Defamer
hung with care
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hung with care
red carpet confessions
Roman Polanski's Victim Apparently a Fan of 'Roman Polanski' Documentary
The curious path of the documentary Roman Polanski: Wanted and Desired took another bizarre turn this week when HBO hosted an actual red-carpet "premiere" for the film in New York — the same city where it had attempted to secretly screen the doc for a week-long Oscar-qualifying run last month. Then, as Vulture noted today, things got even weirder when Polanski's 1977 statutory rape victim, the then-13 Samantha Geimer, showed up as one of the guests: More »
jerry and michael
It's Not TV. It's Bruckheimer/Bay Blow-Shit-Up O-Vision.
A stunning development could herald the return of one of the greatest way-above-the-title pairings in Hollywood history: that of superproducing entity Jerry Bruckheimer and überdirecting force Michael Bay, the former the explosion-loving ying to the latter's blowing-shit-up-obsessed yang. The pair's creative partnership resulted, of course, in some of the most beloved, absolutely-terrible blockbusters of the mid 1990s—but what project could satisfy their shared need for one mushroom-cloud-detonation per page and a stream of ham-fisted catchphrases that can only be fully appreciated when delivered by Nicolas Cage?
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the doc is in
Distributor Rescues Roman Polanski Doc From Theatrical Siberia, Preps For Oscar
ThinkFilm today announced its acquisition of theatrical and DVD rights to the documentary Roman Polanski: Wanted and Desired, which made as many headlines recently for its acclaimed Sundance run as for being dumped in New York and Pasadena for a week by its Oscar-craving original buyers at HBO. The cable network retains the broadcast rights, planning a June 9 premiere ahead of ThinkFilm's July 11 theatrical release. We know what you're thinking — a TV premiere before theatrical? But it's not that unusual, and it can only help in the awards push sure to come. More »
between the one-sheets
The Top Three Reasons Why The Official 'SATC' Movie Poster Sucks
For what seems like an entire century, ladies and ladyboys have been anxiously awaiting the release of the ultimate "chick flick," Sex And The City: The Movie (have we mentioned how godawful that title is by the way?). In any case, yesterday we had the privilege of seeing the final one-sheet for the film which is set to open next month. And almost immediately, we began griping about it (annoyingly, just the way Carrie Bradshaw whined over her column's bus ad during the first season). After the jump, we discuss all the various problems with this image, from that dress to that font to, well, almost everything, boiled down into three primary points: More »
trade roundup
Spike TV Unveils Their All Cong-Gutting 'Rambo' Schedule
· "What's our name?!" "Spike TV!" "And who do we serve?" "Men!" "And what do men like?" "Rambo!" "So what do we do?" "Air all the Rambos! Aarrghghhhh!!!!" [Variety]
· Rob Schneider, Kristin Cavallari, and Rumer Willis will star in Wild Cherry: "When she finds out the boyfriend's only interested in her for the sake of the team's 'bang book,' she and her best friends plan their revenge inspired by the Greek play 'Lysistrata,'" a source we're certain its cast is intimately familiar with. [Variety]
buried alive
Outlandish Oscar Rules Force Film Arguing For Polanski's Exoneration To Wait for Cable TV
We'll call this Confounding Oscar Reality #259: A tipster tells us today that the documentary Roman Polanski: Wanted and Desired, which painstakingly makes the case that Polanski's conviction for unlawful sexual intercourse with a minor was a travesty, has opened theatrically after leaving Sundance in January with a $1 million dollar deal and loads of acclaim. But wait — why are we hearing this from a tipster? Where is the marketing? Where are the reviews? Where is the heated discussion about the Polanski case? Thanks to Academy Award rules and a fickle distributor, that might have to wait. Follow the jump to find out why. More »
short ends
· HBO orders a pilot from the Mr. Show guys. [THR]
· Is the Guitar Hero party over? [Idolator]
· Squint a little and you'll get a picture of what Jakeypoo Gyllenhaal will look like in his 50s. [ONTD]
· You'd think someone 81-years-old with the wherewithal to build himself a "suicide robot" from the ground up would have something to live for. Also: Wouldn't it be more accurate to just call it a "murder robot?" [Times Online]
