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Michael
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methlicious
New Batch Of 'Project Runway' Contestants Desperate To Coin Next Sassy Catchphrase Sensation
The fifth season of Project Runway premiered last night—something you might have easily missed, considering a scorned Bravo did everything in their power to sabotage the Lifetime-headed series short of retitling it People Sitting At Sewing Machines Acting Bitchy and burying it after a 4 a.m. Shamwow! infomercial. In any case, despite all the essentials being in place—i.e. Tim, Heidi, Michael, Nina, and even a surprise cameo by Season One breakout fop Austin Scarlett—there was no mistaking it: the bloom is off this rose. Case in point, the designers blatantly solicitous attempts at establishing themselves as this season's Christian Siriano, whose arsenal of Christianisms—we won't even bothering repeating them here, you know the ones—helped propel him to become the breakout sensation of Season Four. "Girlicious?" "Suede is gonna rock it?" Subpar Tim Gunn impressions? Please. Make it stop. More »
Slim Fast
Megan Fox Vs. Anne Hathaway: Whose 'Scary' Weight Loss Is Scarier?
Isn’t it strange how that rare affliction of being mystically “unable” to gain weight only strikes female celebrities? It seems poor Megan Fox has that very woe to deal with atop her many other personal struggles, like pretending her engagement to one-earring trendmaker Brian Austin Green is still on, and trying ever so desperately to let a director (any director!) just film her nude already. But the newly “scrawny” Fox has reportedly been chastised about her skinny frame by Transformers 2 director Michael Bay, who has demanded that the busty Jolie successor put on 10 pounds or find a new gig. While Megan’s resorted to stuffing herself with cake every night in bed, we might suggest the Anne Hathaway Quick Speed Diet: apparently breaking up with a grade A loser leads to dropping 28 pounds in no time! More »
Short Ends
· Woody Allen's longtime producing partner, Charles Joffe, passed away at age 78. [NYT]
· Continuing the moribund nature of tonight's edition of Short Ends, we're sad to report that nearly 150 staffers at the Los Angeles Times, including publisher David Hiller and truth-challenged reporter Chuck Philips, found themselves on the receiving end of a pink slip. [LA Observed]
· Even though we don't know a single person who watches CSI, we're pretty sure that millions of people will be upset to learn that all-around bad-ass William Peterson is leaving the show mid-season. [Michael Ausiello]
· Your Uncle Grambo's dreamgirl extraordinaire, Miss Amanda Bynes, is dating ... Seth MacFarlane??? NOOOOOO! We are so glad this day is over, we're not sure we could take anymore bad news. [ONTD]
Heath Ledger's Posthumous Oscar Campaign Rolls On
· The eldest denizens of the Dark Knight cast, Michael Caine and Morgan Freeman, made an obligatory promotional stop-off to hobnob with the ladies of The View this morning. And, of course, they used the opportunity to stump for a Heath Ledger Oscar nomination. We'll weigh in tomorrow morning with our own thoughts, as both Seth and STV saw the movie earlier this eve. [The View]· Woody Allen's longtime producing partner, Charles Joffe, passed away at age 78. [NYT]
· Continuing the moribund nature of tonight's edition of Short Ends, we're sad to report that nearly 150 staffers at the Los Angeles Times, including publisher David Hiller and truth-challenged reporter Chuck Philips, found themselves on the receiving end of a pink slip. [LA Observed]
· Even though we don't know a single person who watches CSI, we're pretty sure that millions of people will be upset to learn that all-around bad-ass William Peterson is leaving the show mid-season. [Michael Ausiello]
· Your Uncle Grambo's dreamgirl extraordinaire, Miss Amanda Bynes, is dating ... Seth MacFarlane??? NOOOOOO! We are so glad this day is over, we're not sure we could take anymore bad news. [ONTD]
Old Dog, New Tricks: The heartbreaking vacancy of the old CAA headquarters, which drew nearly 20,000 Michael Ovitz-era mourners to like a sprawling, marble mecca to extinguished power, has been resolved at last. After haggling with a star chamber of landlords including Ovitz himself, Sony BMG Music Entertainment closed a deal Wednesday to relocate its West Coast headquarters to the 65,000-square-foot black hole at the intersection of Wilshire and Santa Monica. Reports put the lease at $4 per square foot and "operating expenses of between $700,000 and $900,000 per year," which include inherited maintenance like office exorcisms, vintage employee execution chambers and a mysterious $370,000 annual allowance for something called "asshole removal." Security guards, maybe? Moving boxes? Your guess is as good as ours. [Variety]
Lists
Fake Love Is In The Air: Top Five Best Prom Scenes, From Bloodbashes To Rose McGowan 'Eating Shit'
If three makes a trend, then a new one is awkwardly dancing its way into Hollywood. First, Lindsay Lohan threw an 80s prom-themed party for her 22nd birthday, then we recently discovered some intriguing prom scene footage from that highly anticipated horny vampire flick Twilight, and now, Var is announcing that Miramax will produce a film based on “This Strange Thing Called Prom,” a piece published last month in the NY Times. Though we never had the (mis)fortune of going to one ourselves, due to prep schools’ distaste for tear-inducing, virginity-threatening functions, the infamous Prom Scene has always been a joyous go-to whenever a teen-themed movie needs a pretty way to transition into Act Three. Below, the five cinematic proms we wish we’d been invited to, from Buffy’s murderous rampage alongside easy rider Luke Perry to the moment Andrew McCarthy tells Molly Ringwald he loves her even though she’s wearing the ugliest dress in the history of ugly dresses. More »
Guess The Celebrity Kids!
