Defamer
We never did get around to buying a ticket to Rocky Balboa during its theatrical run, as obsolescent action star Sylvester Stallone's comeback vehicle promised (at best) a body count limited to a sexagenarian pugilist whose steroid-weakened heart exploded from the exertion of flailing in the general direction of an opponent four decades his junior. After reviewing the above LAT chart (full scan here) detailing the carnage depicted in each chapter of the Rambo saga, however, we have no such concerns about the new installment's violence level; not only will we show up at the multiplex on Friday night, we'll be in our seats well before the coming attractions begin, knowing that with a staggering rate of 2.59 deaths-per-minute, wandering in during the opening credit sequence could deprive us of the experience of double-digit kills.
- Dead and Deader [WOW Report]
- Dead and Deader [LAT]
Comments
The trailer seems to show Rambo punching a guy's head off, so these numbers seem about right. That being said, First Blood was a great movie.
I'm betting there are more deaths than actual words of dialogue. Which, considering Stallone's track record, is no bad thing.
I've got the feeling the new movie would be great fun after a few beers/hits. Though I can't see it as a great first-date movie.
@cardboardbelt: I laughed like a fucking madman when I saw the trailer - yes, he does seem to punch a guy's head off. Truly, his reach does exceed his grasp.
I dare anyone to watch that last scene in FIRST BLOOD and not shed a tear. Do it!
Number of People who:
Watched Rambo I: 12
Watched Rambo II: 9
Watched Rambo III: 5
Will Watch Rambo IV: 0
Anyone remember the fake commericial that was on SNL(?) back in the 80's that was:
SYLVESTER STALLONE AND CHUCK NORRIS: DIE FORIEGNER DIE!
@viruswithshoes: Oh, it will be. I can't think of a movie since "Shoot Em' Up" that's made me this pumped about the fact that I live within walking distance of the Magic Johnson Theater.
For the record, that cop in First Blood fell out of the helicopter, John Rambo did not kill him. I think the body count is zero, but I could be wrong.
@spanktastic: better make that at least 2 for IV. i'll be there opening night.
No shirt off killing in IV? Where's the J.J Rambo of Part II fame I know and love?
Classic quote - "It's like someone invites you to a party and you don't show up. It doesn't really matter."
This chart demonstrates the only way in which each succeeding film is "greater" than its predecessor.
(hope this isn't a duplicate...silly interwebs...)
This chart demonstrates the only possible way in which each succeeding film is "greater" than its predecessors.
What a quality benchmark, it's like saying White Castle's new burger is the greatest because it comes with more toilet paper!
The chart is wrong. He didn't kill that cop in First Blood. The cop fell out of the helicopter. HE DIDN'T DRAW FIRST BLOOD!
@BabylonSister: total dupe ;)
My fiancee thinks I'm absolutely insane, because I'm absolutely totally excited to go see this. Apparently girls aren't supposed to cream themselves over movies with titles such as "Rambo," "Rocky," or anything with Stallone for that matter...
@viruswithshoes: I dunno... when you're juiced up, anything is possible - even punching a guy's head off.
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