Revisionist 'Robin Hood' Adds Sienna Miller to His Stash For the Poor

According to a press release in the Defamer inbox, Hollywood superproducing entity and non-recovering idea-addict Brian Grazer will be the recipient of the Mary Pickford Foundation Award at the USC School of Cinematic Arts 2008 graduation tomorrow—an honorarium presented by Disney head Bob Iger, and awarded to "men and women of USC who have made an indelible impact on the entertainment industry." This is obviously exciting news indeed, and we encourage any proud parents in attendance to send along video of the mogul-rich milestone. But were that all, for what lifted this publicist-penned correspondence beyond the realm of the commencement-speech-announcement mundane was a file attachment, accompanied by eight little words that shot a volt of pure ecstasy through our spine: "Have also attached a photo for your use." Oh. My. God. Are they kidding us? Just this once: Grazerhead has come home.

The entire press release is after the jump.

In Search Of The Next Grazerhead

A helpful operative happened to notice a Banksyian homage to everyone's favorite cultural-attaché-seeking (or maybe seeking no longer? We'd love a hiring update!) superproducer-entity, Brian Grazer. They write in to explain:

I was mountain biking the other weekend and spotted this stenciled Brian Grazer image spray painted on a traffic light control box at the intersection of Sunset Blvd and Allenford.

Knowledge Junkie Brian Grazer Seeking New Thought-Pusher

Brian Grazer has made little secret of his helplessness over his knowledge addiction: The superproducer's cravings have become so extreme, he can regularly be found shivering in the alley outside the Imagine offices awaiting his cultural attaché, who arrives bearing a bindle of high-grade Blue Insight for Grazer to cook up over a bare lightbulb and inject directly between his concept-hungry toes. But with his trusty idea-pusher having decided it was time to move on, the unusual job listing for his replacement has been making the Hollywood rounds. The New Yorker reports:

The e-mail explained:

This person would be responsible for keeping Brian abreast of everything that's going on in the world; politically, culturally, musically. . . . They're also responsible for finding an interesting person for Brian to meet with every week . . . an astronaut, a journalist, a philosopher, a buddhist monk. . . .

[SFX: a PHONE RINGING at Defamer HQ]

Mark: Yeah?
Grazerhead: Hey, buddy.
Mark:: Hi?
Grazerhead: It's Grazerhead!
Mark: Oh! Hi!
Grazerhead: So...big day, huh?
Mark: Yeah, I suppose it is. [a deep, soul-weary sigh.] I suppose it is.

The Smart 50: Entertainment Weekly Declares That There Are At Least 50 Intelligent People In Hollywood

We've made no secret of our love for Hollywood power lists, as hierarchical inventories of which players are currently swinging the biggest dicks (and that doesn't exclude the ladies who occasionally creep into the rankings!) in the entertainment industry briefly bring order to an otherwise confusing show-business world. In a twist that threatens to redefine everything we thought we knew about putting numbers next to famous names, the iconoclasts at EW have decided to substitute "smart" for the vanilla, outdated notion of "power," a decision that has catapulted burgeoning comedy monopolist Judd Apatow from an already-impressive #13 on Premiere's old-timey 2007 index to the top spot in Hollywood's New Smart Order.

Brian Grazer: Something Special In The Air

A Defamer operative browsing the fine in-flight literature in his seat-pocket library just sent in this blurry cameraphone image of the current edition of American Airlines' ON magazine, where he was understandably startled to find superproducer Brian Grazer's face smiling back at him. (Click the pic for a bigger version; if you still have trouble reading the text, it says: MOVIE MAKER: What do a mermaid, an astronaut, and a Harlem drug lord have in common? Brian Grazer.")

Brian Grazer Would Trade His Hollywood Kingdom For A 'People' Cover

Despite having earned untold millions from his incredibly successful superproducing career, won an Oscar for his shepherding of a buddy comedy (with heart!) about a math-loving schizophrenic and his favorite imaginary friend, and having recently dragged a troubled, $100 million passion project out of development hell and into a lucrative box office run all by himself, Imagine's Brian Grazer is still tormented by feelings of Hollywood inadequacy. In today's NY Times, Grazer, his signature hair-spikes seemingly wilting with each anguished word, laments that for all of his show business accomplishments, his name is still relatively unknown by the middle-American moviegoers to whom he delivers Russell Crowe-starring cinematic delights every couple of years:

Despite having won Oscars as well as most other film and television awards, Mr. Grazer remains largely unknown outside Hollywood. And while he acknowledges the success of his work, he still craves public recognition.

Brian Grazer's Tireless Superproducing Work Pays Off In 'Gangster' Triumph

On this gloomy Monday morning, take a moment to review the weekend's studio strike fund box office results, allowing yourself to momentarily ignore the coordinated chants of the picketers outside your place of employment.

1. American Gangster - $46.344 million
The already-incredible story of how superproducer Brian Grazer singlehandedly brought long-troubled passion project American Gangster to the big screen (background here—make sure you have some tissues handy before following the link, for the part about how he nursed a sickly script draft back to health by feeding it formula through a medicine dropper is guaranteed to elicit tears) has become even more uplifting now that it's debuted as the number one movie in the country.