They grow up so fast, don't they? But whose are they? That's the question we're posing on today's Defamer Celebrity SpawnWatch brain teaser. The answer is after the jump!
hype city
'Dark Knight' Raves No Match For Michael Bay's Caped Crusader Who Never Was
After more than four months of hype, it's getting to feel like there's increasingly less to discover about The Dark Knight except whether or not it's good. Variety pretty much took care of that on Sunday, overriding David Letterman's early, spoilerrific review with a bit more textural rave. That was preceded in the LA Times by more Heath Ledger superlatives and requisite bleakness reinforcement from director Chris Nolan. But Anne Thompson has an even better showing at her blog, featuring expansive Nolan quotes from a recent screening/discussion and, far more impressively, a look at Michael Bay's little-known original stab at the Dark Knight screenplay:
EXT. A HIGHWAY — DAY ...More »The Batmobile races off into the distance. Finally, BATMAN catches up to the JOKER's zeppelin.
JOKER
Howdy, Batman. Got time for a little... prank?
feuds
Jeremy Piven and Stephen Dorff Invoke Fragile Peace at 'Public Enemies' Wrap Party
We're happy to see today that the winged gatekeeper budget-monkeys on the set of Michael Mann's Public Enemies — who so scandalously sought to exclude scores of part-timers from the film's recent wrap party in Chicago — ultimately came around to relaxing their admission standards to the point where even Stephen Dorff was welcome. That would have been a good enough concession for the justice crusaders over here at Defamer HQ — but for Dorff's infamous urinal-queue archnemesis Jeremy Piven to show up as well? Jesus Christ, will they just let anybody into this place? More »
who's your daddy? no, really, who is it?
First Photos Of Lindsay Lohan's Newest Enemy (And Possible Half-Sister) Emerge
A brief refresher course in what's currently going on in the wild world of the Lohans: Lindsay's dad, Michael, apparently banged some woman when he was separated from Lindsay's mom. The lady he banged had a child. Yesterday, Michael took a paternity test to see if the child is his. We're still waiting on that verdict, but stop the presses ... OK! Magazine has the first photos of Lindsay's potential half-sister Ashley! More »
Mother Of The Century
Dina Lohan, Mother Of The Century: ''Hot' Is Not In My Vocabulary'
Last night’s Living Lohan was all about Ali and her glass-breaking array of vocal talents. The happy family, which is somehow shrinking and growing simultaneously every day now, is still taking Las Vegas by storm as each member’s collective talents go into creating International Superstar-Turned-Trainwreck number two. Little Cody helps out by distracting Dina with adolescent silliness like concussions and that all-too-common need to be “loved,” Ali helps broaden the franchise by doing her best Daddy Left Us And I’m Gonna Record My Angst- And Nicotine-Laced Breakdowns For You! rehashing of Lindsay’s already perfected musical adventures, and Dina grants us with another round of must-have parenting lessons: More »
we are all on drugs
We Reveal 'The Curious World' Of Celebrity Drug Users So You So You Don't Have To Buy The Book
A new book claiming to unveil "fun, fascinating facts" about celebrities and their drug habits may just be a collection of ancient quotes and anecdotes. As the NY Post reports today, The Curious World Of Drugs And Their Friends promises sordid tales involving Lindsay Lohan and details from her substance-fueled evenings before cokepants and trees put them on the back burner, but the story they cite from a "friend" sounds eerily familiar to one of our favorite classic Lohanisms from over a year ago. And the celebrities quoted as being "unable to talk to anyone without a nose full of cocaine," and having "spent the first 35 years of my life in a fog" due to drugs have either kicked their habits long ago or already (endlessly) confirmed to the world that they were once big league nose candy fans. The stars "featured," and exactly how dusty these quips are, after the jump. More »
mentors
Michael Bay Pays Tribute To His Shit-Blowing-Up Forebears
