Since You Asked, Yes, We Will Be Liveblogging The Oscars

Because the only way we know how to watch the Academy Awards is drunk to the point of blindness on cheap champagne while pounding a laptop keyboard with clenched fists and cursing a cruel and uncaring Creator for delivering undeserved victory into the hands of the artistically bankrupt, we will be liveblogging the Oscars telecast for a third straight year, generously sharing our semicoherent, real-time expressions of despair with those who, like us, are unlucky enough not to have anything better to do on Hollywood's Biggest Night. While we've previously promised the morbid spectacle of the first-ever liveblogging suicide, we fear that if last year's Crash win couldn't drive us to slit our own throats with the shards of a Brokeback Mountain screener, the far lesser cinematic evils of this year (really, who can get that whooped up about Little Miss Sunshine or Babel?) probably won't be enough to push us over that particular edge. Still, one never knows how one might react to news that Children of Men has lost to The Black Dahlia in the cinematography category while in André's volatile, bubbly clutches, so please do drop by on Sunday evening just in case.

Previously: We Are All In This Thing Together: Liveblogging The Oscars [Defamer]
Defamer's Biggest Night: LiveBlogging The Oscars [Defamer]

3:12 PM on Fri Feb 23 2007
By Mark
4,029 views
14 comments

Comments

Greasy Thumb Guzik at 05:14 PM on 02/23/07
Reply by Email
*

Nikki Finke is also liveblogging the Oscars.
Damn you Defamer, how do I choose?
BoHan at 05:25 PM on 02/23/07
Reply by Email
*
Connectedness Index: 149

@Greasy Thumb Guzik: If last year's Finke liveblogging is any indication, she'll just piss and moan for four hours, and then say I told you so about a thousand times. Rock on Big D.
Panqueque at 05:29 PM on 02/23/07
Reply by Email
*

Andre is the cruelest of all sparkling beverages. I don't know if it's the depression that drives you to drink the whole bottle or the whole bottle that drives the depression, but they're certainly linked. If you're going to watch the Oscars and drink that though, at least get the pink kind-- I don't want you guys to hurt yourselves.

Also, what is this? The second weekend in a row you've had to work now?
Mark at 05:52 PM on 02/23/07
Reply by Email
*

@Panqueque: We give and we give.
Adele H at 06:42 PM on 02/23/07
Reply by Email
*

Do yourself a favor and spring for Nicholas Feuillatte's Brut Rose.
Usually on sale, (as in a few dollars off) at Gelsons.
Less headache, more deliciousness.
You deserve it.
Happy blogging!
megan7876 at 06:29 AM on 02/24/07
Reply by Email
*

i am so thrilled about this! i am going to be stuck in a hotel room in michigan sunday night - without dvr. xenu bless you, mark!
Cookie Guggleman at 09:43 AM on 02/24/07
Reply by Email
*

I'm feeling a Gosling upset tomorrow night.
yikesahootie at 05:26 PM on 02/24/07
Reply by Email
*

Yay! Yay! Yay! Yay! Yay!

Also: yay!
NotReadyForPrimeTime at 06:21 PM on 02/24/07
Reply by Email
*
Connectedness Index: 45

I don't drink and I don't own a Lesbian Tuxedo. Am I still welcome?
The Gen X Eurotrash... at 12:15 PM on 02/25/07
Reply by Email
*

Well, I'll be at a friend's so away from my computer lifeline, but I will be sure to snark some comments at the completion of boredom time before going to bed with visions of Jennifer Hudson dying an extended, gory death dancing in my head.
gwendemarco at 03:45 PM on 02/25/07
Reply by Email
*

I'm so fascinated by Guiliana DePandi's trainwreck of a face. Watching her avoid her right side is shall be enough for me.
Scout at 04:25 PM on 02/25/07
Reply by Email
*
Connectedness Index: 91

Only 1 hour to go. Can I start complaining yet?
Scout at 04:59 PM on 02/25/07
Reply by Email
*
Connectedness Index: 91

I insist on a crotch check for Eddie Murphy's date.
nojo at 05:12 PM on 02/25/07
Reply by Email
*
Connectedness Index: 62

Is it just me, or do the preshow Q&A's sound as canned as a sports event?