With Sex and the City: The Movie inching ever closer to its May 30th release date (will Carrie and Big end up together? No don't tell us—we don't want to know! Hurts so good!), and today's announcement of a Beverly Hills 90210 primetime reimagining, we're certain more than a few of you have some Sarah Jessica Parker and Tori Spelling on the brain. Sadly, both women are currently taken, and idling outside their homes in a red '84 Ford Tempo with tinted windows in the hopes of winning some much-needed face time with your TV idols is largely frowned upon by the authorities. (Just trust us on that one.) That's where Pipedream Products' celebrity blow-up dolls come in handy, offering easy-to-inflate, polyurethane likenesses of some of your favorite stars.

Donna and Carrie not your speed? Not to worry, there's plenty more where those came from. Each comes with a Certificate of Authenticity, "three tender love openings," and filthy packaging worth the price of admission alone. (We had to pixelate out SJP's—too filthy!—but the original can be found here. NSFW! You've been warned!) Here's to hoping both blow-up Carrie and Donna eventually find their Lars.

4:23 PM on Thu Mar 13 2008
By Seth
12,932 views
12 comments

Comments

NotReadyForPrimeTime at 04:34 PM on 03/13/08
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Why did the manufacturers choose two of the horsiest-looking actresses? Is there a subliminal message?
NoWireHangers at 04:34 PM on 03/13/08
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Connectedness Index: 91

Wow, they even have a "J.Ho: Famous Fanny Love Doll" tagged "Booty From the Block."
Sleepyhead at 05:20 PM on 03/13/08
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This cries out for an investigative-reporting style report. Send the new guy to go try them out!
419Baiter at 06:26 PM on 03/13/08
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Those pictures remind me of the illustrations on the cabinets of video arcade games.
Transuranic at 06:45 PM on 03/13/08
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...idling outside their homes in a red '84 Ford Tempo with tinted windows in the hopes of winning some much-needed face time with your TV idols is largely frowned upon...

Seth, I knew you'd written this one by the italicized above. Love your posts. Don't go changin'!
Colonel Mustard at 11:57 PM on 03/13/08
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"3 fabulous love holes" was the original name of Blink-182.
CourageousCoward at 07:14 AM on 03/14/08
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I am pretty sure these are not "Officially Licensed Products." Pipedream's about to go up in smoke.
BIG WHEEL at 10:07 AM on 03/14/08
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@SteamyMcFirecrotch: They covered their bases pretty well with the "Tori" one. "9021HO" is classic, along with "Beverley Thrills." They used another girl for the picture too, that looks way better than Tori Spelling yet is probably working as a fluffer somewhere...
kthnxbai at 10:09 AM on 03/14/08
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I'm officially calling all my orfices "love holes" from now on. Thanks Defamer!
caffeinequeen at 10:17 AM on 03/14/08
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Three orifices? Does that include the crater on the side of Tori Spelling's implant?
Whiteboyfunfark at 01:45 PM on 03/14/08
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I couldn't even begin to afford the Manolos and Jimmy Choo's to keep my new pneumatic BFF in the style to which she's accustomed. And wouldn't the inflation hole count as a fourth, or is that not considered love?
raincoaster at 02:31 PM on 03/14/08
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@bowleen: Pretty much all of the models they used are better-looking than the actresses: Hohan is the only one who's got someething to complain about.