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Nic Fits
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Nic Fits
Fighting Fire With Fur
Meat Lover Jessica Simpson Becomes Latest Celebrity To Face Snarky Wrath Of PETA
No blog, talking head or alcoholic British songbird can compete with PETA when it comes to snark. For decades, the animal lovers have verbally beheaded countless starlets for their fur and snakeskin accessories, but only recently have their targets bitten back. After seeing a recent photo of plumper-than-usual Jessica Simpson sporting one of those so-last-season message t-shirts reading “Real Girls Eat Meat,” we wondered how many of her peers have boldly set themselves up for one of PETA’s trademark white powder massacres. Having called Nicole Richie “an incredible shrinking woman with the heart to match,” advising Ashley Olsen that “wearing fur does add 20 pounds, but if [she] wants to fill out her frame, we suggest using a fork instead,” and telling Lindsay Lohan “there's no road to recovery for the foxes who are anally electrocuted so that you can look skanky,” has PETA inspired any other starlets to publicly react just as vehemently? We take a look at the ongoing battles after the jump. More »
slim fast
The Secret To Looking As 'Fit' As Gwyneth And Beyonce? Starve Yourself Silly, Of Course!
Coming in at number two right after Lesbian Chic on the list of 2008's hottest celebrity trends is the slim fast phenomenon sweeping the pounds off Catherine Zeta-Jones’ ass, Britney Spears’ arms, and pretty much every inch of co-starvation partners Katie Holmes and Victoria Beckham. But of course, when Queen of Female Mind Control Oprah Winfrey puts in her two cents on the dieting front, every housewife and Oprah wannabe begins taking dutiful notes on how exactly she’ll take a few pounds off this time around. And according to a piece in the NY Daily News, Detox is the word. From Gwyneth and Beyonce to Ralph Fiennes and Vince Vaughn, these four varieties of temporary "cleansing" yourself are the current diet du jour. And of course, the question is: does it work? And more importantly, is giving up our nightly vino and succumbing to regular colonics worth looking like a lollipop head? Which celebrities are using which method, and visual evidence of their results, if any, after the jump. More »
back to work
Three Simple Rules For Getting Lindsay Lohan To Work On Time
Yesterday marked Lindsay Lohan's first day on the set of Labor Pains, her first paying film role since the abominable "stripper with dueling personas" fiasco that was I Know Who Killed Me. And while we can’t imagine that the prospect of actually working (not to mention faking on-screen love with male co-stars) was leaving Lohan with anything other than a frowny face, somebody on the set had a really good idea as to how to motivate her. As these pictures show, it took only three things to cheer the seemingly sober-these-days star up to levels not previously seen since the Mean Girls days — too bad each of the vices things in question (including the delivery woman) aren’t exactly good for her health.
Bikini Bodies
Britney Spears Lets Her Weave Down On Mel Gibson-Funded Vacation, But Who's The Mystery Man?