· Behold the one Jared Leto poster that will not be adorning your 30 Seconds To Mars-groupie daughter's wall. [moviesblog.mtv.com]
Margaret Cho Reveals Plans To Become 70-Year-Old Tattoo Lady
· On The Ellen DeGeneres Show today, Margaret Cho explains how she avoids the knife in favor of the needle. [Ellen]· HBO orders a pilot from the Mr. Show guys. [THR]
· Is the Guitar Hero party over? [Idolator]
· Squint a little and you'll get a picture of what Jakeypoo Gyllenhaal will look like in his 50s. [ONTD]
· You'd think someone 81-years-old with the wherewithal to build himself a "suicide robot" from the ground up would have something to live for. Also: Wouldn't it be more accurate to just call it a "murder robot?" [Times Online]
· Behold the one Jared Leto poster that will not be adorning your 30 Seconds To Mars-groupie daughter's wall. [moviesblog.mtv.com]
merry pranksters
Many Psilocybin Surprises In Store For The Boys Of 'Entourage'
What would happen if the douchey Entourage cast all took a bunch of 'shrooms and headed out to the desert to "find themselves?" According to EW.com, we'll soon learn. As creator Doug Ellin puts it, "The boys trek to Mexico and Joshua Tree National Park...they'll eat some psychedelic mushrooms...It's one of my favorite episodes. It's their Into the Wild trip." But as any fan of psychedelics knows, the concept of putting four man-children out in the middle of nowhere with nothing but widened minds to entertain themselves can only lead to (further) homoeroticsm and cannibalism. Our hallucinogenic fever-vision after the jump:
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trade roundup
Carolyn Strauss Calved At HBO
· HBO shakes things up in their original series development department, moving longtime president Carolyn Strauss into a new, not-quite-fired-but-let's- see-what-some-new-blood- can-do-about- never-letting- John From Cincinnati -happen-again position. [Variety]
· Hollywood StrikeWatch 2: The Bickering. SAG and AFTRA can't seem to decide whether basic cable should be included in the upcoming actors negotiation, leading to a flurry of strongly worded letters and "near-constant sniping" between the two unions, who'll ultimately air out their differences in a choreographed rumble in the Farmers Market parking lot, set to the music of Leonard Bernstein. [Variety]
· Marvel Studios has sold the exclusive broadcast rights to FX for a package of five of their movies, including the upcoming Iron Man and The Incredible Hulk, along with three more, yet-to-be-determined titles. (We're pulling for a She-Hulk Vs. She-Thing, starring Rachel Bilson and Mischa Barton.) [Variety]
trade roundup
Penis-Curious Adam Sandler Reunited With Former Roomie Judd Apatow
· Adam Sandler, Seth Rogen and Leslie Mann will star in "Untitled Apatow Manchild Project" for Universal and Sony, providing ample opportunity for former Apatow-roomie Sandler to glimpse his director's flaccid manhood. [Variety]
· Mila Kunis will play opposite Mark Wahlberg in Max Payne, the movie version of the pulp noir videogame. Sadly, lack of cheat-codes will prevent audiences from seeing her blow some guy's brains out completely naked. [Link NSFW!] [Variety]
buddhism for dummies
Paris Hilton Hires Buddhist 'Guru' As New Shopping Buddy
If any of you had the fortune of seeing Susan Sarandon and Ralph Fiennes in HBO's latest TV movie Bernard and Doris, you may remember the tobacco heiress's inexplicable desire to adopt a hare krishna healer. And now, following in the aristocratic footsteps of her idolized lady-who-lunch predecessors, Paris Hilton has decided to add a Buddhist monk "guru" to her ever-changing collection of confusing, flamboyant accessories. The gray-bearded, orange-robed monk has now replaced her standard arm candy of dogs, D-list actors and purses emblazoned with her own visage on them. But is Paris genuinely interested in learning the ways of the Dalai Lama, or is she eerily mirroring Duke's descent into madness? More »
owning tony
Lawsuit Forces David Chase To Be Way More Forthcoming With Sopranos' Beginning Than He Was With Their Ending
The Sopranos creator David Chase, who once dismissed the series's fans as an unruly mob of closure-obsessed Tony-turncoats, has made the pilgrimage back to his old stomping grounds to testify in a federal lawsuit brought against him from a former judge who claims he was never fairly compensated for helping to create the now-legendary series:
