Engaged And Underaged

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The Spears family is never short on surprises, and today's announcement that Juno Lynn Spears' sperminator Casey Aldridge will go from babydaddy to fiance is one of the most pleasant ones we've heard in years. Casey, who's all of 18, apparently gifted Jamie-Lynn with the extraordinarily detailed-in-description "rock" a few days ago, and People reports that Spears has been flashing it around ever since to friends and family. All we're left wondering is what kind of party the heavily preggers Jamie Lynn will throw come April 2nd, the date of her 17th birthday. Our suggestion? An Abba-themed 70s dance-a-thon, during which JL will sing/cry her way through "Dancing Queen, young and sweet, only seventeeeeeen" over and over and over. [People]

1:14 PM on Tue Mar 25 2008
By Molly Friedman
921 views
15 comments

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Pop Socket at 01:34 PM on 03/25/08
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But will the baby's real daddy get invited to the ceremony?
CourageousCoward at 01:56 PM on 03/25/08
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That's nice, but I'm still asking for a paterninty test.
Greg Johnson at 02:01 PM on 03/25/08
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Now all that's left is for him to be on reality tv with her, have another baby, get divorced, put out a rap album, watch her go nuts, get the kids, get fat and go golfing.

Siiiick.
Hart88 at 02:51 PM on 03/25/08
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Bet the kid looks like K-Fed
CakeAndDeath at 02:54 PM on 03/25/08
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Hot damn, they's a-fixin' on gettin' hitched? Where's my dang-on banjo!?
SanFranBetsu at 03:05 PM on 03/25/08
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@SteamyMcFirecrotch: If they go on Jerry Springer he'll pay for the test.
TootieFields at 03:45 PM on 03/25/08
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You could tell that Pierre did truly love the Mademoiselle.
DukeLaCrosse at 04:12 PM on 03/25/08
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@SanFranBetsu: Forget Springer. Everyone knows Maury is where it's at for DNA tests. "LaMonte...... you are NOT the father!" LaMonte then proceeds to break into his victory dance and high five male audience members. That's good TV, kids.
ricker at 04:31 PM on 03/25/08
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Shortly after the wedding ceremony, The Disney Channel will air "The Happiest Little Statutory Rape Victim" starring Dakota Fanning as JL and Scott Baio as Scott Baio.
hissykitty at 05:01 PM on 03/25/08
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I bet she now realizes that NOTHING she does
not even getting knocked up before her seventeeth birthday could ever upstage Britney in the (im)fame(y) game!
bess marvin, girl... at 05:03 PM on 03/25/08
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@Pop Socket: zing!
ASmallTurnip at 05:35 PM on 03/25/08
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@TootieFields: Chuck Berry loves you for that. And so do I.
yvonnjanae at 10:27 PM on 03/25/08
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@CakeAndDeath:
My innards are a'hurtin' from my laughin'
Little Mintz Sunshine at 11:19 PM on 03/25/08
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"The couple are registered at Claire's, American Girl, Forever 21 and Gamestop."
dumblonde at 08:06 AM on 03/26/08
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I'm still stuck on wtf, is Jamie Lynn allergic to birth control?! Srsly, if you take precautions it's not that easy to get pregnant. Oh but wait. She's a redneck. nevermind