Jennifer Aniston did it first, quickly followed by Blake Lively. Now Britney Spears has pulled out this spring’s most reliable accessory to nab a boy toy: the bikini. While sobering up at Casa Gibson down in Costa Rica, Spears spent the weekend looking happier than she has in months in two very itty bitty string bikinis adorned with tattoo parlor jargon. And in between bouts of boogie-boarding, golf cart-riding and rounds of Hide-and-Seek played amidst driftwood, Spears appeared to have successfully lined up a male suitor of her own. Who the mystery man might be, and a closer look at Spears' ongoing tendency to block her possibly-knocked up belly from sight, after the jump. More »
Areola Squad
Emmanuelle Chirqui's Topless Photo Shoot Lures LAPD's 'Areola' Squad
Though celebrities dropping trou for the glossies has proven both controversial in Miley Cyrus’ case, and “artsy” in Lindsay Lohan’s, both of these spreads were intelligently shot behind closed doors. But when GQ decided to photograph Entourage’s Emmanuelle Chirqui fully exposing her curves in the bright light of day, controversy didn't come by way of conservative media pundits. It arrived in the form of the LAPD’s official nudity-watch squad, who interrupted the shoot to get a closer look make sure all was okay on set. As Chirqui recalls, one pervy fed stepped in as art director and instructed the crew "Could you make sure that her areolas aren't showing?" See what all the fuss was about for yourself after the jump:
hanky panky
Blake Lively Learns From Jennifer Aniston's Poolside Seduction Techniques
It’s always cute when newbie stars brush off rumors about their love lives by calling them “silly” and saying “we’re just good friends!” Fresh faces like Gossip Girl’s blonde bombshell Blake Lively have yet to learn that making public denials like these mean only one thing: the rumors are true. Back in January, Lively said just that regarding tabloid stories linking her to on-screen make-out partner Penn Badgley (he’s the hot-but-nerdy one, a la Seth Cohen on The OC). And shockingly (!), pictures released today prove not only that Blake and Penn have been fooling around poolside - in an uncanny rendition of Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer’s beachy-keen gallery last week - but that they may actually make it after all. More »
slim fast
Colin Farrell Becomes Latest Member Of 'How To Gain Acting Cred By Losing Weight' Club
In the latest attempt by a Hollywood superstar to Oscar grub by radically transforming their physical appearance, former hard-body Colin Farrell is rapidly downsizing for his upcoming part as a war photographer in Triage. And while Farrell could use some credibility in the acting department following his recent string of flops, hacking off all these pounds doesn’t look like the healthiest way to do it. But admittedly, dieting your way towards industry approval has been a Hollywood go-to trick for quite a while. We took a look back at some of his peers’ most drastic weight losses, and as scary as the morphing process made them look, each part did bolster their respective careers dramatically: More »
guessing games
The Easter Bunny No Longer Prime Suspect In Minnie Driver Baby Daddy Mystery, But Who Is?
Thus far, Riches star Minnie Driver has given the public three wildly different answers to anyone inquiring who knocked up the card-carrying member of that annoyingly massive Celebrity-Slash-Singer subset. Among the potential baby daddies she's flung out into the media’s clutches? The Easter Bunny, musician Craig Zolezzi, and yes, God him or herself. And six months into her pregnancy, Driver has defiantly and coyly kept her lips sealed, until now. In a recent interview with the UK’s Independent, she finally released two very telling details: the guy is British, and "sort of in the same business." Our guesses lie after the jump, but we leave it to you, loyal Defamer readers, to solve the mystery: More »
autoerotica
Eva Mendes Realizes Your Wildest Shrimping Fantasies [NSFW]
We'd hate to ruin this moment with too much talking, so we'll keep this brief: Yes, that's Eva Mendes. Yes, she is savoring her own big toe. It's from a spread in Vogue Italia. Any questions? Many? Then you probably aren't a subscriber to Horny Hooves or Arch Arousal, and this probably isn't your bag. After the jump: Two more NSFW shots, including one of a topless Mendez beneath a glass serving tray that instantly calls to mind the Ira Isaacs obscenity trial soon to rock a 2 Girls 1 Cup-loving nation:
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when celebrities attack
Top Five Classic Celebrity Paparazzi Attacks (As Inspired By Sienna Miller's LAX Handbag Assault)
Casual nudity enthusiast Sienna Miller became an official card-carrying member of that elite group of celebrities who unleash their hate of paparazzi by way of physical assault. As the Daily Mail reports, Miller swung her pricey purse at one pap's face yesterday at LAX, possibly because he was a resident of Pittsburgh, or maybe she simply mistook him for Jude Law (as the pictures show, there is a resemblance to the nanny-loving baldie). But Sienna's moment of outrage prompted us to recall our all-time favorite When Celebrities Attack moments in time, from Woody Harrelson's caught-on-tape choke-hold to Justin Timberlake and Cameron Diaz's romantically executed freakout years ago. Our five top picks after the jump: More »
rocks of love
Scarlett Johansson Shows Off New Engagement Ring, But How Does It Compare To Celebrity Rocks Of Yore?
