Short Ends: Cocaine: The Test Drive

· A Best Week Ever blogger decides to test-drive Cocaine (the energy drink, not the strawberry-flavored narcotic), and discovers that a drug habit is probably more advisable than another dalliance with the peppery, heart-palpitating beverage.
If Lindsay Lohan really wants to get back at her recent ex and Paris Hilton at the same time, might we suggest she mastermind an easily traceable murder-suicide frame-up? Let's just get everyone out of the way at once.
Meanwhile, American Airlines uses Lohan's own words against her.
· The Thighmaster doesn't seem to be much of a Studio 60 fan. Maybe he's getting back at Aaron Sorkin for that cheap shot about bloggers being spelling-challenged, pajama-clad hacks.
Great news for Silver Lake homeowners—your sudden proximity to the tony shops of Larchmont Boulevard should instantly boost your property values!
· It's been far too long since we've done this, so: Hey, unicorns!

6:57 PM on Tue Sep 26 2006
By Mark
248 views
6 comments

Comments

Tiger_Tanaka at 06:55 PM on 09/26/06
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Sexual revenge/humiliation? We need to get Lindsay and Desserae Bradford in a room together. ASAP.
ILikeSalads at 07:20 PM on 09/26/06
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Hey you rich Pepperdine religious Malibu asshats, Larchmont is proudly an area of HOLLYWOOD, and where I live. Hollywood rocks (over Silverlake), even the yuppie Larchmont area. Speaking of which, glad this silly article didn't mention the BEST restaurants in the area (Mexican...those in the know, know what I'm talking about!)
Procrastinator, Esq. at 12:41 AM on 09/27/06
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Actually, Larchmont is part of Hancock Park, not Hollywood (and certainly not Silver Lake).

(Melrose is the boundary between Hancock Park and Hollywood. Everything to the south, including Larchmont, is Hancock Park territory.)

Thus concludes today's L.A. geography lesson. Who knew Defamer could be your own personal snarky Thomas Guide?
BoHan at 08:23 AM on 09/27/06
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Connectedness Index: 149

damn toothy_tile spouting accurate geography again. gawd I hate him so much I just want to pet him.
Cutting Makes You Sexy at 08:35 AM on 09/27/06
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"Our reactions evolved from 'Oh God, it burns' to '(hysterical coughing)' to 'I can't… I can't feel my chest… it's on fire!'"

I think I will stick to my regimented Thurs. through Sun. weekly Cocaine Classic™ binge, thank you very much. All this phooey about crack enhanced energy drinks and snortable strawberries just corrupts the dignified modesty of my pure and simple rail-blowing addiction.
livingblinditem at 10:51 AM on 09/27/06
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All I could think when I saw the headline: "Yes, but is it strawberry flavored?"