Defamer
The LAT examines the circumstances surrounding Arnold Schwarzenegger's recent skiing accident in Idaho and subsequent leg surgery (see accompanying cyborg specs). It's a trip no one seemed to know about, like most of his frequent journeys out of state—1 of every 5.6 days in office, they report—terminating in an accident about which the Governor's people are being extremely reticent. It seems our operative in Idaho was on to something, however, as their investigation indicates Schwarzenegger was careening down the hill at reckless speeds of around 0 mph when the femur snapping occurred:
A friend who spoke to Schwarzenegger after the accident said the governor was "aggravated" about what happened, describing the accident as a "slow fall" on an icy surface.Schwarzenegger's press office would not release any details about the accident. But Adi Erber, a ski instructor who was with him at the time, said Schwarzenegger was standing still before the accident, preparing for the final 200 yards of the Lower Warm Springs run.
The governor's ski pole became caught in one of his skis, causing him to trip and fall, Erber said, describing it as a "freak accident."
It may not have the added "Maria handing him a cup of scalding hot chocolate" element we dreamed up yesterday, but that succession of events is pretty much exactly how our operative described the Governor's sustained injuries. It's a spastic move completely unbefitting a card carrying member of the Aging 80s Action Heroes Club, and the lack of even a single detonated explosion at the moment his leg made contact with the icy mountain surface will undoubtedly prove more injurious to his legacy than the fact that the secret about his self-indulgent vacation policy is now a matter of public record.
[Illustration: LAT]
Comments
Actually, slow, twisting falls are quite dangerous to the bones and joints of the lower leg. It's a very common way to injure yourself while skiing.
It may not befit a rough and tumble action hero, but many an expert skier has been taken out by the slow, twisting fall.
Oh come on - skiers break bones all the time. What in God's name is so important about his broken leg that we have to read about it non-stop. Note to all media: Enough already.
Agh... Every 1 in 5.6 days is spent out of state? Depressing statistics like that are what made me stop reading political blogs. But keep it up, I like to keep my liberal rage at a low boil.
I also wanted to point out that it's possible he trying out some stunts from the upcoming sequel to Jingle All the Way in which Schwarzeneggar and Sinbad are grandfathers trying to show each other up on the slopes to win the love of their disinterested grandchildren. Personally, I think the writers in Jingle II should go with a broken hip; it's just funnier.
"He's no fun, he fell right over!"
Alternate Firesign Theatre riff:
"Somebody broke the Governator!"
Exit right to funway...
Are you sure the leg is broken?
Maybe it's a tumor.
It's not a tumor!
I'm pretty sure Sonny Bono didn't succumb to the slow, twisting fall.
He couldn't even pull a Bono. At least if he had done that, he would have gone out as (the last action) hero.
He's out of state every 5.6 days? So, what... he's out of office about five to six days a month? Is that in addition to having weekends off? If it is, than he's off work about 14 days a month...dayum! Does that warrant a medium boil, Panqueque?
That should make CA taxpayers go "hmmmmm" more than the fact he broke his leg in a "slow, twisting fall", yes?
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