the kind of guy we could picture spontaneously deciding to stick some jewels in those nether regions of his. But Nicole's no longer causing him any grief, and we can't find any reason why the crooner would be "troubled" at the moment.
Bruce Willis: Most likely suspect. Rumer's rebellious, Bruce is floundering, and he's a bad ass dude. How else to prove to his extended family that Ashton will never, ever be the man he is? A pierced Segel is the obvious answer.

[Photo credits: Getty, Rob's Blog, NYDN]

JUST ASKING [NY Post]

Rumer Willis Works Hard To Emulate Demi Moore, But Do Extensions And Bikini Bodies A Superstar Make?

Molly Friedman — Wed, 30 Apr 2008 09:50:00 PDT

It took her long enough, but the eldest spawn of Bruce Willis and Demi Moore is finally putting her pedigree to good use. Rumer Willis reminded the world of her burgeoning acting career at last week's premiere of From Within, the horror flick she's starring in, and was spotted posing for her first ad campaign for Wal-Mart's newest surfer fashion brand OP (formerly Ocean Pacific). And while the extensions she wore for the premiere coupled with the bikini body she displayed alongside Pete Wentz for the photo shoot do admittedly evoke memories of a younger version of her iconic mom, are Rumer's recent career choices really going to jumpstart a Demi-like fame trajectory? Or will she soon be on MTV's third season of Rock The Cradle?

While Wal-Mart isn't nearly as highbrow as Versace, the fashion brand Demi modeled for in 2005, Moore was actually a hard-working model aching for a big break at 18. Rumer, now 19, is hardly struggling, and Wal-Mart, as Hilary Duff and the Olsen sisters know fully well, bring in major bucks.

And landing the role in From Within may not win Rumer any Oscar nods, but Moore didn't really break out until landing a recurring role on General Hospital at 20. So despite cheesy ad campaigns and teen romp scary movies serving as the first credits on her resume, Rumer may surprise us all and manage to live up to her mother's decades-long star status. Fingers crossed she doesn't take on any implant-requiring lap dance roles for the time being, though. Lindsay Lohan may be the only ticket-buyer.

[Photo credits: Getty, Wireimage, Flisted]

NOW BIKINI-CLAD RUMER WILLIS RECREATES MOTHER DEMI'S FAMOUS CHARLIE'S ANGELS BEACH SCENE [Daily Mail]
RUMER WILLIS FOR WAL-MART'S OP BRAND [Just Jared]

Goth Talk With Rumer Willis

Douglas Reinhardt — Wed, 19 Mar 2008 17:55:30 PDT

boomp3.com

The much maligned celebuspawn Rumer Willis attempted unsuccessfully to get into Hollywood club Villa after hearing a rumor about a special Goth themed party featuring a Bauhaus cover band last night. Feeling semi-defeated, Willis then retreated to the Stevie Nicks fan club meeting at a nearby Starbucks.

[Photo Credit: X17]

Hollywood Foreign Press Rewards Rumer Willis For Being Demi And Bruce's Daughter

Mark — Wed, 14 Nov 2007 15:54:57 PST

Congratulations are in order for actress/scenester/pre-achievement semicelebrity Rumer Willis, who earlier today was crowned Miss Golden Globe 2008, the single highest honor the Hollywood Foreign Press Association can bestow upon the female, teenage progeny of an internationally recognizable performer whose staggering success is unlikely to be replicated by his or her pampered offspring.

Though there was nothing he could do to completely dispel the faint whiff of inevitable career shortfall that hangs over each annual coronation ceremony, HFPA president Jorge Camara did imbue the event with an extra soupcon of hope by reminding the assembled press that Willis, as a slightly rarer Double Miss Golden Globe—a product of the magical acts of star-on-star sexual congress that strengthen royal Tinseltown bloodlines too often diluted by one nonfamous gene-donor—she'll always enjoy the added advantage of having two parents (not to mention a generous and supportive step-Kutcher) who can call in casting favors for as long as she decides to keep chasing her probably unattainable Hollywood dreams.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Rumer Willis Selected As 2008 Miss Golden Globe [HFPA.org]

When Freelance Bodyguards And Paparazzi Clash, TMZ Is There

Mark — Thu, 12 Jul 2007 09:13:30 PDT

Not long after dodging D-lister-piercing ordinance in the hot zone outside of the Roosevelt Hotel, TMZ.com's utterly fearless Starcatcher mobile video team once again found themselves knee-deep in the shit last night, documenting a vicious brawl that erupted outside an ESPYs afterparty at Skybar when a pair of gentlemen decided to audition for Rumer Willis bodyguard duty by engaging some paparazzi in hand-to-hand combat.

Fortunately, no gunplay was involved this time, but the photographer who caught the worst of the beating "was treated for three cracked ribs, a possibly dislocated shoulder and a concussion" at the hospital, an ER trip that TMZ's hyper-vigilant cameras failed to capture on video because of a tip involving some cross words between one of Duff sisters and a Hyde valet that needed immediate investigation.

Ben Silverman Buys Some Breasts For NBC, Calls It A Day

Mark — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 11:57:54 PDT

· Displaying the kind of out-of-the-box vision that recently won him NBC's top programming job at the tender age of 19 (so young, we know!), Ben Silverman has acquired the rights to the Colombian televovela Sin tetas no hay paraiso (Without Breasts There is No Paradise), the story of a woman who seeks a breast enlargement as a solution to her poverty and gets entangled in prostitution. "I scour the world for the best ideas and for the game-changing hit shows and Sin Tetas is one of those shows," crowed Silverman about his get. "Dude, it's like my huge ABC success Ugly Betty, but with hookers and big tits. I've got another winner here, I just know it." [Variety]
· And with leadership like that, why wouldn't NBC Universal be "upbeat" about their network's prospects? [THR]
· The Middle East is hottest war-torn setting in Hollywood right now, with "at least six" films about the region on the way between June and early 2008. [Variety]
· Bruce Willis and daughter Rumer will spend some quality time together building up their family business on the set of The Sophomore, a "teenage take on Chinatown." Unfortunately, Mischa Barton, once famously out-acted by some scene-hogging patio furniture in a pivotal moment on The OC, is also attached to the intriguing project. [THR]
· Speaking of the Willis family business, Rumer step-dad Ashton Kutcher is producing another movie. Details available, but uninteresting. [Variety]