Defamer
Last night, we tearfully watched as the third season of that Adderall-fueled pity party known as The Hills came to a wisdom-filled conclusion. So what did we learn last night? Aside from newly cropped and suddenly hot Justin Bobby teaching Audrina (and us) that living alone means you can “come home and cook something,” and shockingly, “have people over,” Methanie Pratt managed to summarize the entire season’s course on Lives Of The Blonde And Vapid by telling villainous Spencer that one should always “think really hard before you do anything.” Below we bring you three tidbits to carry with you forever, involving drinking on the job, dieting leessons, and when the appropriate time to “shush” someone is:
Last night, we tearfully watched as the third season of that 1) Cheese Is Yum, But May Put Junk In Your Trunk!: As sidekick Lo notes, eating a whole bunch of cheese at once feels good. It tastes good, tends to be difficult to stop eating, and makes you smile. But! After making the decision to eat an entire chunk in one sitting, we learn that the act “is not gonna be good for my behind.” Duly noted.
2. How To Get Ahead By Getting Wasted!: As we know by now, Heidi Montag will do just about everything in her power to maintain her position as the youngest PR whiz in history (also known as the token office blonde, a la Cerie Xerox on 30 Rock), but Heidi's youth gifts her with the ability to drink on the job. And Methanie's response, naturally? "Working with drinks, that sounds real legit!"
3. How To Silence Those Pesky Voices In Your Head!: As the Pratt spawns ride along this road called life (aka the 101), the unblinking Spencer suddenly begins "Shush!"ing no one in particular. After Methanie reminds him that "you don't have to shush me when I'm not talking," he continues to do just that. Which leads us to the single most satisfying epiphany we've come to all season: Spencer is not just a slimy slut, but a slimy schizo!
- THE HILLS [MTV]
Comments
I kept thinking Lo was going to be revealed to be the last remaining cylon in the last scene, then remembered I was watching "reality."
Have we decided whether this is even the same 'Justin Bobby' as last year? I don't see any resemblance.
This show does wonders for my self esteem. Thanks for making me feel like a genius by comparison.
@dluvvly: Showers can do that.
I don't have cable and therefore don't watch this show, but do they always pair people up based on hair color? Is their a colorist on staff that's all: I'm sorry our producers say you can't date him; he's a winter and you're a summer.
@dluvvly: Oh it is. Amazing what a haircut can do. Doesn't even matter what comes out of his mouth anymore; we forgive it all.
NEWS UPDATE:
A crazed gunman has taken the entire cast of the Hills hostage.
After his demands were not met the entire cast was gunned down.
No charges will be filed. The Mayor will present the gunman with a key to the city of Angels in a ceremony next week.
I try so hard not to comment on this retard parade but I can't help myself sometimes. After watching that clip I'm embarrassed to be human. Retarded monkeys have more brains then these attention starved morons (apologies to PETA!).
Adderall? Looks more like morphine.
justin bobby is infinitely hotter with a haircut, but the way he wears his sunglasses dangling from his eardrums should earn him a permanent ban from television. also, if i had to spend any amount of time in an enclosed space with stepahnie pratt, i'd be constantly shushing her unspoken thoughts myself.
I've tried to watch this show but simply cannot stand these people.
I swear I've heard more interesting, fulfilling and funny dialoge between dumb fuck soroity friends in the dressing rooms next to me at Forever 21.
@ge90036: The Hills 3:Embarassed to be Human.
It will happen, I can see it now...
Spencer's shushing had to be the highlight of that episode, but the funniest part I think I've ever seen is in the "recap show" where they showed a shot of Audrina and JB arguing by a dumpster after she caught him kissing another girl, and that Jenner kid kept saying "it's funny that they're by a dumpster because he smells bad!!"
Thank God for the flu, huh? Not only do I lose a few pounds, I get to stay in bed and watch 4 straight hours of The Hills and Tila Tequila because I'm too weak to go get the remote.
I also liked the scene in that 'never seen before' special where Audrina falls on her ass in the Jenner kid's Vegas penthouse.
@IKnowThings: Yeah, that had me laughing. I also like how he's just become "the Jenner kid."
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