omg
Nothing suggests a good week to come like the Catholic Church calling out "godless" Hollywood — or, more specifically, rebuking Tom Hanks and the rest of the fork-tongued heathens who had requested access to shoot parts of Angels and Demons in a few of Rome's celebrated cathedrals. The Vatican apparently has yet to get over the whole Jesus-was-married thing from The Da Vinci Code, and the part in Angels and Demons when Hanks's Robert Langdon arrives at Santa Maria della Vittoria "to find a cardinal being set on fire" doesn't seem to help matters:
The scene will now be shot on a soundstage after the diocese of Rome closed its doors against the producers. Father Marco Fibbi, a spokesman, said: "Usually we read the script but in this case it wasn't necessary. Just the name [of source novelist] Dan Brown was enough."
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celebrity pain
As
EW spoiler kingpin Steven Daly
might have hinted they would, shutterbugs recently got a glimpse of
Tom Hanks reprising his role as coiffure-challenged
Da Vinci Code symbologist Robert Langdon on the Rome set of
Angels & Demons. Everything was going appropriately by-the-numbers when the chronic anguish of complacency rocketed into the Oscar-winner's pinky, requiring a brief stoppage of production as medics attended to the finger. "What ees eet, Tohm?" they were heard to ask.
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demons
Denise Richards fling-survivor and
two-time rehab graduate Richie Sambora experienced one of those
nasty wake-up calls last night, stopped by Laguna cops shortly before 11:00 PM after swerving in a Black Hummer. "He failed numerous field sobriety tests and was detained for DUI. At the station Sambora opted to take a blood test rather than blow into a breathalyzer. Laguna Beach PD Sgt. Jason Kravetz [says], 'At this point there's no indication of drugs.'" Funny—we don't remember asking about drugs. We leave you now to spend some quiet time with Sambora's bemulleted mugshot, looking deep into those bloodshot eyes as you sing out to no one in particular, "Sometimes you tell the day/By the bottle that you drink/And times when you're all alone all you do is think."
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puking up demons
If there's any question as to why we've been eagerly anticipating Celebrity Rehab, the latest offering from VH1's Reality Department/ Non-Skank-Romance Division, since first being teased by footage of Jeff Conaway blowing a rail of fauxcaine, one need only take a look at this ABC News headline, which practically bullet-points every stage of Dr. Drew Pinsky's clinically-proven-to-induce-ratings 4-step program. (Mop-wielding orderlies are typically on high alert prior to Step 3.) Distancing himself from University of the Web-accredited quacks like Dr. Phil and other exploitative reality fare covering the same ground, Actual Medical Doctor Pinsky explains how his show is far more than just Celebrity Apprentice with piles of blow and a stocked bar (which, now that we mention it, would make Trump's show a lot more interesting):
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The guy who unsuccessfully sued Dan Brown for ripping off the basic premise of his own non-fiction book for
The Da Vinci Code has died, suggesting a deadly curse is afoot, striking anyone who dares get in the unstoppable bestseller's way. (We fear the delaying of the movie version of
its sequel Angels & Demons puts many at Sony in danger. Watch out for falling pianos, Amy Pascal!) [
AP]
trade roundup
· Ron Howard and Akiva Goldsman are frantically finalizing the shooting script of Da Vinci Code sequel Angels & Demons before the Oct. 31st deadline, hoping that the mad rush towards production won't jeopardize the duo's ability to produce the kind of easily digestible, crowd-pleasing entertainment that always results from their lucrative collaborations. Meanwhile, star Tom Hanks has been presented with a hair-growing schedule that will barely provide the actor with enough time to reproduce his character's signature demi-mullet. Truly, no one is immune from the pressures of the looming™ strike. [Variety]
· In what is always a good sign for a floundering series, The Bionic Woman gets another new showrunner, not even two months after "creative differences" ended NBC's short-lived love affair with Glen Morgan. [THR]
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demons
Because we once swore on a stack of six-month-old glossies in the lobby of a shady direct-to-video production company in Simi Valley to exhaustively chronicle every celebrity detox attempt that crossed our desks—with no celebrity too
paunchy, sunburned, or sloppy-seconded to escape our scrutiny—we pass along news of the latest in what will surely go down as a
bounty year for rehabs:
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Defamer
