Defamer
drunk again
dealer friend were needed to act as designated driver and deliver the Pivster to his abode unharmed. But what went down at the gas station where he abandoned his machismo-exuding ride? Tell us, nicotine-addicted witnesses, do tell us!
More »
Posts Tagged “
Jalopnik
”
tanked
Schwarzenegger Tank Rides Will Fix Corrupted L.A. Youth Once and For All
In the greatest act of child bribery by a sitting governor since Bill Clinton withheld his 44th birthday cake from a young, broccoli-boycotting Chelsea, Arnold Schwarzenegger recently recalled his vintage M47 Army tank from its Ohio museum exile as an enticement to California's at-risk youths to just behave already, for Christ's sake.
The governor, who used to offer movie set visits to young Angelenos, apparently determined those kids would rather get high than accept his visits to Sacramento to tour the State Capitol:
[Schwarzenegger] said he plans to offer the rides to inner-city children in the Los Angeles area as a reward for staying in school, avoiding drugs and working hard.More »
short ends
Ghost Ride The DeLorean
· Somebody call Doc Brown, this is 1.21 jigga-WHATs of unabashed awesomeness. Keep your eyes peeled for the homey with the prosthetic leg; he puts Mucca to shame. [College Humor via AOTS]· During the course of our day, we read a lot of truly shitty op-ed pieces. It's part of the job, we don't like to complain. While we normally shield these sorts of works from your eyes, we would like to share one of the more egregiously awful pieces we've read in eons with you now. Its title? "How utterly cool is Natalie Portman?" Barf. [MSNBC]
· "We've seen comebacks happen over and over again in the entertainment industry, whether it's John Travolta, the Spice Girls, or fictitious characters such as Indiana Jones or Rambo. Now it's Mr. T's time." So true. We pity the fools who don't read Mr. T's graphic novel! [Mohawk Media]
· We have to be honest, once we hit the 90-second mark in this video and realized that it's 22 minutes long, we stopped watching. That said, many tips have hit the Defamer inbox today telling us it's funny. So, there you go. Democracy in action. [Funny Or Die]
· And finally, we close the day with a bit of good news. The Elliott Smith wall on Sunset in Silver Lake has, thankfully, been untagged and restored to its pristine beauty. A tip of the cap to our friends at LAist. [LAist]
it's dui christmas!
Welcome To The DUI, Mischa Barton
We knew the end of the year would net a far bigger DUI fish than Boy Meets World's Topanga, and Swervy Claus has come through once again, crashing his sleigh into the side of Defamer HQ-2 with a newly booked Mischa Barton to put under our twinkling Christmas stump. True to their names, the girls at Hollyscoop were first on the scene:
Sources tell Hollyscoop EXCLUSIVELY that actress Mischa Barton was arrested in the wee hours this morning! She was handcuffed and arrested at 2:46AM last night and booked at 3:10AM.More »
hollywood out of ideas
NBC Recalls Better-Rated Heyday By Reviving 'Knight Rider'
Proving once again that his finger is firmly on the pulse of what is hot in other countries, in the decades before his network slid into fourth place, or at the multiplex three months ago, NBC's perfect TV executive storm Ben Silverman has made yet another bold programming move that should shame his overly cautious, Idol-dependent, Cavemen-greenlighting rivals: according to Variety, his Peacock is bringing back Knight Rider, preparing a two-hour backdoor pilot that will reintroduce audiences to an updated series about the love between a man and his sassy, wisecracking supercar.
More »
defamer coming attractions
In just a few short hours, Michael Bay's Giant Fucking Robots will lay waste to Westwood Village for the L.A. Film Festival's orgiastic premiere of Transformers, but right here, right now in your browser window, Black 20's Cheap Fucking Robots are coming. Be afraid. More »
Gobots: The Movie
In just a few short hours, Michael Bay's Giant Fucking Robots will lay waste to Westwood Village for the L.A. Film Festival's orgiastic premiere of Transformers, but right here, right now in your browser window, Black 20's Cheap Fucking Robots are coming. Be afraid. More »
more than meets the eye dept.
BFR-MobileWatch: Transformers-Stickered Car Spotted At Burbank Strip Mall
The Defamer Special Correspondent on Cost-Conscious Summer Blockbuster Promotion just beamed us this cameraphone photo revealing the recent whereabouts of the Transformers BigFuckingRobotsMobile first spotted at the Burbank Staples on Monday morning. Dreamworks' economy-class rolling command center was parked outside of the Ca$h Plus near the corner of Alameda and Main (precise coordinates mapped here), where its conspicuous presence undoubtedly enticed dozens of potential ticket-buyers to squirrel away their freshly cashed paychecks until the movie's Fourth of July opening. More »
breaking
Paris Hilton Gets 45 Days In Jail; Hollywood To Burn
In a shocking decision that has shaken our faith in celebrity slap-on-the-wrist justice and should quickly ignite a series of riots all the way from Hyde to Area (Molotov cocktails fashioned from bottles of top-shelf vodka will soon set ablaze the streets of West Hollywood, so avoid the district effective immediately), TMZ reports that Paris Hilton has been ordered to serve 45 days in jail for violating her probation, and is to begin her sentence (no work release, no sassy electronic ankle bracelets, and, we assume, no conjugal visits allowing her to keep her love life in the tabloids) on June 5th. We'll update if more information becomes available; we'll be spending the rest of our afternoon monitoring our inbox for the first reports of widespread looting on Robertson by angry mobs in Kitson's new line of FREE PARIS t-shirts. More »
annals of outdoor advertising
Transformers Attack Sunset Blvd.
This weekend will be all about Spider-Man 3's inevitable march to the all-time opening weekend box office record (we're still waiting for reports about how audiences at the Thursday midnight screenings volunteered to pay triple if that helped beloved Sony get to $140 million), but that's not going to stop competing studios with their own summer products to overhype from trying to steal some of Spidey's thunder. As we speak, motorists stalled in traffic on Sunset Boulevard are enjoying the spectacle of witnessing one of the Strip's most famous buildings wrapped in the largest pulsating, promotional prophylactic ever attempted by mortals: More »
