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publicists
Hilton Flack Elliot Mintz Elicits Angry Statement From Nat'l Assoc. for the Advancement of Oompah Loompahs
Ringing in her 27th birthday a little early this weekend—plus the recent addition of a new litter of 13 pomerhuahuas to her ever-growing doggie menagerie—Paris Hilton celebrated by indulging her inner wild-child, throwing on a tiara, pink hair extensions, and a pair of varicose-vein-patterned tights, and table-dancing the night away at a party virtually devoid of pissy rap stars. What inspired off-again/on-again grenade-jumper Elliot Mintz to show up with a face smeared in a brownish-orange substance isn't entirely clear, however. While Mintz initially insisted the look was the result of having tripped and landed face-first into Lisa Rinna's back on his way into the festivities, the meticulous, ear-to-ear coverage suggested something else entirely: More »
awards
Judd Apatow Humbly Accepts His 'Publicity Whore of the Year' Award At The Flackies
At yesterday's ICG Publicists Awards at the Beverly Hilton, Hollywood's most accomplished dissemblers not in the direct employ of the major talent agencies gathered for their annual luncheon celebration, handing out handsome Flackie statuettes (a clipboard-wielding thirtysomething woman hurling herself upon a grenade, cast in the finest bronze) to 2007's most distinguished practitioners of their reality-distorting craft, as well as the grateful celebrity beneficiaries of their skills. Accepting his "Showman of the Year" prize, ubiquitous comedy monopolist Judd Apatow thanked his PR pimps for so effectively turning him out during a busy year in which he had to promote projects like Knocked Up, Superbad and Walk Hard. Reports THR:
"It's an honor to be up here and to be honored as publicity whore of the year," Apatow deadpanned. "And you're all my pimps."More »
At the tail end of a story announcing the nominees for this year's Flackies, the honor handed out by Hollywood publicists to recognize special achievements in the dark arts of spin and punitive client-access withdrawal, clear evidence that the awards season is an utterly exhausting stretch run for reporters forced to cover every last kudos-related press release: "Noms were also announced for the Maxwell Weinberg Publicist Showman Awards for Television and Motion Picture, which honors union publicists for achievements in publicity and promotion during the previous calendar year. I could add those noms here but I thought this was getting long." [Fishbowl LA Photo: ICG]
An Olsen twin is down! An Olsen is down! Thankfully, according to the rep for the Mary-Kate half (the one on Weeds, as you surely recall) of Hollywood's richest set of formerly conjoined twins, the just-announced hospitalization was for a "kidney infection," an explanation far less suspicious than the "exhaustion" and "dehydration" excuses forever tainted by flacks for the actress's more-troubled, serially rehabbing peers. [People]
defamer employment
The Search Begins For Hollywood's Next Top P.R. Assistant
As part of our ongoing mission to connect our readers with exciting opportunities to wear kicky headsets, hold a clipboard, and stand at the entrance of Les Deux, ready to stun-gun the first uninvited star of Sunset Tan who tries to breach the last line of defense at a Sidekick launch party, we are happy to pass along this Craigslist ad seeking an amazing mulititasker willing to sacrifice her life for a chance to learn the dark Hollywood-publicity arts. A warning before you begin reading: don't even THINK about applying if you don't have the energy level a coked-up TGI Friday's hostess and the steely nerves of a fifteen-year bomb squad veteran:
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press release of the day
AshleyMadison.Com Hopes To Use Woods-Boinking Namesake As Perv Bait
In response to a small item we posted two months ago wondering about whether there was any connection between adultery-facilitating dating site AshleyMadison.com and the early-twentysomething Ashley Madison sometimes romantically linked to father-figure/actor James Woods, a helpful publicist has just informed us of the site's new campaign to retain the real-life Madison's endorsement services, hoping that attaching the name of such a well-known celebrity to their product will cause millions of new fornicators to subscribe.
The press release—usually we encourage you to skip them, but this one is a must read—follows after the jump:
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publicists
Pat Kingsley Spins The Torch At PMK/HBH
As we know there's nothing quite as fascinating as discussing the internal reorganization of publicity firms, we note that Pat "The Iron Flack" Kingsley, the celebrity enforcer once so feared it was rumored that she could crush the windpipe of a too-pushy journalist from across a junket venue with a mere pinch of her fingers, is "stepping down" from the chairman and chief executive roles at PMK/HBH after three decades of leadership. But how will the legend and the troika of mouthpieces rising to fill her place in the corporate hierarchy spin the move? With a self-deprecating "I'm getting too old for this management crap" torch-passing, according to the LAT:
"Business projections and financial reports are not what I enjoy doing most," Kingsley said. "I took accounting in college and my instructor suggested that I not continue the course. We are now a conglomerate and it's daunting. I want to be involved in the creative aspects of working with clients. That is what I enjoy." [...]More »
"Wanted to make sure you had information about the news today regarding "Live with Regis and Kelly" —- the top-rated talk show will celebrate its 20th season beginning September 3rd, culminating in an hour-long retrospective on September 14th with special guest Kathie Lee Gifford (please find the press release pasted below). We hope you will include a mention of the special programming in an upcoming column. Please let feel free to contact me for further information, artwork or for anything else you may need."
