Defamer
The last time Kirstie Alley appeared on daytime television (flaunting her slim-ish new frame on Oprah), we applauded the self-proclaimed Fat "Actress" for keeping up her promise to Jenny Craig. But after squirming through the appearance, we ultimately decided one daytime appearance was enough for us to stomach. Kirstie, however, seems to disagree. People is reporting that Alley has just signed a deal with Oprah's Harpo production company to host her very own daytime show (in addition to other potentially televised projects). As Alley herself put it, "Nothing shocks me. I'm a great listener. I'm a good comedian. And I won't lie - I live a beautiful life." But considering the ill fates of both Megan Mullally's and Gabrielle Carteris' attempts to lure housewives into their femme-angled daily circle of televised love, we have to wonder whether or not Kirstie's destined for cancellation, or fierce enough to carry on the tradition of fellow slim-ish daytime host Tyra Banks...
As we all know, Megan's daytime show with a confusing chit-chat theme about all topics under the sun (we assume she was angling for Oprah's spot in the limelight, but why, Megan, why?) was swiftly canceled over a year ago, marking her post-Will And Grace comeback a quasi-disaster. And then there was the case of comeback-seeking Gabrielle Carteris, who debuted Gabrielle in 1995, only to have it canceled within a year. (But hey! She kinda "came back" on The Surreal Life along with Corey Feldman in 2005, right? Well, nevermind.)
But there is one daytime diva whose footsteps Kirstie might consider following, and those footsteps belong to Miss Tyra. The secret to Tyra's success remains a mystery to us, but her repeated usage of fat suits to prove that some kind of fatist conspiracy theory exists seems to keep viewers tuning in. While we doubt Kirstie would dare chub up for the cameras, we'd advise her to force her audience members into the sweaty contraptions.
- KIRSTIE ALLEY SIGNS DEAL WITH OPRAH [People]
- KIRSTIE ALLEY SIGNS DEAL WITH OPRAH WINFREY'S HARPO PRODUCTIONS [Digital Media Net]
Comments
There may be a fat tractor beam at work here. Sucking in viewers before they can escape the suffocating cellulite of daytime TV.
Oprah! What are you thinking? Smother this thing in it's infancy and do a design show with Nate Berkus instead.
It was pitched as "Rikki" - with a Scientology twist
Did you HAVE to show that picture of her huge thighs and ass? What have we ever done to you?!
Actually I hear this has a neat premise. They have designed a set with a wooden table of sorts - a bar if you will. She'll have some co-hosts, the casting call is going out for a number of folks - a wise-cracking ethnic lady - think a white Wanda Sykes, a guy like Kenneth the Page and someone like retired Curt Schilling. Oh and two older chummy working class guys.
Another star was hosting but she left to do movies. I think this is gonna be BIG.
@scroll_lock:
Maybe Fat Kirstie can be the new Grazer Head.
And out there, somewhere in the wilderness, on a moonless night punctuated by the lonely howl of the coyote, Shelley Long is sobbing.
@NotReadyForPrimeTime: I wonder if Grazer was wearing shiny pantyhose in that Grazerhead shot. Only Lisanti would know, I guess.
"Nothing shocks me. Except my Mark Super VII Quantum E-meter!"
I sense a theme for Kirstie's first Big Fat Crappy Cult Shit Giveaway Brainwashing Show....Well, that and Spanx.
She looks like she's channeling Tyra in the photo.
@Sweet Panda Love: or thanking god and laughing her sweet head off at the disaster this woman has become. living well's the best revenge...
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