You were likely unable to focus on anything since we alerted you to the fact that Kevin Federline's life may be in danger: a distressing scenario that conjured the image of a coldblooded assassin silently stalking the lovable pimp as he lay unsuspecting on his couch, improving his already ridiculous Major League Baseball 2K7 game. And then there was the question of method: Would it be 45 caliber hollow point bullet, choke wire, Escalade bomb, or Gay Vito-brand pool cue? Thankfully, none at all, as Us magazine reports that the threat was deemed not credible by the FBI:

Laura Eimiller, a spokeswoman for FBI Press Relations in the Los Angeles Field Office, explains, "We received information, which was not specific and uncorroborated, and because there was no federal jurisdiction, out of an abundance of caution, we shared the information with local authorities who pursued it further."

In response to questions about where the initial information came from, she tells Us, "I'm not confirming the nature of the source, and any of the information contained in it. It is not credible. We looked into it."

This welcome news couldn't have come at a better moment, just as we began to indulge our deepest fears that Sean Preston and the other one would be cruelly robbed of both their parents: one to a hitman, the other to a naked, party-drugged existence spent in lusty pursuit of braggart college boys in hotel Jacuzzis around the world.

• FBI & LAPD: K-Fed Threat Wasn't Credible [Us Weekly]
• Ex-bodyguard says Spears used drugs [Reuters]