He's looking trim.

Look on the bright side, while we may be waking up from this long national nightmare it will be years before my co-worker gets tired of telling everyone about her scabby uterus. Consider yourselves lucky.

Cloverfield?

Lew Wasserman is my kind of scum. Fearless and inventive.

Also, I pay my plumber residuals on toilet flushes. Are you saying I might be getting ripped off?

All kidding aside, I think it's really great that amid all the empty threats and posturing that went on in the Guild, one member had the temerity to step up and actually swallow Nick Counter whole in order to move things along.

I only hope the CNN cameras were still rolling when Vilanch disgorged him, Jon-Voight-in-Anaconda-style, and slithered away in search of Gavin Polone.

Wow, even Jabba the Hutt has a second gig.

God, Vilanch looks like an alien. His face seems superimposed on a cabbage patch doll.

sweep the bangs over to the side a bit and you've got yourself a blonde Anton Chigurh

He's got to go back on Celebrity Fit Club.

What's the bet Bruce wasn't on the picket...

So does that mean Wasserman shouldn't have been paid continuing profits on his studio's films? And that Wasserman didn't get a cut of that, salary, bonuses, stock, etc.? Let's let all the producers write their own material, and see how much money comes into Hollywood.

And now a post from the year 1998:

Holy crap, I didn't know Linda Tripp had a twin sister!

Jesus, Cousin Oliver has really let himself go.

@raincoaster5: you're reading my sparkly-distracted mind. I looked at the pic before even seeing the story and thought, "is Leia gonna be on a chain in the disco here while Jabba's bonging frogs?" Jeez, dude, now that you're not "writing" for the hollywood squares, take a walk or something.

"Bring me a bucket."

He is a smart fella though; I note he's wearing this season's deep plum lipstick.

@Imnotatnbc: Spot on!

Why, exactly, does anyone listen to Bruce Vilanch? I keep hearing that he's such a great comedy writer, but he's painfully un-funny. So if he can't do that, why is he here?

Is it just me or does Bruce Vilanch look like an exact cross between Peter and Chris Griffin in that clip?

Holy Cow! Is Bruce Playing Jabba the Hut now? Wow, he has really gained some weight!

@NFlames:
Not a cross of them, but if they merged, Peter & Chris might be half the body Fat Bruce is.

And I prefer the story of Wasserman, who had a huge koi pond, sending a pair of his koi to an actor who just bought a new house that also had a koi pond. The actor not know what the pond was or for put the fish on the grill.
Very expensive dinner!

Now, now. Bruce isn't overweight. He's just three feet too short. (Ba-dum tssssssss.)

No the plummer doesn't charge each time you flush the toliet, but he most certainly makes up for it when you need him, doesn't he?

Jesus, the struggle with what, Jenny Craig? Bruce apparently passed the time these last three months eating mallomars and nutella only.

I do credit him with starting the ironic t-shirt movement, though. You'd think he'd worked for Old Navy.

@Miss d: Actually, he went picket line-to-picket line, constantly sniffing for truffles (or donuts, scones, pizza, and fried babies).

@Desk_hack: Were Nutella crepes on the picket lines? If so,I am so there next time 'round. I'd go even for the Mallomars. I thought they weren't made anymore.

It's not the triple chin that is the problem (who is not guilty of that?) it's the haircut for retards that has got to go.

Since when was this post about BV's weight? I'm no snarkaphobe or soapboxer but some of you folks need to lay off the fatty-hating. If the fatso gags were funny they'd get a pass, but most of y'all are just being cruel.

@Pomalina: Well, if he any luck finding truffles - he wouldn't bother writing any more...

Bruce Vilanch is Hilarious!
Bruce gets hit by a semi truck.
www.BruceGetsHit.com