Defamer
There were plenty of noteworthy moments from last night's American Idol Tribute to the Many Songs and Slutty Looks of Mariah Carey, from David Cook's soundtrack-ready, grungemo rendition of "Always Be My Baby," to a stirring performance of ''When You Believe" by a leather bepanted David Archuleta (who could have just as easily located the spiritually redeeming undercurrent to the "shoe do do do do do do do/shoe do do do do do do yeahs" of "Fantasy"). But the most thrilling development, for us at least, came not from the stage, but rather the judge's table, shortly before Randy Jackson was called upon to apply his highly attuned pitchydar to Carly Smithson's take on "Without You."
There were plenty of noteworthy moments from last night's It was at that moment that the panel's mischief-making sourpuss, Simon Cowell, leaned into Paula Abdul's wig and quietly suggested, from as best as we can make out, "He won't admit that he got a boner." As predicted, Jackson made not a single reference to any involuntary anatomical reactions elicited by the Irish bar wench's power-warbling, unless of course his declarations of having "a HOT ONE TONIGHT, DAWG!!!" were in reference to his own lusty, subequatorial stirrings.
Comments
He won't admit he's got a boner, Simon, because he hasn't seen his penis since he gained back all that weight last year.
It sounds so classy with that british accent.
@Old No.7:Wait! You mean Simon has a penis?
It's good to have you back, Seth. P.S. "Fantasy" is my favorite, too. You don't have to admit it's yours. I know.
Seth's back!
I won't admit that I just got a boner.
Whew. For a moment I was worried that Lisanti had him chained to a bed in the Celebrity Centre.
Hey Seth. How was that two-fingered Argentinian oil change?
Boner. Ha! How outrageous! I can't believe the acerbic brit judge on the talent show with contestants sans personalities said that! Wow! Are there no more limits?!?
@SanFranBetsu:
yes - just ask Ryan Seacrest
I hate to disappoint you, but what he actually said was "You wanted milk but you got a donut." All part of the nonsense he whispers in Paula's ear every week to torment her.Think back to the moth and the melon. I appreciate your dirty mind though, lol. But I'd rather not go there with the Dawg. And dude, that is NOT a wig.
i love that show
He says you wanted milk but you got a doughnut. Clean out you ears. lol
@BoHan: True, I was attending to some subequatorial stirrings of my own. Missed you guys!
@Seth: Me too! I totally heard it was better than Botox!
@Seth: I'm glad you weren't back Monday, actually. I was hungover and NOT up for a new round of linkblog tennis. I thought "why bring the game when there ain't no playas?"
Shortly after the premature ouster of Kristy Lee Cook in favor of the completely un-talented Brooke White, all of Kristy's videos were quickly pulled from YouTube.
White's are still there. She is destined to become the next forgettable Taylor Hicks.
Also, Kristy had a long pre-Idol contract with Arista Nashville (Carrie Underwood's label) and released several CDs and music videos with them. She may still be with them, but I heard she was not.
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