DuckyDoom commented on Breaking: Clay Aiken Pregnant!

"I like it that her name is Jaymes."

DuckyDoom commented on What Harper’s Bazaar Wants You to Know About George Clooney’s Girlfriend

"Cock Tailing."

DuckyDoom commented on Scarlett Johansson CloneGate Blows Lid Off Actress's 'Illegal' Genetic Twin

"That'd certainly explain her acting skills (or lack thereof)."

DuckyDoom commented on Just Rolling Out The Chosen Two's Rouge Carpet Will Cost Brangelina $20 Million Dollars

"@TurdBlossom: Oooh, is this when the "Holy Trinity" allusions begin?"

DuckyDoom commented on Kat Von D Now Fucking Nikki Sixx

"I just have to point out that Vincent D'Onofrio now looks exactly like my dad."

DuckyDoom commented on Cameron Diaz Goes Bald And Not-So-Beautiful For Next Movie Role

"@Al_Pastor: my fiancee is trying to figure a way to write into our marriage contract that I'm not allowed to shave my head ever (barring medical reasons), because it's hideously unattractive."

DuckyDoom commented on She Just Keeps On Getting Bigger and Bigger

"Where the hell are her arms?"

DuckyDoom commented on Orlando-based pop svengali

"I can just imagine the joy of all of the prison gangs that the guy responsible for quite a few of the boy bands is going to be joining them."

DuckyDoom commented on Angry Message Board Rant Accuses Billy Bob Thornton Of Cyberstalking And Cocaine Abuse

"She gets a B- for imagination, but an F for grammar."

DuckyDoom commented on The Finale Of 'The Hills': 'Imagine Everything You've Seen And Then Completely Unimagine It'

"@IKnowThings: Yeah, that had me laughing."

DuckyDoom commented on Tracing Shia LaBeouf Back To His Humble Origins As An Echo Park Hot Dog Carnie

""Like, yeah, I'm white, but I have soul." That's my new line."

DuckyDoom commented on The Finale Of 'The Hills': 'Imagine Everything You've Seen And Then Completely Unimagine It'

"Spencer's shushing had to be the highlight of that episode, but the funniest part I think I've ever seen is in the "recap show" where they showed a shot of Audrina and JB arguing by a dumpster after she caught him kissing another girl, and that Jenner kid kept saying "it's funny that they're by a dumpster because he smells bad!!" Thank God for the flu, huh?"

DuckyDoom commented on Jennifer Aniston Uses Patented Demi Moore Boy Toy Magnet: The Bikini

"@Bentos, Der Frischmacher!: every rockstar type I've dated has been a prick."

DuckyDoom commented on Brad Pitt's Cryptic New Tattoo Explained!

"I just about creamed myself at the thought of a Donkey Kong tattoo."

DuckyDoom commented on Frankie Muniz Will Straight Up Murder Your Ass

"I just want to go give him a hug and wipe that dirt off of his upper lip and chin."

DuckyDoom commented on Barack Obama Reels From Scarlett Johansson Paternity Claim

"Maybe it's just me, but she's just irritating at this point."

DuckyDoom commented on Eva Mendes Realizes Your Wildest Shrimping Fantasies [NSFW]

"So this is what can occur when one is addicted to prescription drugs and alcohol."

DuckyDoom commented on My Male Pattern Baldness Prevents Me From Lifting Heavy Items

"@thecatsmeow: the first thing I thought "Why the hell is Phil Collins mentioned on Defamer?" Genius minds, apparently."