The Finale Of 'The Hills': 'Imagine Everything You've Seen And Then Completely Unimagine It'

Live, From New York, It's Saturday Night: Defamer Pays A Visit To Studio 8H

Photos of Brad Pitt boarding a helicopter in Monaco with sons Maddox and Pax yesterday instantly set the intertubes abuzz, as the aircraft's rotors blew up the actor's shirt, revealing a mysterious new tattoo covering his lower back. The seemingly random series of horizontal dashes and shapes were initially thought to be a highly encoded abstract design, each line representing one member of the ever-growing Pitt-Jolie clan. But now, Defamer can exclusively report (Must! Credit! Defamer! Pitt! Tattoo! Exclusive!) that the tattoo is not yet finished, with the final result paying homage to one of the great design triumphs of the 20th Century. An artist's rendering of what it will look like is after the jump:

Leaked 'Sex And The City: The Movie' Clip Suggests [Spoiler Alert] Carrie Finds True Happiness

• WATCH VIDEO

Lindsay Lohan And The Case Of The Fur Burglar

• WATCH VIDEO

Lindsay Lohan's Intolerable Shit Costs Her 'Manson' Role

Semi-rehabilitated celebrity minknapper Lindsay Lohan was all set to star in charmingly titled anti-romantic comedy The Manson Girls, the second installment of her Great Homicidal Psychopaths of Modern History Trilogy that began with Chapter 27 and was to conclude with her harrowing performance as the Austrian incest dungeon victim in The Basement, a Starz Original Film. But as Deadline Hollywood Daily now reports, Lohan has been let go from the production:

Lindsay in the true life crime film was to play the dramatic part of Nancy Pitman, a pampered surfer girl who became enthralled with Charlie Manson. But insiders explain that Lohan quickly became more of a deficit than an asset when they discovered that they couldn't find any name actresses who wanted to co-star with her.

Are Scientology Moms Katie Holmes And Leah Remini Feeding Their Kids Toxic 'Hubbard's Formula'?

'NY Times' Riles An Already Grumpy, Taco-Deprived Population

Metromix L.A. posted an angry—and justifiably so, we'd say—response to a NY Times piece from earlier in the week about the movement to save L.A.'s beloved taco trucks, currently endangered thanks to new city ordinances that would limit where they can do business. (The article begins, "Los Angeles, loath to rally cohesively around a local cause, has joined hands around tortillas," and continues to paint a portrait of an apathetic community who only manage to rally when the fate of their al pastor-access is in danger.) Decries Metromix:

In drawing upon predictable stereotypes, Steinhauer presumes that food is not in itself political. While we stupid Angelenos fail to notice real issues like architectural blights on our skyline or the mismanagement of municipal funds, the food-obsessed have rallied around something as inconsequential as taco "carts."

The Wachowskis Still in Hiding as 'Speed Racer' Circles the Drain

For all its confectionery imagery, Christina Ricci scene-stealing and the few other things Speed Racer gets right, it still faces a box-office false start that could make Leatherheads look like a hit in comparison. We sketched a few of the hurdles here yesterday (number one being its own studio's resignation to its underachievement), but at this point there's only one that counts: Larry and Andy Wachowski need to climb out of their hole.

It might be self-serving of us to suggest they publicize their films, and in a way, we empathize with their reclusion; Larry Wachowski has been the subject of sex-change and dominatrix-dating speculation since a feminized version of himself — earrings, plucked eyebrows, manicure — showed up on the Matrix Revolutions red carpet in Cannes five years ago with mistress Ilsa Strix (née Karen Winslow) on his arm. The siblings later sneaked into the New York premiere of V For Vendetta (which they wrote and co-produced), and last week in Los Angeles they went positively presidential with subterfuge at the debut of Speed Racer. "They did not do the red-carpet press line at the Nokia Theatre on Saturday, and were well-camouflaged during the after-party," wrote Borys Kit in The Hollywood Reporter. "Photographers were sworn to secrecy as to their whereabouts, and Warner Bros. assigned handlers the mission of keeping journalists off the scent."

It's 'Page Six' Vs. Nick Broomfield in Battle of Current-Events Sensationalists

Madonna Slips Female Fan Some Tongue On Stage, Lourdes Asks 'Is Mommy Gay?'

The Hills: 'I Want To Get My Hands In There And Make Myself Available To You'

The Schlub Factor (And Four Other Reasons 'Iron Man' Struck Box Office Gold)

We assumed in last week's Defamer Attractions column that $75 million opening-weekend estimates seemed awfully conservative for Iron Man, but even our $90 million forecast undershot the film's $100.7 million three-day take. (It was $104.2 million if you count Thursday night previews, and more than $200 million globally.) Aside from the obligatory splash for any early-summer tentpole, we're surprised observers didn't see the finely calibrated alchemy that Marvel and Paramount used to spin its Iron into box office gold:

1. The Schlub Factor. Like Sam Raimi, who guided Marvel's previous blockbuster franchise Spider-Man to its own record openings in 2001, 2004 and 2007, director Jon Favreau is kind of a schlub — a normal dude who came up through the ranks and pretty much is his audience. He's not Ang Lee, whose misunderstood Hulk is disavowed to the point that its own studio is remaking it this summer (with another non-schlub, French action auteur Louis Leterrier), or even Bryan Singer, whose X-Men franchise coasted on star power before burning itself out at the hands of patronizer extraordinaire Brett Ratner. Favreau imposes a fan's vision and an indie mandate (i.e. character development, budget-mindedness) that works primarily because it threatens no one — neither the studio that paid for it nor the viewers spreading word-of-mouth months in advance and lining up around the block on opening weekend.

Which Star Just Told Us She Has A Fake Butt?

• WATCH VIDEO