What would the world's oldest profession do without Charlie Sheen? Hollywood's most famed lover of pay-for-play has been outed by his current madam in the newest issue of Rolling Stone, who claims that his prostitution habit is still going stronger than ever — even after court-ordered rehab. As "Nici" tells celebrity exposé specialist Vanessa Grigoriadis in the story, she "dropped four girls off at his penthouse, [and] found the actor in silk pajamas with 'C. MaSheen' embroidered over the pocket. Sheen gave her a $20,000 check for the girls, and she picked them up several hours later." And while the fact that Sheen is (allegedly) still romping around with escorts after all these years is pretty pathetic, even more so is his publicist's excuse:

Apparently not entirely on top of his clients' current affairs as he should be, Sheen's publicist Stan Rosenfield issued a statement to the NY Post letting them know that "this is an old, old, old story. But, if you're looking for a really good story, I heard that Joe DiMaggio and Marilyn Monroe are getting a divorce." As the RS story alleges, Sheen had been using Nici's services up until last year. So either Rosenfield has absolutely no idea what the article claims, or thinks the usage of "old" three times will make last year seem just as long ago as 1954. In addition to adding a few more gossip pages into his Google Reader, Rosenfield might want to consider how prophecies he once made to the American Journalism Review have come to fruition: "Freedom of the press doesn't mean you have to be vitriolic...but [the press], in their rush to be super-competitive, gave the control to us. Any power, eventually we're going to lose it."

[Photo credit: Splash]

• SHEEN STAYED HOT FOR HOOKERS [NY Post]