"Dodgers Stadium"? Are you Yakov Smirnoff?

Not even close, man. Bruno's actually funny on a consistent basis and doesn't reach into a bag of made-up e-mails to punch up his show.

Rome is a marginally-talented frat boy who never grew up, and can't carry Bruno's jock (with apologies to Larry Holmes). How that turd Rome ever became a success remains a mystery -- and he is the sole reason that Jim Everett is my favorite football player of all time.

Rack me.

But someone's gotta shield the general public from William Shatner's itinerant nips. Dirty job, as they say ...

I really like and respect Canadians as a people and Canada as a nation (Hey, I even was engaged to a woman from Toronto. It's true! But I wised up and married a girl from L.A.).

You, on the other hand, are not so cool and clearly DO have a problem with "Canada jokes." I want to see your point, but your obnoxiousness (which you obviously caught from some dink south of the border) makes that impossible.

Now that you've dropped the gloves, which will get you an extra two minutes on an "instigator" penalty, let's be honest: Canada, despite it's size advantage over the lower 48, has the United States to thank for not being a Russian possession. Love your national health system, hate your inferiority complex, which is clearly on display in your posts.

And, having lived in both the Carolinas, I have the experience to confirm there are many differences between them: you know, just like how the Tim Hortons doughnut shops and PetroCanada stations up in Saskatoon are totally different than those in Winnipeg.

There are plenty of Americans who are super smart -- who do you think bought all those Anne Murray records in the 70's? Had enough? -- because I am quite through "crushing your head." Crush, crush.

No, I'm not fucking kidding. Not by a long fucking stretch.

It's fucking fuck-hats like you who empower fuckwads like David Spade into thinking it's totally fucking OK to, like, go into a fucking restaurant and go, like, all "blah-fuckity-fuck," despite the fact that some of the other fuckers in the fucking joint might not think that fucking shit is so fucking funny or fucking acceptable, for that fucking matter.
And before you get all fucking offended at my response, I'd like to direct your fucking attention to the un-fucking-deniable fact that "fuck" is just a motherfucking word.

Fuckin' A, right.

Koi Schmoi, doesn't really matter: once children are about, one should, as a simple matter of decency (if not humanity), ditch the potty-mouth routine. Even if we remove kids from the equation, I would be greatly annoyed if someone near my table in ANY restaurant were cursing loudly, without regard for others. Decent people don't do that sort of thing.

Yeah, because drug addicts almost always tell the truth about whether they're still using, so I can totally see why you defend him on that point.

Seriously: benefit of the doubt is one thing, but only where experience tells us it should apply. My guess is that its application this case may be misguided.

Hey, thanks folks ... don't forget to tip your wait staff .....

Your "ears went out," honey pie? Wish I could say the same.

Lazy? A little bit, but if you like Dave, you don't mind so much: I've been watching the show from the 1980s jump, and I have come to expect him to go back to the well time and again -- in fact, it is one of the things I now find endearing about his act. Maybe it's no more than comedy comfort food, but I likes it anyhoo. Dish it up, I say.

If you're not a fan, his tendency to repeat stories (kinda like Granpa does!) is very likely to annoy you.

Wake me when Nick Lowe appears on an episode of "Flight of the Conchords."

Now that you mention it, yes, but only because that dress is cut so high.

Ka-Pow!

To be fair, I do not find Scientology (at least what little I know of it) to be more offensive than any of the Semitic traditions. For my secular humanist money, it's all a load of nonsense.

Do not fear Tom. Let him instead entertain you.