Sorry boys, It appears as if Scarlett Johansson really is taken. As we noted yesterday, 2006's Sexiest Woman Alive got engaged to equally easy-on-the-eyes boyfriend Ryan Reynolds, and judging from ScarJo's behavior last night at the Costume Institute Gala, the soon-to-be-bride appears incapable of hiding her joy. All smiles as she walked the carpet, Johansson even did the paparazzi a favor by flashing her new rock, and her choice to wear an off-white demure dress helped us paint some mental images of her upcoming walk down the aisle. But how does her ring compare to infamous engagement rings of the past (J. Lo's sad pink diamond monster mid-Bennifer trainwreck) and rings recently sported by newly engaged stars like Mariah Carey and Ashlee Simpson? We compare and contrast after the jump. More »
reunions
Tom And Katie Kiss And Make Up With Beckhams
Though the Metropolitan Museum's annual Costume Gala is considered by most to be the Oscars of the fashion world, the truth of the matter is that no one really focuses on the clothes. What really matters is which celebrities show up to WEAR the clothes and, of course, whether or not they're lookin' good. That said, all eyes were entirely focused on the recently friction-laden, reportedly squabbling super-duo of Team Cruise and Team Beckham, who reunited once again for the cameras. And despite the gushing show of admiration and respect that the Beckhams demonstrated for the the Hubbard-lovers on yesterday's Oprah, both Holmes and Beckham were allegedly competing for the spotlight last night. And in the end? The girl with the higher-slit dress tends to win every time. More photos from the event, including our picks for the best and most horrific looks of the night, after the jump.
defamer photo essay
Why Does Keira Knightley Always Look So Sad?
Most stars have their own trademark pose on the red carpet. Think Renee Zellweger with her pursed lips looking like she just took a shot of lemon juice, or Lindsay Lohan's classic blowing kiss move. As for Keira Knightley, with her wildly perfect facial features and oddly appealing underbite, she's patented "The Pout." As she puts it:"I was pouty when I was 16 or 17 and it's sort of stuck...It's when I'm nervous and my neck gets really really tense and then that pressure sort of squeezes up to my lips and they push out and there you go, that's the pout."Though, if nerves are to blame for Keira's moody look on red carpets, why pout her way through movie roles as well? We examine the Knightley Pout from both past and present, on and off-screen, after the jump. More »
wannabes
Remember The Days When The Last Person Paris Hilton Wanted To Be Was Nicole Richie?
It's tough to remember (or believe) that once upon a time, Nicole Richie was merely Paris Hilton's chubby, recently-rehabbed, dread-locked sidekick. She made a name for herself by starting fights in clubs and providing a crude antidote to the far more glamorous Paris during the first season of The Simple Life. Fast-forward five years later (just like in Lost!); Richie has managed to outshine Hilton's star status not by doing anything in the way of "work," but instead by transforming into a style icon with a fiance and baby to boot. And lately, Paris seems to be doing everything in her power to copy her former lesser half's life, from her choices in fashion and boyfriends to her recent and sudden slim-down. More »
foxes, bears, and wolves
Another 'Lost' Mystery: How Does The Island Affect Body Hair?
As everyone knows by now, watching Lost is akin to having Damon Lindelof mount a stepladder week in and week out, and proceed to engage in vigorous intercourse with the squishy contents of your skull. Last night's episode was no exception, offering us [spoiler alert] a flash-forward to Matthew Fox's Jack, who, in a shower-reveal scene reminiscent of a gender-reversed "Bobby's return" from Dallas, is shown to be living with Kate back home. This Jack, however, sported not the rabbi-envy-inducing beard teased in Season Three's finale. Now bear with us, if you will, as we tumble even further down the manscaping rabbit hole:
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beautiful and damned