David Chase, the creator of "The Sopranos," returns this week to New Jersey to testify in a federal case brought against him by a former judge who claims he helped create the HBO series and has never been compensated for his work.More »
trade roundup
Hurt By Pitt, Universal Throwing Itself Into Crowe's Big, Strong Arms
· A rebounding Universal tries to shake off its recent jilting by Brad Pitt by climbing into bed with Russell Crowe, inviting the actor to partake of Pitt's State of Play sloppy seconds. [Variety]
· Even though it feels like there's been nothing good to watch on HBO since the end of The Sopranos (Flight of the Conchords notwithstanding), the network's subscriber numbers have actually risen slightly since the Best TV Show in The History Of The World went off the air. We suppose we have no chose but to credit (at least in part) all the fucking on Tell Me You Love Me for retaining viewer interest. [THR]
trade roundup
Jennifer Connelly Takes the Keanu Reeves Co-Star Challenge
· Hollywood Out of Ideas, Can't Blame the Writers For the Current Idea Shortage Edition: Jennifer Connelly—an actress we'd pay $14 dollars to watch knitting a sweater or making peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwiches—will join monosyllabic, paparazzi-punishing superstar Keanu Reeves in Fox's remake of the 1951 sci-fi classic The Day the Earth Stood Still. [Variety]
· Big Love polygamist Jeanne Tripplehorn is on board for HBO's movie version of Grey Gardens, playing Jackie O opposite Jessica Lange and Drew Barrymore's Big and Little Edies, respectively. THR]
· ABC's Cashmere Mafia might be the first primetime victim of the strike, as the network yanks the new series from its schedule before its originally planned November 27 debut. But good news for those craving Sex and the City-inspired entertainment: NBC hasn't yet abandoned nearly identical project Lipstick Jungle. [Variety]
Though it pains us to admit it, we fear our once-torrid relationship with HBO fuckumentary Tell Me You Love Me has gotten a little stale; where we once eagerly tuned in to freeze-frame each possible stunt-cock scene for evidence of the Truth or to uncover acts of penetration that were supposed to be obscured by a cinematographer's carefully cast shadows, there's no longer any joy in our Zapruderesque examination of the sex-riddles we're offered each week. Things have gotten so bad, in fact, that following last Sunday's episode, we couldn't even be bothered to wonder whether Ian Somerhalder's actual scrotum made a cameo, or if a contractual no-balls rider necessitated the use of a nuts-double. Maybe we'll bring it up with our surprisingly foxy, sexagenarian therapist in this week's session. Anyway, there's footage of the scene at the link following this item, for those whose workplaces allow the viewing of graphic depictions of attractive people screwing. [Fleshbot]
closure
David Chase Tells Pathetic 'Sopranos' Fans To Feel Guilty About Wanting Tony Whacked
With HBO subscribers understandably less engrossed in the mysteries with which the network now presents them on Sunday nights—such as whether or not Tell Me You Love Me's Adam Scott employs an ejaculating stunt-cock or how much longer we have to wait before producers serve up that hotly anticipated sexagenarian-penetration scene—it's inevitable that viewers don't seem quite ready to end their speculation about what actually happened in The Sopranos final, endlessly discussed moment. Series creator David Chase, who once emerged from post-finale hiding to reassure us that he wasn't fucking with America's collective head with his creative choices, now returns (in the form of an interview in a new Sopranos book) to offer people a greater degree of closure. Reports the AP:
"There WAS a war going on that week, and attempted terror attacks in London," says Chase. "But these people were talking about onion rings." [...]More »
behavorial psychology dept.
Study: Larry David Might Be Mentally Ill
If you've ever felt that the awkward confrontations in which Larry David invariably finds himself during the average episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm sometimes seem like the product of profound mental illness rather than improvisational comedic invention, the work of a clinical psychology student noted in this week's New Yorker might finally convince you that David's TV character might have deeper problems than merely being an impatient, fussy jerk. When the student showed episodes of Curb to his schizophrenic patients, they quickly recognized Larry's socially dysfunctional behavior:
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