Defamer
Everyone's favorite daytime punching bag Elisabeth Hasselbeck has undergone an impressive physical transformation in the six months since birthing son Taylor Thomas, shedding every trace of her pregnancy weight and showing off her newly shredded, Survivor-era physique on the cover of this month's Fitness magazine. (An alternate cover, featuring The View co-host in a revealing two-piece bathing suit reading, "Mission Accomplished," was ultimately deemed to be in questionable taste, and rejected in favor of the fetching aqua design you see above.)
In the accompanying interview, Hasselbeck reveals that with age, comes a measure of wisdom and inner-peace regarding God's Bigger Plan For How You Look in a Bikini. She explains: "I finally told myself ... 'I've got some curves, I've got a bubble butt, but I don't mind, because it's what powers me forward when I run.'" It's that fiery passion—whether in espousing the basic tenants of Joseph Pilates' Contrology theory or decrying Rev. Jeremiah Wright for being a peanut-butter-and-jelly-loving Cannibal-American—that runs through just about everything she touches. In honor of Hasselbeck, then, we take a moment to celebrate all American mothers' Constitutional rights to show off their still-perky racks and improbably toned stomachs on newsstands across the country. (Joy, Barbara, and Sherri: That obviously excludes you.)
And if you are interested in weighing in on what Miss Hasselbeck's most impressive asset is, head on over to AOL to make your voice heard! For those of you looking to cast your vote for "her fertility", sorry, that isn't one of the options.
Comments
It's a shameful situation when someone is having to reassure themselves that having a 'bubble butt' is a good thing. Of COURSE it's a good thing. Viva La Kardashian!
@denominator: OF COURSE it's a good thing. It provides more room to shove your swollen head up!
Hasselbeck Abs - File this picture under Photoshopped covers.
An alleged bubble butt and a pea sized brain.
I don't want to rain on anyone's butt parade but here's a little before and after cold water, courtesy of a professional photo retoucher (and a fashion model): [homepage.mac.com]
If her butt is so delish, why is she facing the camera?
Mischa Barton's candid can would be an improvement over Hasselbeckian sanctiomoni-ass face.
Body by Nautilus, brains by Matel
In the new millennium, we ALL have a six pack thanks to Photoshop.
@CourageousCoward: a) how did you know I'm hydrocephalic, b) why the random rancor? The kardashian comment? Are you secretly Paris leading the charge of the flat-ass brigade?
I don't want to brag, but I lost my baby weight by the time I was 3 years old.
Republican chicks are so much hotter. Sorry, but it's true. Check out the Fox whores, and then look at the absolute trolls they have on CNN.
@DexterRiley: Sorry, that doesn't explain Ann Coulter.
@psych101: Ann Coulter's Adam's apple explains Ann Coulter.
Ann Coulter?
Try Laura Ingraham. Stripper hot.
I've been told, relentlessly, how much kinder, gentler, more in touch and advanced liberals and Leftists are.
And, again, for sixty five millionth time it is proven, right here, how narrow, biased, bigoted, racist, intolerant, snarky and mysogynist that ideology.
(quote) brains by Mattel, Adam's apple .. etc.
Crude, eighth grade locker room sniggering.
Let me turn that around and start 'disssing Obama's increased supply of melanin. You know (wink wink, giggle giggle) too much dark hue signals lower intelligence and genetics that can't be trusted. (saracasm off)
Anyone else here notice that she gets very skittish whenever they do food themed segments on The View? I know she cops to having seliac disease but I think it goes deeper than that....
I'm just sayin....
@BlackFlag55:
I think Hasselback has earned some of the scorn, same goes for Coulter. It has nothing to do with which side of the aisle they sit on, it has to do with the complete garbage that comes out of their mouth. Head back to Jezebel already if you can't take it.
She has to be the most air-brained or "no-brained' celebrity of them all. I honestly felt bad for Rosie after the fiasco fallout after the last 'View" season. This woman is INTOLERABLE and it's not a shock that someone finally called her out on her 'goody-two-shoes"
act. All she can yap about is her hubby, her baby and her INANE take on politics.
What this bimbo needs is a trip to reality not a toned body, which isn't even hers thanks to airbrushing!!!!!!!!
@shag_carpet_bomb:
Come on...sure it has something to do with what side of the aisle they sit on -- that's the hypocrisy of the Left. The evil Right is mean-spirited, but not us.
I think we can agree, though, that most of the douche bags featured on this site are Left-leaning (only because conservative Hollywood types are a bunch of pussies who won't cop to leaning Right), and the shit they all say is usually worthy of derision. So in the true democratic American spirit, let's gang up on everybody. I mean, Coulter and Hasselbeck are any more worthless than 50-plus-year-old poser Sarandon and that rat-faced git Penn?
We can take it, right BlackFlag?
I like how us "Leftist"(such a lazy term) are derided for being mean-spirited for name-calling while "Rightist" hurl the old "douche bags" insults at us.
Coulter's a lame attention whore with enough apple on her throat to keep the doctor away long enough to earn Strom Thurmond's title for Most Dehydrated Living Corpse.
And Hasselback proves her worth every time she opens that mouth of hers. At least Coulter will flirt with using some wit along with her ignorant ideas. And most of her outrageous statements are intentional. Unlike Peanut butter and jelly with a side of human torso girl.
Comment on Elisabeth Hasselbeck's Abs Are Living The American Dream Can you say Photoshop? Give me a break, she may have lost her baby weight but she really isn't that toned. **************Wondering what's for Dinner Tonight? Get new twists on family favorites at AOL Food. (http://food.aol.com/dinner-tonight?NCID=aolfod00030000000001)
@CourageousCoward:
Comment on Elisabeth Hasselbeck's Abs Are Living The American Dream Totally agree with your comment, if it wasn't for Barbara giving her a job, she be at home, taking care of her kids, and her husband who probably has a wondering eye. Hopefully when her contract is up, they wont renew it, and she'll fall by the wayside. All the women on the panel have worked their way to having their own careers, where he only claim to fame was Surviovr. Can't stand the broad. **************Wondering what's for Dinner Tonight? Get new twists on family favorites at AOL Food. (http://food.aol.com/dinner-tonight?NCID=aolfod00030000000001)
@baileyswalk:
You need to read the post a little more carefully: "...that most of the douche bags featured on this site are Left-leaning...."
That means anybody who shows up here is a celebrity douche -- Right or Left.
@DexterRiley:
Dexter... are you on fucking CRACK?
@BlackFlag55:
It's OK BlackFlag55, I know it's hard being aligned with a group of people who are the same end of the rope as Al Qaeda and the Taliban, but there's no need to start crying. Man up! You're a conservative! Remember, you lack any sort of heart or soul!
...some of these comments are another exercise in how ignorant people can get when they are confronted with someone who looks better and thinks differently than them.
Shame really. You guys make me laugh -
@Oxytone:
Yeah, we're the mean-spirited name-callers -- likening conservatives to the "...same end of the rope as Al Qaeda and the Taliban."
Hey, let up, you have to hand it to the Lady! I really always thought she was stuck up Broad, but she's looking Beautiful now!!!!I'd love to be on the View 1 Time! I'd tell them waht's it like to make a regular living!!!!
why don't people leave someone like Elizabeth alone! I always thought she was a stuck up person, but you have to hand it to her! She's sure beautiful & getting Prettier!
I'd love to be on the View 1 Time & tell them 5 Ladies just what Real life is Like!!!! But as for her Looks, she's alot prettier & built better then these Little girls like Lindsey, Paris & and the girl that forgott she didn't have panties on YEH RIGHT
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