Even The Lure Of Christie Brinkley In The Next Room Won't Prevent This Man From Jerking Off To Internet Porn

Sheryl Lowe: 'I Am Not A Racist Size-Queen'

The jaw-dropping allegations made by a former Rob Lowe nanny against the actor's wife, Sheryl Lowe—which, by our count, contained one n-word, one use of the word "cockring," six separate mentions of male sex parts, and a chilling reference to minors that our non-deviant minds have yet to fully absorb—has elicited an official response from the accused. It comes to us courtesy of The Insider, so you'll have to try to tune out the smacking, salivary sounds that accompany it:

"As a mother of two young boys, it is sickening and disgusting that Mrs. Allred and Ms. Boyce would stoop so low as to drag a child into this latest, baseless, predatory lawsuit. To falsely attack my husband is one thing, to attack me is another, but to do this to our son reveals not only their lack of character, but how far they are willing to go to play the "lawsuit lotto".

The rest of the statement continues after the jump:

Rob Lowe NannyGate Rendered Even More False And/Or Terrible With New Harassment Claims

Amid the blizzard of claims flying back and forth between Rob Lowe and the former nanny claiming "false terribles" comes further accusations made against the Allegedly Pervy House of Lowe: A second nanny, Laura Boyce, has filed a cross-complaint against the couple in which she accuses Sheryl Lowe of doing everything short of demanding an au pair ménage à trois:

Among the allegations against Sheryl:

- Walking around naked, completely exposing herself to Boyce.

Rob Lowe's Nanny Finally Teaches Us The Definition Of 'False Terrible'

As we learned last week, Brat Pack alum Rob Lowe's method of dealing with a pesky sexual harrassment charge made by his nanny includes letting the world know just how angry he is via blog. And coining our favorite new entry into the celebrity lexicon by calling the nanny's claims "false terribles." But as we saw on the Today Show this morning, nanny Jessica Gibson isn't letting catchy phrases stop her from standing by her accusations. And she's got one heck of a pit bull for an attorney to say that for her. Though Gibson could barely get a word in this morning, People reveals the lascivious nature of what exactly qualifies as a false terrible. The gory details and video of her interview, after the jump.

As we put this week to bed, it's time to reflect, project, deflect and genuflect on the week that was...
· Big week for Gorgeous George Clooney. His passion project, Leatherheads,
disappointed at the box office (twice!), he was on the receiving end of a threatening phone call and his sand-loving girlfriend turned his bachelor pad into Yankee Candle outlet. Ah, who are we kidding? He can still pull digits with the best of 'em.
· Ellen Page butched it up on Leno and may (or may not!) have dissed Hanoi Jane.
· Certainly, Tom Cruise has had better weeks. MGM tried to spin Valkyrie's second release date pushback as a B.O. ploy, but we knew better.
· Artie Lange and Charlton Heston both had shitty weeks, too. Artie resigned from the Howard Stern Show and Charlton, well, he died.
· The hackiest hack that ever hacked, Uwe Boll, found himself on the wrong end of an online petition that might just end his career (fingers crossed!). Howevs, he was able to leverage the power of the internet to fight back ... twice!
· It was Musical Chairs week at Hollywood's biggest talent agencies. Bob DeNiro bolted from CAA (spurring a hilarious poison pen post from the Death Star), Nick Stevens led one of "the biggest agent migrations in years" when he bolted from UTA to Endeavor and a finch with a mean streak wreaked havoc at CAA shortly after Ashton Kutcher became the agency's newest client.
· Teri Hatcher and Clint Black learned that they're both better off sticking with their day jobs.
· After publicly (and somewhat shadily) announcing that he and his wife were victims of an alleged extortion attempt by his nanny, Rob Lowe displayed the keen ability to turn an adjective into a noun when he coined the term "false terribles."

Rob Lowe And His Vicious Laundry List Of False Terribles

• WATCH VIDEO

Rob Lowe Accused Of Sexual Harrassment, Takes To The Blogosphere To Fight Nanny's Extortion Attempt

It's one thing when Courtney Love blogs about her legal problems, but Rob Lowe? Maybe it's our Brat Pack fever or simply the fact that he's always flashing the peace sign, but we never figured Lowe as the type to air his dirty laundry online. Especially when the laundry in question involves an alleged "close and intimate relationship" with a former nanny. According to a HuffPo post by Lowe yesterday, a longtime nanny is trying to extort money from him and his wife after claiming Rob pulled a Jude Law:

"A former employee is demanding my wife Sheryl and I pay her $1.5 million by the end of the week or she will accuse us both of a vicious laundry list of false terribles."

Rob Lowe Demonstrates His Commitment To The Environment By Murdering Bird With Golf Ball

Hollywood PrivacyWatch: Katie Holmes, Suri, And A Hovering Handler Enjoy A Morning At The Flower Market