According to an e-mail obtainted by LA Observed, the LAT has sounded their flack siren upon discovering that a reporter-turned-Sitrick-operative might be trying to sneak back into the building. If he does make his way in, we suggest they shoot for the head, the only reliable way to stop the PR undead in their shambling tracks. [LA Observed]
it's so nice to have her back
Lindsay Lohan Out Of Rehab, Into Possible Naked Photo Scandal
Having already dispensed with two trips to rehab before her 21st birthday, it seemed like only a matter of time before precocious trainwreck Lindsay Lohan would find herself in either a sex tape or naked-photo scandal (apparently, those "chilling," vaguely bicurious knifeplay pics were just a sign of less-clothed images to come), the always-reliable, low-impact way to keep one's name in tabloid headlines for days at a time. Today's Page Six reports that Lohan may be the victim of a shakedown by a blog taunting her via IM (the preferred extortion tool of the MySpace generation) with the possibility it has nudie pics snapped by boyfriend-for-a-minute Callum Best:
Just weeks after sultry shots of Lohan and Vanessa Minnillo goofing around with kitchen knives hit the Web, underground site celebslam.com claims it has its hands on nude photos of Lindsay - and the stalker-ish site is threatening to publish them.More »
publicists
Paula Abdul Thinks Ex-Flack Didn't Jump On Enough Grenades For Her
We incorrectly assumed that as the end credits rolled on the American Idol finale, a designated producer would rush up to judge Paula Abdul, hand her a fist-sized pill for "nerve pain" to gnaw on for a few minutes, and then prop up her slumbering body in a janitorial closet, reviving her from her off-season hibernation only when the first group of Idol hopefuls arrived at January's cattle-call auditions. Abdul, however, has been quite active in the rags since last Wednesday night's sign-off show. She recently railed against how every slurred, on-camera utterance is unfairly scrutinized (can't a popular TV personality chemically manage her chronic pain without people jumping all over her when she momentarily forgets the order that makes strings of words comprehensible?), and today finds herself the subject of a Page Six story describing a "meltdown" she allegedly had on a conference call in which she "seems to be talking to a group of publicists at some point during the last week" about how her former flack wasn't properly servicing her crazy-person needs. An excerpt: More »
reunited, and it feels so good
Elliot Mintz Already Back In The Hilton Family
Unkillable superflack Elliot Mintz, the auburn-haired Rasputin to soon-to-be incarcerated hotel-chain tsesarevnatard Paris Hilton who publicly tendered his resignation on Sunday for his tragic failure to communicate the impossibly complicated nuances of a suspended driver's license to his easily confused charge, is already back at Paris's side. To celebrate the not unexpected reunion, Mintz and Hilton stepped out to the Sober Day USA event (as many of her fellow inmates will soon tell her, it's never too late to get religion) at Paramount last night, where he assured Us that the self-perpetuated rumors of his demise were premature: More »
britney spears
While the males that drift into and out of her life—her father, the manager who forced her into rehab even though she totally doesn't have a problem, y'all!, the agents who scoff at her lack of focus—reliably disappoint her, troubled tabloid ubiquity Britney Spears can at least feel safe in the knowledge that she once again has a woman on retainer that's always got her back: recently rehired superflack Leslie Sloane Selnick, the tireless, for-hire protector of her virtue. Spears' retention of the publicist is already paying dividends, as demonstrated in her response to today's Page Six item in which dad Jamie comes to the defense of his daughter's manager for taking the intervention bullet on behalf of her family:
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Britney Spears Only Flashed Her Vagina As An Expression Of Defiance Towards The Men Keeping Her Down
While the males that drift into and out of her life—her father, the manager who forced her into rehab even though she totally doesn't have a problem, y'all!, the agents who scoff at her lack of focus—reliably disappoint her, troubled tabloid ubiquity Britney Spears can at least feel safe in the knowledge that she once again has a woman on retainer that's always got her back: recently rehired superflack Leslie Sloane Selnick, the tireless, for-hire protector of her virtue. Spears' retention of the publicist is already paying dividends, as demonstrated in her response to today's Page Six item in which dad Jamie comes to the defense of his daughter's manager for taking the intervention bullet on behalf of her family:
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katie holmes
Tom Cruise Ready To Make It Look Like Katie Holmes Is Thinking For Herself
Recently realizing that his weekly, post-Gelson's-run debriefing of the fifteen trusty Level-IV Sustenance-Acquisition Techs who keep his compound stocked with foodstuffs always seems to include troubling reports of new magazine cover stories detailing his stifling control of a frustrated war-bride on the verge of escape, Tom Cruise paused from determining exactly how many links to add to Katie Holmes' ankle chains as a reward for three consecutive days of good behavior, sighed, and decided it might be time to start to start fostering a public illusion about his wife's limited independence. After grudgingly approving a small-time acting job for Holmes, he's now instructed evil agency CAA to direct her to her "own" public relations firm, according to FoxNews.com gossip Roger Friedman: More »
keith richards
Richard's Dad-Snorting Joke Forces Disney To Cancel Tie-In 'Pirates' Snuff Box Happy Meal Toy
While most of the world was excitedly high-fiving one another and asking, "Dude, did you see that Keith Richards totally snorted his dad? That's some messed up shit!" following the appearance of the widely circulated, but quickly denied, story about the hard-to-kill guitarist's novel method for disposing of his father's ashes, there was some moderate-level pants-crapping going on within Disney's PR department, where flacks responsible for the upcoming Pirates of the Caribbean sequel were forced to think about How Keith Richard's Blowing Of Dad-Rails Might Affect The Family-Friendly Summer Blockbuster In Which He Appears: More »
george clooney
Breaking! Hero Clooney Embarks On Million-Dollar Quest To Find The Real Leaker!
It's not quite the CLOONEY PLACES MILLION DOLLAR BOUNTY ON HEAD OF REAL RUSSELL VIDEO LEAK we were hoping for, but still, not bad. More »
i heart huckabees