In Denial About The Coming Labor Apocalypse, Hollywood Keeps Announcing New Projects Like Nothing's Wrong

· In a badly timed announcement of blockbuster-derived profits, Viacom crows about the "phenomenal success" of "new global brand Transformers" that helped lift their net income by 80 percent, forgetting to transfer the revenues to a balance-sheet loss column and publicly lament that "there's no money to be made in this dying business of ours." [Variety]
· Knowing that TV is, like film, a financial dead end (see bullet point above), Oprah is launching her own channel on the YouTubes. If that venture proves as successful as the media mogul hopes, the purchase of the entire internet could quickly follow. [THR]

The Heartwarming True Hollywood Story Of The Brothers Grazer

Portfolio's Hollywood Deal blog writes touchingly of the once-strained relationship between Imagine Entertainment superproducer Brian Grazer and black sheep sibling Gavin, whose reciprocal appearances at each other's recent New York movie premieres (Brian's the troubled $100 million blockbuster he brought to the screen by sheer force of will; Gavin's, a somewhat less expensive , surrealistic Anthony Hopkins art project) were indicative of a closeness that long eluded brothers on the opposite end of the spectrum of Hollywood success. You need to read the entire story to appreciate their long journey towards reconciliation, but we've excerpted a couple of the piece's feel-good moments here:

Grazer's stature as the younger, struggling sibling of big-shot, Oscar-winning, and occasionally hyper-intense producer Brian Grazer is well-known in Hollywood but will have its first real public airing in Slipstream. Writer-actor-director-producer Hopkins (dubbed "SIr Realist" by one paper) chose to call Gavin's character "Gavin Grazer"; Brian Grazer considered a cameo as the character's unnamed brothers but couldn't schedule it.

Hollywood Dreams Of Labor Peace, Internet Porn, And Starter Wives

Superproducer Brian Grazer Superwoos Clint Eastwood Over Dinner

PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers, and are posted several times a week, so send them in often. Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line so we don't lose them) and tell everyone about the time you spotted Scott Baio: 45, single, and ready to settle down with a new iMac.

In today's episode: Clint Eastwood, Brian Grazer, and Dick Wolf; John C. Reilly; Common; Topher Grace; Dennis Haskins; The State; Sam Rockwell; Justin Long and Drew Barrymore; Donald Logue; an Olsen; Giovanni Ribisi; Henry Winkler; Jason Lee; Edgar Wright; Holly Robinson-Peete; Mindy Kaling; Scott Baio; Meg White, Vincent Gallo and Eric Erlandson; Thomas Calabro; and Jesse Metcalfe.

Brian Grazer Puts 'American Gangster' On His Back, Carries It Into Theaters Himself

When roughly $22 million worth of Russell Crowe and Denzel Washington fans show up at the multiplex on long-gestating, twice-aborted Universal feature American Gangster's opening weekend, not even the succession of credits reading "Produced by Brian Grazer," "Based On An Idea By Brian Grazer To Do A Movie About A Magazine Article About A Drug Kingpin From The 70s" and "A Ridley Scott Film Shepherded By Imagine Entertainment's Brian Grazer, Who Simply Refused To Let This Crazy Dream Die" will give moviegoers an adequate appreciation of the Herculean efforts undertaken by the spikey-haired superproducer to finally bring his passion project to the screen. The LAT chronicles the mogul's heroism in the face of seemingly insurmountable obstacles (budget overruns! eight-figure kill fees! cost-controlling script rewrites that ripped the very soul out of the story!), here recounting the dark moment when a momentarily defeated Grazer had to tell original director Antoine Fuqua that Gangster had been shelved:

The loss cut deep.

We at Defamer realize that a layout issue in our recent redesign has somewhat reduced our ability to shock you with the unexpected deployment of Brian Grazer's official headshot (the Grazerhead™ to regular visitors), and so in the interest of putting you back on edge, we're bringing out the nukes: this screenshot of a shirtless Grazer, who was cornered by a TMZ video camera this weekend at the Polaroid Malibu Beach House after presumably trying to superproduce an anonymous blonde's phone number by casually mentioning that she'd be perfect for the Splash sequel he's been wanting to do for twenty years.

We apologize in advance for any emotional trauma this may have caused you.

• Grazer on Prowl? [TMZ]

· The moviegoing public's hunger for threequels has proven so lucrative that studio executives have taken to using three hundred-dollar bills at a time to wipe themselves in celebration of their incredible run of summer success. [Variety]
· Will Hollywood's mad rush to get projects into the production pipeline before a possible strike result in movies which are shittier than normal? Answer: Yup, almost certainly. [THR]
· Warner Bros. is planning a live-action, big-screen version of the Hanna-Barbera cartoon Johnny Quest. Not that anyone asked us, but there's no way this gets made without Timberlake attached to star, right? [Variety]
· Just 2 million dedicated moviemaking fans tune in to Fox's absurdly low-rated—but still alive and kicking!—On The Lot on Tuesday night, as the show quickly approaches its goal of having a single viewer for each dollar in the competition's $1 million top prize. [THR]
· Imagine visionary Brian Grazer will superproduce the tentatively titled series The FBI for Fox, a project that should finally satisfy Grazer's burning desire to do "a thing about the CIA or the ATF or NSA or whichever one of those places with the cool initials will let me sleep on the floor of their offices for a few months so I can soak up the atmosphere. And maybe shoot a gun." [Variety]