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Jenna Jameson

Mother Of The Century

Ali Lohan 'Makes It Delicious' In Televised Tryout For Vaunted Porn Producer

It’s always a hoot when you show up to an audition thinking you’re just trying out for another straight-to-DVD horror remake, only to find out afterwards that you just emoted all your talents in front of a titan of the porn industry. In yet another display of complete parental ignorance, Dina Lohan’s decision to send Lindsay-wannabe Ali on a journey to score a part in Troll in this weekend’s season finale of Living Lohan was kind of equivalent to sending your 14-year old daughter on a read-through of Bun Busters 13 or Breast Wishes 15. Yes, Ali’s eager efforts to make it big in showbiz has officially included a smiley “nerve-wracking” experience reciting classic lines like “Ratburgers!” in front of the multi-colored hair piece-topped Peter Davy, responsible for discovering gangbang queen Houston, among many other hardcore accomplishments. The clip, including Ali's stomach-tightening attempt to impress the porn industry professionals, after the jump. More »


porn again

Jenna Jameson Steps Over Naked Bodies Littering The Porn-Star Crossover Trail

Jenna Jameson's mainstream star turn in this week's Zombie Strippers seemed bemusing enough to us a while back — right around the time, probably, that dirty-minded Premiere critic Glenn Kenny undertook his massive new survey of porn-star crossover attempts. We knew a little about the wide trajectories of most performers cited here, including Marilyn Chambers, Traci Lords and obviously Jameson herself. We didn't know, however, the degree to which more worldly veterans like Ron Jeremy were slumming when they first broke into smut: More »

The impossible dream imagined last year as word of the scintillating, straight-to-DVD Zombie Strippers — an actual movie starring Jenna Jameson and Nightmare on Elm Street veteran Robert Englund — circulated around the Web inched closer to reality last week, with Sony Pictures so certain of the magic at hand that it announced theatrical releases in more than a dozen cities April 18. A note slipped over the Defamer transom this morning (with the accompanying poster) alluded to "worldwide media sensation" Jameson's role in a strip club that gets hit with a secret government virus: "As one of the strippers gets the virus, she turns into a supernatural, flesh-eating zombie stripper, making her the hit of the club. Do the rest of the girls fight the temptation to be like the star stripper, even if there is no turning back?" We can hardly wait to find out, though we're guessing that like all canonical zombie films with ripe moral metaphors on hand, only a forceful 20-spot to the G-string can save the afflicted dancers from an eternity of brain-chomping damnation. [Sony Pictures]


loose lips sink chicks

British Tabloid Press Mounts Full-Scale Attack Against 'Trout Pout' Infestation

After turning their swarthy disdain for Jaffa Cake Knees into a full-out journalistic attack, the Brit tabloids are at it again, only now they've sunk their unmanicured claws into an affliction rampant in Hollywood they've dubbed "trout pouts." Known victims of said affliction, like Jenna Jameson and Heidi Fleiss, have long been injecting so much poison into their lips that kissing them might feel a bit like sucking on an well-inflated balloon. Angelina Jolie Pillow Lips, these are not. After singling out once-quite-pretty actress Saffron Burrows as the poster girl for T.P., they've unleashed their venomous pens on several other poufy-lipped ladies—and no group of newsies writes a meaner caption than the snarky Brits. NSFYH (that's Not Safe For Your Health) pics, along with their brush-offs, after the jump. More »

expected denials

How To Make Shit Up Like Jenna Jameson

Apparently, merely yearning for the sight of Scarlett Johansson lovingly devouring pounds of sweaty ladyflesh does not make it so. Johansson's reps are swiftly, stiffly nipping in the bud all rumors that she will step into porn star Jenna Jameson's edible panties:

While Jameson has gushed for months that the A-list beauty-cum-Woody Allen muse would be the perfect choice to headline her lurid tale of sex, drugs and award-winning girl-on-girl action [...] Johansson denies any and all involvement in the sure-to-be skin-heavy flick.
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next week, the rumor will be about jessica biel

How To Make Love Like Scarlett Johansson

Fans of Scarlett Johansson — or of her cleavage — must be donkey-punching themselves with glee over rumors that the Oscar-nominated actress may bring that necessary dose of gravitas, youth, and authentic breasts to an upcoming Jenna Jameson biopic. According to the Daily Express, the self-proclaimed "World's Greatest Newspaper" and bastion of the rigidly fact-based journalism we've come to cherish from the British tabs, naturally curvy Johansson has assumed the missionary position and will cleave to the role of the surgically enhanced porn star in a Universal project:.

[The film] is based on Jenna's bestselling autobiography How To Make Love Like A Porn Star, which followed the 33-year-old from ballet dancer to stripper to film "actress" and multi-millionairess businesswoman.
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