"On Sunday, June 29," the web-blurb legend goes, "Shootout aired a 'Best of' episode on Summer Blockbusters. Guests Jon Favreau, Michael Bay, and Brett Ratner shared their experiences working on major summer spectaculars." And so it was written, and so it should come to pass, that through the magic of repackaging, three of Hollywood's most venerated fauxteurs should share reminiscences and insights with Variety's Peter Bart and Peter Guber. Highlighted above, an exchange with Transformers director and unwitting spondylitis spokesperson, Michael Bay: Acknowledging Bart's observation that he was born into box-office brothels, Bay goes on to pay loving tribute to shlock-piloting cicerones Don Simpson and Jerry Bruckheimer. (Note their imposing, circa-Days of Thunder publicity-shot in high-contrast B&W.) Without them, not a single extraneous helicopter explosion or lingering shot of Megan Fox's ass-crack would ever have been possible.- Shootout [AMC]
Twisted Sister
Lindsay Lohan's 'Secret Half-Sister' Surfaces, Michael Lohan Excitedly Fuels Rumor's Truthiness
Not that claims like these are shocking when you’re part of that wild fame-chasing bunch currently Living Lohan, but Star is reporting that one of Michael Lohan's old flings has taken a paternity test to prove her 13-year old daughter is the newest member of everyone’s favorite dysfunctional family. According to the mag, a Montana woman named Kristi Kaufmann is coming forward to “make sure the truth comes out...‘My daughter has a right to know who her father is — and it’s Michael.’” Now married to a new cowboy hat-wearing realtor, the 44-year old’s claims aren’t exactly being denied by the wig-loving Born Again. Michael’s ambiguous response, and whether or not the details and timing supplied by Kaufmann support the possibility that Lindsay Lohan has yet another little sister who will inevitably want to "be just like her," after the jump. More »
the doctor is in
Heckling George Michael Treats Dr. Phil For Depression
We had third-row seats to see George Michael last night at The Forum, but we sold them off at the last minute when we heard he was mixing his old withering, little-known heckling act into the greatest-hits mix. The revelation instantly piqued our sympathy for the uninformed who couldn't possibly anticipate what was about to hit them — folks like Dr. Phil McGraw, for example, whom a tipster tells us got the very worst of the vocalist's assailments:
He was amazing. And his voice has gotten even better. Best moment was when he pointed out Dr. Phil sitting in the audience and tore him a new A-hole for sitting there lifeless. The crowd booed Phil. George said to him.. it looks like you have a problem.. maybe you should see someone about that.More »
giving back
Meet Nate, Here To Service All Your 'Transformers 2' Background Player Needs
THR readers today likely took notice of a full-page, back cover ad trumpeting a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to possibly maybe rub shoulders with Hollywood's foremost detonative dreamweaver, Michael Bay—plus the entire cast and crew of Transformers 2!—at The Happy Ending Bar and Restaurant in Hollywood. As if that wasn't reason enough to swing by, the entire event is a fundraiser benefiting the Spondylitis Association of America. It all comes to you courtesy of the Bay-loving folks at TransformNate.com. Who are they? What's Spondylitis? Aren't happy endings for Thai massage parlors? All good questions. Let's start with the first: TransformNate.com is...well, let's Nate explain! More »
eliter and eliter
Ex-Stripper, Sadist Among 105 New Invitees to Join AMPAS
Hollywood's power list got a little more diffuse Monday when Diablo Cody, Marion Cotillard, Judd Apatow and Sacha Baron Cohen were among 105 new invitees to join the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. The number is the lowest since 2004, when the Academy instituted its "Riff-Raff Rule" limiting the annual invitee total to 137; that said, we're not sure what kind of internal politics and/or pledge drives would necessitate inviting Michael Haneke and Jet Li to assume even 1/6000th of the Oscar vote. Follow the jump for more of this year's celebrated AMPAS Cub Club! More »
keira knightley
