Defamer
As you grab your head, trying to fight back the waves of nausea still lingering after Saturday's debauchery long enough to remember where you buried that leprechaun's body—hey, he looked like a leprechaun after that tenth whiskey—take a few moments to review the weekend box office numbers. They'll fix you right up. They always do.
1. 300—$31 million
Despite a precipitous drop-off from last weekend's stunning $70 million opening (it's OK—obsessive Hellenic history fans are notorious for rushing to theaters to see operatically homoerotic, CGI-enhanced reenactments of their favorite historical battles), Warner Bros. is already rushing a sequel into production. The tentatively titled 301 will be ninety minutes of nothing but beautifully rendered, comic book panel-inspired images of Sparta's fiercest warrior and a leftover Persian interloper repeatedly stabbing each other in their perfectly sculpted abs. Predicted opening weekend: $85 million, summer of 2009.
2. Wild Hogs—$18.825 million
We'd be depressed that Wild Hogs has so quickly crossed the $100 million milestone, but having to occasionally think about this movie over the past three weeks has already made us too dead inside to really care.
3. Premonition—$18 million
It seems crazy to say this, but Premonition is actually Sandra Bullock's strongest opening ever—eclipsing even career-defining blockbusters like Hope Floats and Practical Magic.
4. Dead Silence—$7.771 million
We'll have to do a little research and figure out what that Sandra Bullock movie is about first, but we're pretty sure our bold prediction of last week has come to pass: Dead SIlence is the number one ventriloquism-related horror movie of the weekend of March 17th! Amazing!
5. I Think I Love My Wife—$5.715 million
Strange...Chris Rock remaking an Eric Rohmer film seemed like such a commercial slam dunk when it was announced. Executives at Fox Searchlight are surely meaningfully rubbing their chins this morning, baffled by trying to figure out what might have gone wrong between surefire conception and ultimately disappointing execution.
- March 16-18, 2007 Studio Estimates [Box Office Mojo]
Comments
Sadly, Daily Variety reports today that New Line is scaling back on Cedric The Entertainers's remake of Louis Malle's 'Lacombe Lucien'.
Followed by Martin Lawrence in Au Revoir Les Big Mama's Enfants.
However, thanks to his sterling work in Shrek and Shrek II, Eddie Murphy is still a go to voice the CGI version of Bresson's Au Hasard Balthazar.
Bernie Mac spies something in a photo he took -- leading to hilarity! -- in "Blowin' It Up."
Oh, and of course, we can't leave out My Dinner With Andre 3000
I will not rest until I see Chris Tucker remake the Godard classic, "Pierrot le fou".
My Life As Snoop Dog?
And let's not forget The Rules of The Game, starring The Game.
I love you Nick_R. That was well played.
@Arken: Is that the one where Wallace Shawn reprises his role as the Grand Nagus?
I'm holding out for Mo'nique in a remake of À Bout de Souffle
@nojo: No, you're thinking of Le Negus de la Pleine Lune
Who knew there was such a void in the female- movie-going segment of the market? Leave it to Sandra B. to fill said void with such tepidity.
Imagane the box office if the 300 was historically accurate and showed the Spartans fighting completely naked except for helmets, greaves, and (ahem) long spears!
Eddie Murphy in 400 Blows. Double entendre infinite possibilities.
The Wu Tang Clan does Twenty Seven Samurai.
I'm too transfixed by the 12 pack of the warrior to be amusing.
The reason Sandra's film didn't open bigger is that all the chicks are watching 300...for the third time.
Um. No reason I know that.
Start a discussion:
Login with your username and password below. Or comment on this post via email.
Forgot your username or password? New User?