Jada Pinkett Can Now Add 'Lesbianism' To Resume Skills Section

L. Ron Hubbard Middle School Not An Indoctrination Center, Says Scientologist Founder Will Smith

As we noted last month, the New Village Academy is a private school in Calabasas set to open its doors Sept. 3, founded by Will Smith and wife/appearances-upholder Jada Pinkett Smith. It has become a source of much controversy for having several Scientologists on its staff, who espouse a number of L. Ron Hubbard-advanced learning concepts in the curriculum: among them, the meaninglessly designated "study technology" programme for effective and complete child mind-absorption. The Smiths—still not public with their Scientology affiliations—claim to only be committed to creating "an ideal educational environment." But Carnegie Mellon University professor David S. Touretzky, who has dissected study technology like a rusty E-meter and found it to be about as useful, warns parents away from this particular learning institution, lest they want to find themselves helping with homework essays entitled, "What I Did on My Billion-Years of Servitude Vacation." From the LAT:

Touretzky said many phrases and concepts on the school's website are specific to Scientology. For example, the school lists a "Director of Qualifications" and another teacher who is an assistant in the "Qual" department. The "Qual," said Touretzky, is where people who have completed a Scientology counseling, or "auditing," session or a course in the Church of Scientology are tested by a qualifications teacher.

The Morning After: Will Smith ScientologyGate Continues

Immediately after our exclusive story that executives at Sony attempted to squash an MSNBC.com story about Will Smith's alleged involvement with Scientology ran last night, Defamer received an email from the MSNBC.com news team stating the following: "We have now heard from Sony - furious that someone at msnbc.com is claiming that they asked us to kill the piece." Shortly thereafter, they updated their original story to include a denial that they had ever been contacted by Sony. As any faithful entertainment news follower is well aware, it is standard practice for media big guns to play the denial card as soon as any poor press hits. However, it is important to note that we here at Defamer are standing by the accuracy of our item; we will not be pressured into pulling it down.

Scientology Just One Of Many Religions With Which Will Smith Is Getting Jiggy, Says 'I Am Legend' Star

Rumors have been swirling lately that the Church of Scientology is in the process of mounting a full-on assault on decades of accumulated honky-thetans by aggressively courting African-American celebrities and celebrity couples on the down-low. An attempt at confirmation by the NY Daily News, however, has resulted in a number of statements from personalities of color denying that they may have slipped into the Church's seductive clutches:

You don't have to be Jewish to be a friend of Steven Spielberg. You don't have to be a Muslim to be a friend of Muhammad Ali. And you don't have to be a Scientologist to be a friend of Tom Cruise," Smith tells us.

Katie Holmes, Dazed And Confused

Scientologists Recruit Will Smith In Effort To Break Into Enturbulated Urban Markets

Earlier this month we discussed whether or not Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes' double date with Forest Whitaker and his wife Keisha was less about baby talk and more about Xenu talk. And while we didn't rush to the race card, MSNBC is reporting that TomKat and the CoS are intent on luring more African-American stars onto the Knights of Hubbard bowling team:

"Will is definitely in the process of becoming a member, 'He's been getting more and more involved. And it isn't just him, it's definitely Jada, too. It's that as he becomes more involved, you'd think he'd sort of help fly the flag with Tom (Cruise), who seems to only get a bad rap for it, while Will does this and comes through just fine.'"

An Appropriately Dark Awards Season Awaits

· The Writers' Guild of Great Britain says they're in solidarity with the WGA, and is planning to stage an awards ceremony on Sunday to remind the world that scribes are to be cherished and celebrated, not placed in front of studio gates for SUV target practice. [Variety]
· This year's Oscar contenders display a "bleak, even nihilistic worldview," a largely coincidental development as all were put into production long before Hollywood's collective spirits were darkened by the ongoing labor Armageddon. Should the strike drag on into February, look for replacement host Ryan Seacrest to provide an appropriately somber tone to the proceedings. [THR]
· The Pinkett-Smith family is getting together to make the drama The Human Contract, a film Jada is directing and writing and Will is executive producing. No role is specified for precocious son Jaden, though he may eventually be awarded an associate producer credit for secretly punching up the script during trips to the set with mom and dad. [ Variety]